CS Joseph Responds
Why do people make fun of INTPS about their sexual skills in the bedroom? And how are ENTPs better at it? But before I can answer please consider subscribing to the channel, before I started attempting to convince people that grow goo is the literal best name we could have ever come up with for baby Yoda. Chris Traeger style and hit the alert bell so that you can get notified about when I go live. That being said, What’s up you go hackers. I’m CS Joseph, this is the CS Joseph podcast.
And I’m here to respond to your questions on any topic union analytical psychology, or the four sides of the mind. And the source of today’s question is random private, Facebook, group, etc. And, yes, that’s where this question comes from, but not going to be revealing the specific group or the specific person but I will say that as soon as I saw it, my feet I was like, completely triggered and I’m like, okay, yeah, definitely have to comment on this. So, why do people make fun of intp sexual skills in the bedroom? For one, it’s probably an SE user making fun of them.
And it’s because you know, you know, having sex with an intp is kind of like, you know, I don’t know, some people would probably describe it as having sex with a dead fish. I’m not I’m not even kidding. Actually. I’ve actually literally heard heard that comment from a coaching client.
But yes, the reason why is because out of all of these 16 types, the intp is one of two types that are very contented just lay there. Just just lay there, man, or woman just lay there, there’s there’s going to lay there because macam fi you know, but hey, I mean you know si child that that’s why they do that is because si child because they’re like so much in their comfort zone and it’s not like you know, se heroes completely mind it’s not like, you know, their their golden pairs, their se child really minds because as a child types know, en J’s, you know, the people that are like highest sexual compatibility with an intp or an INFP, basically, are completely fine with their si user just lay there because it’s like, wow, I just have this amazingly blank white canvas, you know, it’s kind of like vanilla. They’re kind of like, they’re kind of like, you know, crackers, you know, or just like an hour or or, or Tostitos, whites, corn, tortilla chips, you know, it’s just like, because, you know, that’s typically what intp is just eat just straight up carbs, a lot. And nothing else.
For days, when playing video games nonstop. Oh, sorry, that was my former intp friend. But But anyway, the point is, is that extroverted sensing trickster, which is what an intp has, is not about performance. And when it comes to sexual performance, they just don’t have any, they really just don’t have any actual sexual performance because it’s not their job to perform sexually.
For other people. It’s actually the job of their en J’s, who they should be in sexual relationships with to take on the role of performer and they are there to receive an experience for someone, they’re there to receive sensation from someone, they’re there to be touched, they’re there to be manhandled and fondle, then all sorts of different things. They are there. And the reason why as a child, their golden pair now with like an INTJ, for example, really likes this is because they completely get off, they get off sexually, by by every single individual reaction to that the intp does, like every little touch that they make, or anything that there’s like a reaction, and they love how hyperreactive Introverted Sensing child is, which ultimately gets the E and J male or female, like completely aroused and totally going all out from a sexual standpoint with their intp.
And it’s really important. The reason why is because ENT J’s, for example, especially, but especially E and TJ women, they have a very hard time reaching orgasm, they have an extremely difficult time reaching orgasm. It’s not like someone can just pleasure them and all of a sudden they have orgasm, it’s just it just doesn’t really work that way for them. They’re the ones that reach orgasm through pleasuring somebody else.
Right. And that’s, that’s the thing. Like if you’re looking at an expert sensor, they are the pleasure and the introverted sensor is the pleasure ie basically, within a sexual relationship, typically now through cognitive transition, let’s say if like both these people got drunk, then a drunk intp could actually take on the sexual performance standpoint, because their Trickster is unlocked as a result of being drunk. And they’re basically having sex via their en TJ shadow or also known as unconscious.
It’s cetera. So that’s another thing to consider. I mean, mind altering substances or mind altering states can actually change the side of the mind that a person utilizes when they’re performing sexual acts, etc. But by and large, most people consider intp sexual skills to be so vanilla or completely non existent, that it’s just not really a thing.
And a lot of intp is out there, their Fe inferiors, they get really hurts when they hear that and they don’t like receiving that kind of criticisms was like, Wow, no one actually values me in that area, you know, so what they end up doing is that the, I often see you know, I NPCs, like imp women getting into pole dancing classes, for example, or, or even classes that are related to Kama Sutra, etc, just so they can actually learn because like, like, take their gold Baron emJ sexual prowess is just a natural skill to them. They just naturally have sexual prowess, all n J’s naturally have sexual prowess. But NPWS. However, over time, especially an intp, and especially an INFP.
They it’s a learned behavior, sexual prowess is learned. It is not the fault that is not natural. It’s not innate, it is not inborn to these people, psychologically, etc. So they have to learn those skills over time.
So if an intp has been heavily criticized by their lack of sexual performance, or lack of their sexual prowess, because they’re usually just laying there, usually, that doesn’t mean that all intp so that way, but the intp is that aren’t that way are probably people who have been criticized for it. And because they’ve been criticized for it, they’ve actually gone out of their way to study and gain additional resources to gain that necessary experience that they need to actually be able to contribute in that area. And which is great. It’s nice when, when intp is doing that, especially also when they you know, go to the gym for similar criticism, which, which, for some reason does not often happen.
But I’m always amazed to see intp is in the gym, actually putting their effort and actually learning how to get it done. Which, which is great. I think it’s I think it’s absolutely fantastic. So, but anyway, just understand that these are some of the challenges the sexual challenges the intp is can have is because of extroverted sensing trickster, they lack that natural sexual performance because sexual performance comes from se, or it becomes from expert sensing, and they have se trickster.
So they have to, through self discipline, learn how to do it with their Introverted Sensing child. However, they don’t really have to because if they’re with their golden pair, or if they’re with an NJ, the NJ doesn’t mind at all, if the INFP is lacking in sexual experience or lacking in sexual prowess, because they want to be the ones that bring all the prowess to the table anyway. So it kind of is a moot point. So what probably happened is that this intp, who people make fun of for having lack of sexual prowess, he probably made a mistake was having a sexual relationship with a fellow si user, because that fellow si user, like say, if it was an SI user woman who was screwing an intp man, she was probably criticizing the intp.
It’s like, let’s assume she was like an ENFP or an ES TJ have some kind or an ISTJ. And she probably accused the intp of being bad in bed. The thing is, though, is that she’s expecting an extroverted sensing performance to her given to her in the bedroom. But mentally, the intp is not built for that they’re built to receive the experience too.
And you have two people receiving the sexual experience at the same time, which literally equals bad sex. If you want to learn more about like how to prevent this, I highly recommend you watch the season five playlist here on this YouTube channel. Check that out, or I recommend you get a journeyman membership with us at CS joseph.ly forward slash members and watch season 14 which talks about sexuality or go to CS joseph.ly forward slash portal and then whatever type you are grab a discover package just to like, if you’re nice TJ just do discover dash eyes TJ and gate access that’s like 37 bucks. And then you get access to like your golden pair lecture, etcetera, which is private.
It’s a private lecture that you can have for like a one time fee. And it will teach you kind of how sexuality works, you know, for your type at between your type and your golden pair type, etc. Which I find actually really, really valuable. And many people that I’ve coached, I’ve given them these resources, and they’ve reported that they they’re having like the best sex of their life and they didn’t even know it was possible, which is, you know, utterly fantastic.
But enough of that. There is one other question that is attached to this particular episode though, and it’s like how are en TPS better at, you know, sexual prowess and sexual performance than an intp And this is this is actually a question that I’ve often received, you know, as an ESTP. Because like, I am an intp. And the thing is, though, is that like, there was somebody recently, I actually enjoyed a comment in the CS Joseph, Facebook public group.
And it was from Andrew Nicole an INTJ. And she has si demon. And she’s talking about how she had this time in her life where she was like sadomasochistic, etc. And I was really fascinated by by that because when you actually apply that to sexuality from the point of view of an INTJ, you can see how Introverted Sensing demon naturally is sadomasochistic.
It really is because introverted, sensing deem is very self destructive, and it gets it it becomes self destructive when it’s lacking in other people’s attention. And that’s where these n j’s are really getting off in the bedroom is when they know that they have their partner’s attention. And they’re able to keep their attention and able to harness their attention, which just literally just causes their brain to explode. And then they have like orgasm, etc.
You and I’m saying and that’s literally where that comes from. And it’s all about cultivating and wielding and molding and and sending and receiving and it’s all about attention management. Basically, in the bedroom to these inch extroverted sensors, expert sensors want to create and cultivate attention in their lovers, etc. Well, when you’re sadomasochistic with Introverted Sensing demon, it’s really really important, you know that when you’re having a sexual experience.
In the case of an SI demon, you want to be with an SE demon basically. And the best example of an SE demon to si demon sexual relationship that I have ever seen in popular culture is none other than 50 Shades of Grey, absolutely, hands down. Because Christian gray isn’t en TPS NE And TP like me. And his approach with expert sensing demon, it’s just it really allows him to just let loose in the bedroom let loose upon honest as Anastasia Steele, basically, who is an INFJ technically, and that’s one of the best portrayals of the pedagogue sexual relationship between the two types.
But or at least in terms of SE, inferior to si inferior, etcetera, or se, demon to si demon, etc. But all the bases are basically covered within, like even in the films and I have read the books and I very much enjoyed the books, I particularly like gray, which is the perspective written from the perspective of Christian Grey, although I wish it was a little bit more accurate from the end point of view, but I don’t think the author is completely as aware of it as much as she would hope to be aware of it. And showing that you know, Christian Grey is representing the feminine ideal of what a man should be having all the Alpha seed or the really good fit DNA, as well as all of the the beta provisioning, and him being rich and powerful and having status etc, all combined to one man, which is what Christian Grey is, and NTPs can definitely reach that provided, they’ve taken on those learned behaviors, and they’ve had self discipline to be able to reach that standpoint for themselves. But again, his red room of pain represents just him letting his introverted or his expert sensing demon completely loose, and an eye and Jays are completely down for that they’re completely down for that, because as as it was pointed out earlier, that’s that innate sadomasochism, that’s attached to the Introverted Sensing demon, which is absolutely fascinating as a result, you know, because I mean, I’ll admit, you know, I like using a cane, it’s good times, it is really good times.
But, you know, I mean, se demon is there and being able to utilize every, all of your four sides, your mind or each of your cognitive functions in a sexual situation, regardless of which slot they are in. And that really allows someone to have absolute total sexual freedom and absolute total freedom of expression. It’s just that ENTPS, they’re really good at utilizing the rake and the CO cat seductive styles simultaneously. And based on that seductive style, oftentimes, while they’re not really doing as much in terms of sexual performance, the entire experience has been constructed in some type of like cat and mouse game, which makes it super fun for the extroverted sensor that is involved with the intp sexually, and that’s why en TPS ended up getting a much better rap when it comes to Not receiving as much criticism when compared to intp.
Because an ENTP still has their se demon. And while it is while it is technically a lower function than the extrovert sensing trickster of an intp, that’s like the intp thinks that they’re aware of giving someone a really good experience, and they’re really going out of their way to do it, and trying to perform, whereas the extrovert sensing demon just doesn’t care if it performs at all, it just really doesn’t care. And because it’s so uncaring, it makes the EMTP look like it’s this dark triad psychopath narcissist, Machiavellian, which in turn causes the E and TP regardless of male or female to be far more sexually attractive in a sexual situation anyway. So like, it just ends up working out for the E and TP better.
Whereas the intp it really doesn’t. It just it just doesn’t in that way. But again, it doesn’t matter. It really doesn’t matter.
I’m not here saying that I NTPs are better than DNTPs at sex or vice versa. I am not saying that that’s not true. What I am saying is it’s important to be cognizant of these things. Because when you are in sexual relationships with people, you need to aim to be in sexual relationships with people who are compatible with you.
Because as a result of that, you don’t have to deal with any of these insecurities. I mean, going back to the to the INTJ, who spoke about sadomasochism, for example, when like, if I was in a sexual relationship with an INTJ, let’s say, like, we were on a day, you know, we we hadn’t had sex yet. But we both knew that it was coming. It was coming that night, but you know, she would be like super insecure, she’d be like really afraid, oh, man, I don’t really want to fail.
You know, what if he doesn’t like it? What if I’m not good enough? What if I don’t perform well, and he’s just gonna go to some other woman etc. And she has all these feelings. And it’s one of the reasons why INTJ is often think about sex more often than having sex because they have this inborn performance anxiety about them. But from my point of view, it’s just like what I like to do, you know, go up to the INTJ come up behind them while they’re doing something else, and then just hold them really close whispered in the ear and be like, hey, you know, no one makes me more comfortable or more safer than you.
I think it you know, when it comes to the bedroom, it’s impossible for you to fail, it literally is impossible, you’d fail. And that’s the thing about how awesome si inferior is because in a sexual standpoint, when it comes to any Fe user, regardless of what s user they are, you know, especially in se inferior, it really isn’t possible for them to fail, they really can’t do a bad job. And over time, based on how sensitive the Introverted Sensing inferior is within the ESTP, and being able to provide their reactions in real time, it’s so easy for the INTJ to instantly adjust their strategy, or they can even become tactical with their ESFP subconscious within the bedroom. And then as a result of that, as a result of that, they they are able to reach success to the point where they themselves feel satisfied within their own ego, that they did a good job in the bedroom, and that they performed well.
And then they’re like, Okay, yes, I can anticipate loyalty from this EMTP or they’re, they’re at least going to stick around, I can maintain and keep and cultivate and mold their attention. While I feel really good about myself, I did a really great job. And the only person that really gives that INFJ the opportunity to do that is an ENFP in that moment, because this is literally how this works. Anyway, guys, the bottom line is when you’re having sex with somebody have sex with somebody who is sexually compatible with you, I recommend golden or silver, or bronze sexual compatibility, that’s the best stick with those pedagogue still counts as Golden sexuality, because it’s an INFJ still, because remember, guys perception functions is where sexuality is.
So if you want to have the best sex or life, make sure you doing these things and doing it this way. To find out more again, watch season five, or the season 14 episodes throughout our members portal, et cetera. And you’ll get that all figured out. So if you want a guaranteed answer for your questions you want to get in on videos like this.
Consult with the wizard. Yours truly at CS Joseph dot life forward slash wizard and post your coaching question there and you will get a video response from me Be it publicly here on YouTube or privately directly to your email, depending on which option you choose. So anyway, with all that being said, Folks, I’ll see you guys tonight