Season 2, Episode 9 Transcript


Chase: Hey, guys. It’s Chase with again. So today we’re going to be talking about the interaction styles yet again. This is the fourth and final video on interaction styles, and the specific interaction style we’re going to be talking about today is the behind the scenes types. Behind the scenes are very interesting, and in some cases very mysterious, although most would say that the ISFJ is very common to be mysterious, but it still is.

Chase: So, anyway, the four types that are the behind the scenes are the ISFJ, the ISFP, the INTP, and the INFP. The behind the scenes type … Very shadowy individuals, always sneaking around, always in the background, never really actually up front, although that’s not necessarily true. They go under their unconscious or their subconscious and be out front if they have to be, but that is basically any type that is an introvert, anyway.

Chase: So, the interaction style of behind the scenes … They are informative, they’re responding, and they’re movement. Now obviously they’re responding, because responding basically means they’re introverted and we already knew that they’re introverted. They like it when people come to them. It takes them a little bit more mental energy to initiate, and it’s oftentimes why they like to be left alone, because social interaction can drain them if it’s prolonged.

Chase: It’s not that they don’t crave social interaction, but it’s because it’s draining. My own mother, for example, she’s an ISFJ, and when she’s in social situations what she does is she has what she calls a cup of personality. It’s basically coffee. She gets hopped up on coffee and then she becomes Chatty Cathy. Well, caffeine is a stimulant for in ISFJ that basically removes inhibitions, kinda similar to how alcohol does in some cases, and it puts the ISFJ in their ESFP shadow, or their ESFP unconscious side of their mind, which makes them very ESFP-ish, and if they’re in a crowd, they can become the life of the party pretty quickly, but only for a limited time, at least as long as the caffeine lasts.

Chase: If they’re in a one-on-one situation, though, they can go into their ENTP subconscious if they’re comfortable enough for it, and they can really wow some people with very personal and powerful conversations. Those ISFJs, all because of their interaction style. So, they are responding.

Chase: They’re also control, control being, as we’ve talked about, you go at your own pace. We’ve been discussing movement a lot, and we initially talked about control, but let’s reiterate control a little bit, at least in terms of the behind the scenes. You go at your own pace. You take your jolly sweet time. You’re not really in a hurry. You don’t like to be forced to be in a hurry. You like things to be under control. For an ISFJ, INFP, INTP, ISFP, really social control is a big deal to them because they’re responding, but system control is also really helpful as well, especially with ISFPs, because they need to have that freedom. If they don’t have control over their freedom, if they perceive that they have control in their freedom for decision making, then it’s really just going to go downhill for them, really quick.

Chase: Why is that? It’s because ISFPs are like super diligent, but if they don’t have control of their freedom, they’ll decide that they’ll become instantly lethargic in such a way where they become super, super lazy, right? INFPs are very similar to that as well. If they feel like they lack control in their situation, and that in any social situations, it could be their relationships, it could be their job, then they have this whole point of view of, “Well, why bother? It’s not gonna change any better for me, so why should I care to put in any effort to begin with?” But then again that becomes a catch-22 when they get their little why bother syndrome, because then nothing changes and because they’re miserable, because they’re FI hero, they end up making all the FEs in their life miserable, too, and it just spreads like a virus. It’s not ideal and I don’t recommend it.

Chase: So, control. They take their time. They go at their own pace. They’re not in a hurry. It can be really useful. ISFPs, when they have control over their destiny, control over their freedom to the point where it’s defended and it’s not gonna be taken away from them, they really can spend a lot of time being absolutely precise with their art and create some amazing art. There’s a lot of examples around that do this. I was actually introduced, not face to face, but I was introduced to an ISFP makeup artist recently. I met a family member of theirs on an airplane recently. They own this company called Beautiful Buzz, for example, and it’s an example of an ISFP entrepreneur who’s starting makeup lines or clothing lines and whatnot, but because she’s going at her own pace, she’s taking her time, she’s really spending all of her attention on the details and focusing on the details in that way, it’s able to create amazing visuals and really deliver a good customer experience, a very good artistic approach, because an ISFP’s all about delivering the best experience with how they feel, because if they don’t deliver a good experience, they don’t feel good about the experience they’re giving, because they may lack the freedom to do so, that’s just gonna cause drama, not just for them personally, but also for their customers. So I wouldn’t recommend that.

Chase: The sun is not helping here. Oh, well. Yeah, so responding, control, and informative. That’s the difficult part about the behind the scenes types. They get so cryptic sometimes and you have to decrypt, and it goes down to the whole bias towards women, I guess, where people think that all women are not able to be direct about their feelings or you have to decode what they’re saying. It brings about situations like, “I didn’t want you to solve my problem, but I just wanted you to hear how I feel.” Something similar like that, that’s a very informative way of doing things, although for some reason that’s been attached to women, but not all women actually do that. Maybe only half of women do that, and yet somehow our race or people in our society, we’ve just attached that to people and it’s really annoying, and it’s not true. Not good, so …

Chase: But, yeah, there’s always subtext attached to everything that any of these behind the scenes types say. You have to know the context in order to really understand what it is they’re saying. So if you’re direct, you don’t really care that much about context, but if you’re in a relationship with a behind the scenes type, you need to know context in order to basically have a relationship with them, because the context could change, and you just don’t know. You really don’t know, so … It’s especially important for all of them. So I say the Si types because they have Te inferior, makes them insecure about what other people think of them. Also makes them insecure about rules, regulations, afraid of too much structure, right? Or afraid that the structure that exists is unfair to them or something they don’t like, and they’ll try to complain, and it’s all just a series of hinting, instead of directly telling you that there’s a problem, right? And then they get mad at you for not reading their hints, and then they start making decisions about you, start judging you because you’re not reading their hints right. So, you gotta be careful. Don’t do that.

Chase: Also, one thing about behind the scenes types. Always respect the behind the scenes realm. What that means is, if you have someone who is a behind the scenes main or ego, or a behind the scenes subconscious, respect the behind the scenes realm. Allow these people to live in the shadows. Do not expose them, especially in public, because they’re very private people, and if they share things with you, compared to others, you have to assume that that’s because you’re special. That’s because they have a special relationship with you. If you expose them, or talk about things about them or with them in public without their permission, they’ll hate you for it. They’ll feel disrespected. They’ll feel unloved, and that’s a problem.

Chase: You gotta be careful. You have to allow them to be as private as possible, and you just have to make them be comfortable in that private area. Now, the ISFP would claim that, “Oh, I don’t mind that. I don’t mind.” But reality they do because they’re insecure about how other people think of them because of TE inferior. ISFJ would claim, “Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. That’s fine.” But deep down they’ll remember and they’ll hold it against you later. In fact, all of the behind the scenes types will hold it against you later. They just will. Even the ISFP and they’re an SE user, it’s because that SI critic just really remembers all the bad things, and that’s all it remembers, and it will bring it up many years later.

Chase: Now, it’s not as bad as SI hero or SI child, which are the other behind the scenes types, but it’s pretty rough, let’s be honest. So, yeah, they’re informative, you gotta watch out for their hints, you gotta decrypt what they say. They’re responding. Allow them to be responding. Respect the behind the scenes realm with their responsiveness. You can measure if they’re in the mood or not, or how comfortable they are … You have to measure either/or or both, depending on which type you’re dealing with, so just allow them to be in that behind the scenes realm. They’re there because it’s safe, it’s warm, it’s comfort, it’s comfortable, it’s known, they’re used to it, especially the INPs. INPs it’s crazy. They get so comfortable with where they are that they get stuck in ruts and then they end up not growing because they get stuck in ruts.

Chase: A lot of people say, like for example, there’s this ENFJ guy on a discord server today that I was talking to. He basically said that people sometimes their MBTi type claim that they’re INTPs and use it as a crutch to not get anything done or not to go anywhere in life. To be honest, that’s not how that works. INTPs just get too comfortable, and really the only way to motivate an INTP or an INFP because they have Si child is to just make them uncomfortable, and to pull them out of that behind the scenes realm. So, in general respect the behind the scenes, but if they’re not growing as people, if they’re not becoming better human beings, be prepared to pull them out of the behind the scenes, be prepared to expose them, because it’s the only way they will grow. They only understand pain. It’s kind of like those people who have to hit rock bottom before they ever grow up, right? Well, that’s true with basically all of the types, to be honest, but some more than others, and I would say that the behind the scenes types are definitely that way, with the exception of the artist, because it’s the odd man out in some cases.

Chase: The artist will just remain diligent and is perfectly fine left to his own devices. Like it’s very normal, for example, ISFPs that are middle-aged, for example. These people will literally be okay with their husband or wife leaving them alone, and not seeing them for like once every 90 days, so they can continue to work on their projects, to work on their art, basically, because their art is so important to them. Their art is everything to them, so …

Chase: So, informative, responding, control. They go at their own pace, they need to feel in control, either of their own destiny or their environment, so that they can stay comfortable or have the freedom that they need. The freedom is mostly for the ISFP, though. The other ones it’s all about comfort and being in their comfort zone, so …

Chase: I think that’s basically about it, because we’ve hammered the other interaction styles so much that it’s kind of repetitive at this point, but just wanted to at least make the one major point about respecting the behind the scenes realm, because the behind the scenes types are very private people, and they really, really value one on one relationships, also known as introverted relationships. An extroverted relationship is three is a crowd, but a person alone or a person with one other person is still, and two people like, basically, that’s still an introverted social situation, and they really thrive in those introverted situations, when they’re by themselves or with one other human being, but you put them in a three’s a crowd scenario, their privacy and them being private is at risk, and it makes them uncomfortable, and they won’t be comfortable for long in that situation.

Chase: I recommend navigating that as wisely as possible, but the behind the scenes people also get a really bad rap because of that. Often they are derided as people who are just in their own world or don’t care, especially the intuitive of the behind the scenes types, but the sensing behind the scenes types, not so much. They’re really only mysterious because they generally don’t interface with people as often. That’s not a bad thing. It doesn’t mean that we should be labeling them hermits or these people who are not good with human beings, etc. Especially INTPs, people are just not as much of a priority to them, because they’re too busy playing with their metaphysical systems. You know, it’s like a big toyland universe that they have access to, mentally, that they’re able to use their thinking models and solve problems. Life to them is a giant puzzle box. Let them play with their puzzle box. They really need that.

Chase: And sometimes even in a social situation, behind the scenes types, they just have to straight up disengage. I was talking recently with an INTP mother, who’s actually very good at type, and she trained her son or her daughter, I don’t remember which … But she’s married to an ESTP and they go to church and get involved in church events, and she’d be extroverting in her unconscious or her subconscious side of her mind at that point, and then all of a sudden, she’s like tapped out of energy and she just has to completely disappear and people are like, “Where did she go? Where did she go?” And you’ll find her in a corner where there’s like nobody but her, literally doing nothing but playing puzzles. That’s just how INTPs are. INFPs are also very similar. They just want to sometimes disengage, go off alone, be in that private, comfy area, to regain their mental energy from all that extroverting drain that they’ve had, and they just sit there and they daydream. INFPs are all about daydreaming.

Chase: So, because they’re daydreaming so much, that’s how they’re able to regain that mental energy. ISFJs in those situations, they’ll just leave early and go home, because their Si hero really has a hard time with that physical environment because of Se nemesis, they just worry about that physical environment around them and all the people in it, and that worry just bothers them, so they have to kinda disengage entirely, and go to a place far away, preferably their home to gain that level of comfort and that mental energy back, unless, of course they’re trying to use alcohol or caffeine to change that. Who knows? And ISFPs are constantly looking for the opportunity to go back to their art, so, anyway. I think I’ve beat a dead horse a bit too much on this one.

Chase: That’s the final interaction style, the behind the scenes types, and that is informative, responding, control, and we got one more video to go with this series on how to type yourself and others. How to type anyone, basically, so we’ll be going over that in the next video.

Chase: If you found this video to be educational or helpful, please leave a like and subscribe, and if you have any questions or whatnot, ask it in the comments and I will do my best to get back to you. Otherwise, you have a good night. Later.

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