Transcript:
Hey what’s up ego hackers? Welcome to the CS Joseph podcast. When Winter edition it’s winter. Now finally the temperatures are below freezing at last. But that’s not going to stop me from being outside, be in an urban area or a more natural area.
I just need to be outside would filming, just have that step that need I don’t know why. Plus, like to be able to enjoy some tobacco while while recording for you, folks. So I know that this month, it’s been a little bit difficult to get the acolyte videos out. I apologize for that, recovering from sickness, sickness that lingered for like 12 days straight.
That was really hard. And been dealing with that. And there’s a lot of operational things that came up plus, we had the new launch of Bucha. If you guys haven’t checked out the new version of Bucha, although we are still making some changes.
There’s got to be some changes to the sword and mace, verbiage. And then also some changes made to question four. But for the most part, it’s getting better and better as we go. And pretty thankful for that.
Hopefully, the wind is not too bad I got my wind jammer on, but for some reason, it may actually fail. So I’ll do my best in editing to get that wind out. So I’m still trying to experiment on for some reason, this microphone is not as good on this camera than my last one. Although this camera is way better.
So it’s it’s kind of frustrating. Really frustrating to that, like the newer stuff. The newer camera doesn’t like the microphone. So anyway, enough with the worthless chitchat, let’s get on with the show showing.
So this is an acolyte question. And this is basically how does an ENTP and an ISTP together as a couple approach parenting and or, conversely, how would one go about parenting and NTP and ISTP? Well, that question is available in the members area, see it shows.ly forward slash members, go to journeyman become a journeyman member, and watch the union parenting lecture series. We have how to parent all of the 16 types. And you guys can get educated there.
But this particular question, basically, how would an ENTP and an ISTP together approach parenting children? I find this a very fascinating question. The ESTP and the ISTP is one of the eight sexual compatible relationships. And it is known as the intrigue, relationship. Now, folks, the intrigue relationship, and I’m just gonna give you guys like a very small preview of what’s gonna be coming up in an upcoming in an upcoming course.
It’s going to be called to date ready? How to get yourself date ready, basically. But I’m going to give you a small snippet here as part of the answer to this acolyte question. So you guys can kind of see what that course is a little bit about. But that course is going to be delving really deep into the eight sexual compatibilities, or at least, exposing some of the nuance and some of the meaning behind the eight sexual compatibilities.
And then how you yourself can prepare yourself to date any of the eight sexual compatibilities and what you need to do to get ready basically, before you enter the dating pool, and then naturally, the next course will be okay, now you’re in the dating pool, what do I do? And then the course after that is going to be failure proof your relationship which we’ve been talking about for a very long time. Yes, I know, it’s annoying that we keep pushing it back. However, we realized it was just kind of wiser to break it up into smaller chunks, and then release smaller courses instead of like releasing like a mega course with a huge price tag on it. Because not everybody is going to have the opportunity to benefit from that.
So like from you know, huge price points. That’s just kind of ridiculous. So yeah, we’re breaking it up the content to make it more accessible to everybody. So they Thank you all for your patience for that.
But within the date ready course, this is just a small preview, the intrigue relationship, as one of the eight sexual compatibility solves a particular problem. And really, the problem that it solves is ultimately boredom. And the intrigue relationship is known as one of the four fling relationships. That being said, you know, there are people who are in fling relationships who have turned this you know, short term relationship or STR into a long term relationship to to like hard work and effort basically into like ltrs, basically.
So it is possible to turn a fling relationship into a long term relationship, but not that great effort, basically. And, being that this is the relationship that solves boredom, when you’re having children within the context of the intrigue, relationship, that can definitely present some challenges, and hence the acolyte member who felt the need to actually ask this question. Remember, folks, that acolyte members get the ability to ask me one question per month, and it is turned into a YouTube video, as well as a podcast episode. Don’t forget, I haven’t forgotten about season 14, part four.
We’ve only that very soon, as well as I continued to get into the mix, and whatnot. But that’s something that’s going to be happening as time goes on. We are going to be getting the acolyte videos out, we are going to be getting out some of the other there’s like three seasons, we have planned for public release, we’re gonna be getting those episodes as well. As soon as I get a little bit more organized from an operations perspective with the team, and delegate out some of my personal tasks to them.
So I can be focused on creating content. So we’re working on that things are happening, thank you all for your patience. So but parenting presents a particular challenge the intrigue relationship, because the intrigue relationship in its own right actually ends up solving the problem of boredom. And when, when the relationship actually ends up solving that problem, it ends up becoming like its own worst enemy, basically, which is why this relationship ends up as a short term relationship, one of the four, and that can be difficult.
That could be thankfully and then adding children into the mix increases that difficulty factor. Especially because then it’s like, okay, well hold on, who’s going to be providing the extroverted thinking because remember, there’s there’s a lack of emotional compatibility. And this can present a series of problems. For example, when you have children and given that the intp, the ISTP in question are both Extroverted Feelers, when you have children present.
Those two egos as parents are literally going to be looking oftentimes not just to each other for Introverted feeling. And the NTP is going to have it especially difficult because FIDM is just not going to comply no matter what. So then the NTP is going to have a lot of pressure as a parent to provide some kind of FYI because it’s FYI, optimistic, introverted, feeling optimistic. Coming from, you know, its shadow, basically the INTJ shadow, and but it’s a trickster, and it’s not really going to be enough for the ISTP to gain validation from the relationship, it’s going to be very difficult.
So the ISTP is going to project that need for validation onto their children, regardless of what type their children are. So if their children also is a TI Fe user, like for example, if you had a, an ESTP as a child, right, get an ESTP as a child, and I know one particular couple, who is in the eagle hacker community, they are an ESTP man and an ISTP woman and she has an ESTP child and oh my god, there is like some serious like difficulties that could come from that. But both of their egos are looking for Introverted Feeling from each other. And then that need is ultimately going to be projected upon the ESTP which is going to cause the ESTP some serious issues.
And the ESTP may end up you know, just from like the paradigm shift, you know, from an octagon point of view be forced to become unconscious focus, just to deal with the fact that there is such a high demand for Introverted Feeling within the context of this relationship. Now, granted, I could say okay, this might be one of the rare occasions where having another child would be a good thing, but the thing is, is that you can’t guarantee that the next child is going to be an introverted feeler, at least not yet. Now, it’s likely I would say given the amount of Fe that the next child wouldn’t be an extroverted feeler. But even I can’t make that judgment, especially since like growing up within my own nuclear family.
You had 2x rated feeling user parents, and then both their children were also extroverted feeling. And that is a serious issue. That’s also a, there’s another nuclear family by part of my uncle, my uncle being an ENTP. I thought he was an INFJ.
But I’ve recently realized that actually, he’s probably an ESTP, who is ISFJ developed. You know, fourth, his octave Graham, married to an ENFJ woman, and they both had an ESTP and an ISTP. Son, two STP sons. So it’s just basically like a giant Extraverted Feeling F fest, you know, and it’s just like, Oh, my God, what are we going to do? Like, how are we going to cope with that situation, especially since the ENTPs over time, they’ll be able to handle it, but they will suffer over time, due to the lack of emotional validation.
And that too, will actually put the ESTP in an unconscious focus situation. And then if they’re already unconscious, developed, it could actually increase their malevolence, their level of malevolence, you know, with their shadow pole, basically, you know, from a temple exploration perspective. Go on, learn more about the temples, we are going very deep right now on cognitive origins and the shadow and the aspiration polls right now, in the season 18 content in the journeyman a member section, I recommend checking that out, we already have one episode out, we got four more to go. So and by the way, for like the public releases for season 18 content, you’re gonna have to like wait two years to get access to this, because we’re only releasing one per month.
So if you don’t want to wait that long, you might want to go check that out. But anyway, the point is, is that there’s, there’s a host, there’s a host of problems here. And the bottom line is, is that in this type of nuclear family context, no one is going to be happy emotionally, which is literally going to in my opinion, this is really an opinion, I mean, sure, the ISTP is going to have to learn to let go of their pride and be willing to listen. But that’s a tall order, that’s a real, real tall order for an ISTP to do in the context of this relationship.
And the communication problems, like there’s only so much sexual activity that is that can actually, you know, be a salve to this situation or be a solution. Because you know, like pedagogue relationships, also known as the companion and the intrigue, relationships, these relationships, heavily rely on sexual activity in order to be the glue for the relationship. And you know, it’s not going to be a long term solution, you know, and then adding in the complexities of parenting on top of that, that too, is going to be the issue because the intp is just going to have to accept that it’s their responsibility to be the introverted feeler, of the of the of the family, basically, it’s it, they’re gonna realize that that’s going to have to be their duty. But if the NTP is not prepared for that, and if they’re not already unconscious, developed for that, that’s gonna be a huge problem.
And not only that, like they’re off the ground will likely change to unconscious, developed unconscious focused just to do just to adapt to that situation, due to neuroplasticity. And that, again, is going to cause them to become malevolent. And they’re going to end up feeling entitled to that malevolence, the intp is going to be perceived, like, Oh, I’m being abused here in this nuclear family. And then they will basically devolve into abusive behavior themselves, which really sucks.
And then naturally, this is going to cause damage to the children. This is very dangerous, but what’s gonna, what’s gonna be the end result of that? Well, emotional affairs, the ISTP woman likely due to hypergamy we’ll end up seeking emotional affairs with other people. In order to get that those emotional, those Introverted Feeling needs met, basically because Introverted Feeling is completely absent from her own family. Now, if one of her children is, again, I’m just using ISTP woman as an example, but it doesn’t matter like regardless of gender, the result would still be the same.
The genders of these two types. Now there is a chance that it could be okay if the child or if one of their children that they have is an introverted feeler, but that child will end up getting preferential treatment the majority of the attention specifically because they are the one source in the nuclear family providing the Introverted Feeling for all of the other Emotional Vampires of the Extroverted Feelers that is present, which could create envy and jealousy within their siblings. And that too, is an absolute disaster. And then that child though, the introverted feeler would literally it’d be seen as the golden child, basically, of the family.
And in the long run, it’s just going to cause some serious, serious problems. So you already have the high risk of emotional affairs. And that’s not to say that the end of the relationship could not also seek emotional affairs as well. There’s a very high risk of that, too.
But it’s, but whichever which way, whichever one of these types, the intp, or the ISTP, in question, whichever one of them is the woman, that one is the one who will likely seek the emotional affair first, or the quickest, or is the most likely one to actually do the emotional affair, which could eventually lead to, you know, worst age as a sexual affair. And that would really, really suck, that would really suck. That’s because of this familial situation. As a result, I personally do not recommend creating a nuclear family, or raising children within the context of this relationship between an intp and an ISTP.
I just don’t, I just don’t recommend it. That’s not to say that an insane amount of effort and communication can go in there, but it’s already pretty much set up for failure because the ISTP because they’re part of the mind temple. And because you know, they have the pride deadly sin, it’s more than likely that communication is going to stop before it even begins. And even and then the intp is going to walk away feeling dismissed consistently, which is going to lead to a higher level of malevolence due to like the natural shift in the octave gram of the intp, which means the abuse is going to go up and then it’s going to lead to a downward spiral.
And so at this point, like this couple were to come to me for coaching, I just feel like okay, communication is the only way to get through it, I tell the ISTP you actually don’t know anything, you ti hero thinks you know things, but you really don’t, you have to actually devote yourself to listening. And the burden of listening would be much higher on the ISTP than the NTP. However, the burden of sympathy is going to be much higher on the NTP as well, which is also going to be very difficult. And, you know, and then add in, you know, the union parenting techniques that you have for the specific children that this EMTP and ISTP parent couple are responsible for, that ends up making it also pretty, it makes it pretty bad, it also makes it worse as well.
And I’m just like, it’s just not good. It’s just not a really good relationship. Now, if you find yourself, Oh, crap, this is my nuclear family well, and you come to me and you hire me, I’m just gonna throw books at you. Basically, I’d be like, Okay, you need to read this, you need to communicate this way.
You need to develop some systems or procedures that you have to follow on a regular basis. Like for example, I’m in Akin, a kindred relationship and a kindred relationship, I would say is like, a worse relationship than an intrigue relationship to a point. But, but for most people, since most people don’t know union analytical psychology, and I mean, like in the context of my kindred relationship with Railgun, we actually do have two children between us that are introverted feelers, so that’s really nice. And she has girlfriends who are introverted feelers, I have a bunch of male friends who are introverted feelers, so we’re able to cope as a result in that situation.
So with this intrigue, relationship between ESTP and ISTP, they need to make sure that they have friends who are their gender, who are providing FYI, that’s, that’s a really, really big deal there because again, this pain is going to translate over to the children. And there’s still many issues and they still have the responsibility of like having union parenting approach. But human nurture is really going to be a huge huge play. Nurture basically is the you know, by nurture is going to be the only way to really solve any problems.
So I would recommend the book, Love and respect by Emerson agric. I’d also recommend how to keep the guy by Matthew Hussey would also be a book. Also, I would have both of them read the book attached and also codependent no more because codependent no more really assists Extroverted Feelers, with being able to communicate. But you know, Railgun and I, for example, have this thing called like, feedback Friday where we just, we spend we we separate time for each other, and we literally write out things on a piece of paper, which is important.
When Extroverted Feelers write things out because an extrovert feeler when you write something out, it forces them into their unconscious side of their mind, to use Introverted Feeling and the extroverted thinking necessary to actually spend the time and have the patience to write something out on paper. So it’s like this FYI, emulation procedure that they can follow. And that’s what I would recommend to coaching clients in this situation, you know, oh crap, you better you better like watch out, write that stuff down and literally go through it with each other line by line, almost like it’s like a, like a board meeting for the relationship basically. And that’s really the only coping mechanisms that I know, that could preserve in if not protect the relationship.
But here’s the situation. Eventually, like the relationship is not going to have any more boredom to solve. You know, if they get to a point where they’re super happy, and then at that point, there needs to be a reintroduction of tension into the relationship. Now, there is one advantage though, there’s one advantage to this relationship that can help provide longevity.
And this comes from the book mating in captivity by Esther Perel, because like in a lot of relationships that are emotionally compatible, sympathy actually can destroy sexual desire. Now, good thing that there isn’t very much sympathy in this relationship, because they’re both Extroverted Feelers, and it can keep the sexual desire going. And it can prolong using sexuality as a solution to keeping this couple together for the sake of the children. But again, that’s still very high risk, it’s very, very high risk.
So because adding parenting pressure on top of all this is extremely difficult. And if they do have an introverted feeler, as a child, like I said, that child will basically be seen and treated as the golden child and the other children will slowly grow to hate their sibling, that if I use their sibling over time, unless, of course, there’s multiple introverted feelers as children, then that would be okay. So in the long run, potentially a volume of children to make sure that there are at least multiple ePHI users probably would be the healthiest thing. But again, is that really worth that effort and that investment because raising those children and getting them to the point where they’re potty trained, et cetera, like, by then the relationship would have potentially already broken down and emotional affairs would have happened, sexual affairs would have happened, and it would have just already blown up in the face.
And then all of a sudden, you have even more children’s lives who are basically ruined from the breakup that is, for the most part, inevitable, right? So anyway, you guys really need to consider the consequences. You know, when you’re in this kind of relationship, and you’re having various children, you know, you really need to consider the consequences here. This is why when it comes to marriage, or you know, long term relate committed relationships where there are children, I highly, highly recommend that people have their affection, aka golden pair, or their natural pair, aka the bronze pair. Because in my opinion, those and maybe even the respect pair, and you could even argue like the super ego pair, also known as the refinement pair, those four relationships, you’re going to have a much better chance with child rearing.
Within that context, the other relationships not as much, because there are going to be some emotional compatibility difficulties. However, it’s not as bad within the companion relationship, it’s not as bad, but it’s just that like between an ESTP and an ISTP. So I’m intrigued relationships are better than others. But when you have like an extra X rated feeling child trying to reach out to an F fi demon, or you have an extroverted, feeling inferior trying to reach out to an Introverted Feeling trickster, it’s just a formula for disaster.
And you’re going to have to watch out for that. So anyway, just just be aware of that folks like this is, this is kind of a big deal. And when you’re doing some like family planning, like and I’m not talking like birth control, or condoms here, I’m talking about like actually planning out your family, figuring out who your mate should be those kinds of things. You really, really need to count the cost of having children with someone who is not both sexually and emotionally compatible with you at the same time.
And now the wind is starting to pick up so anyway, folks. That’s it for this question. So thanks for watching and listening and I’ll see you guys in the next episode.
