Welcome to the CS Joseph podcast. I’m your host CS Joseph, not like you guys knew that or weren’t expecting that. But hey, I mean, why not? Why not just, you know, tell the truth as is, especially since like I have all these crazy notifications going on in the background. So we’re gonna exit out of that application.
So it doesn’t bother us during this recording again, it’s not like I’m going to restart the recording just why the hell would I do that? No expert sensing demon for the win. Anyway, today’s question, How can an INFP and an ISFP have a better friendship? This is actually really good questions. We’re probably gonna go a little bit deep here. But these are two Introverted Feeling heroes.
This is like the axis of delusion. We’re going to call this relationship the axis of delusion and we’re all potentially going to become delusional with each other here right now on this episode. Hashtag was being you know, was banging it out. So anyway.
But yeah, INFP is there the dreamer type, also known as the mystic ISFPs, or the artists type, also known as the druid? How can they have a better relationship? Okay, so what kind of relationship is this actually, it is actually one of the eight sexual compatibility relationships sexually compatible relationships is another way of saying it. And it is known as the Kindred which is also identical to my relationship with Railgun we have a kindred relationship and the Kindred relationship. While it is often hailed as the most difficult of the sexually compatible relationships most difficult with the aid to actually maintain and keep, I’m actually under the impression that the intrigue relationship probably might actually be the most difficult, but the Kindred relationship, it exists to ultimately solve the problem of exhibit preexisting trauma into both people. So these be these people typically become friends or end up in a sexual relationship, because they both have a serious or high amounts of trauma in their life.
And this is also known as trauma bonding, this relationship is based on trauma, bonding more than any of the other eight sexually compatible relationships, right. So that’s, that’s an issue. That is a that is a big problem. But the reason why these relations, this relationship actually comes together, the reason why an INFP and an ISFP would actually come together is because they show each other kindness in a way that other types would not really be able to do.
And the foundation of the Kindred is to who you know, hashtag root word to be kind to each other, it really comes down to kindness. And these two types of people value kindness, above all, because of the trauma that they have in their life it is and that kindness becomes the glue that represents the trauma bond between them, right? That’s ultimately what it is. That’s ultimately what’s being said here, for these two types in this relationship. However, it can be difficult, because they can hurt each other’s feelings very easily.
And they’re not as really aware of the other person’s feelings, the most awareness that they’re going to get is when one person worries that they’re too selfish. And that’s the only time the other person’s feelings are actually going to be considered. Right. So that presents an issue that presents a problem.
And basically, they end up having this perspective that the other person is not really as caring about their feelings, because that awareness of their feelings doesn’t happen that much. So the ego ends up being starved for support, because each of these two types is expecting the other person to provide them support. And really, the only support that each of these types can actually lend to the other is kindness, which forces these two types to have to be as independent as possible, which puts a lot of strain and especially on the INFP because the INFP is affiliative. The ISFP is perfectly fine with being being independent because they’re like a maverick.
You know, they’re they’re very pragmatic, they could do things on their own, they don’t actually need the INFP around, whereas the reverse is not necessarily true. The INFP really does actually would need the ISFP friends around, and that could cause that could cause issues as well. Another thing is that if kindness starts running out, they end up competing for one another, and accusing each other of oh you don’t think highly of me? Or this is not going to work or you’re harming my status. You’re harming my reputation.
You’re always making me look bad. And then they just end up devolving into ti demon. Destroy ain’t one another. So Chris Taylor calls this soft blocking, Chris Taylor maintains.
And this is a, this is a theory that we haven’t really brought out most or actually discussed. But within the eight sexual compatibilities, those eight relationships from all the way from the affection all the way down to the Kindred these relationships, each of these relationships has a tendency of what Chris Taylor calls soft locking, soft locking means they put people are force people to transition more into a certain side of the mind and the Kindred relationship. According to Chris Taylor, soft lock people into their super ego, which means they ultimately end up feeding each other to each other’s demon functions. And you have two ti demons present.
And these two ti demons will basically eviscerate the other person and get insanely judgmental over time. And really, the only way to actually avoid each other’s ti demons with a potential ti demon fight is that they need to learn how to and I can’t believe I’m saying this, they need to learn how to indulge each other’s delusions, basically. And this is ultimately the relationship of delusion because the INFP and the ISFP end up maintaining an air of delusion with each other. And they end up enabling each other’s a delusional behavior, because that’s really the only way to avoid being fed to each other’s demons and without actually hurting each other’s feelings.
And sometimes, the only way that they’re even able to be kind to each other is because they are indulging each other’s delusions and enabling their delusional behavior. Because FYI hero out of all of the cognitive functions available to human cognition, is the most delusional of them all. So they end up, they don’t they end up not only deluding themselves, because an F fi hero will do that naturally on their own, regardless of anyone in their life, they only stopped doing it, you know, as a result of natural impacts from others. Like, for example, the natural paraffin EFA, here was any natural pair, then the delusion ends up going away, and they’re able to grow out of it.
But in this relationship, the delusion actually needs to be sustained. In order to keep these people together in a friendship or a sexual relationship, it’s a requirement, because they have to enable each other and they enable each other through kindness, kindness is the vehicle of enablement within the context of this particular relationship, which really sucks. Honestly, I couldn’t imagine being in this relationship, because I’m walking around and I’m like, I have no idea what is real, I have no idea what the consequences are, ah, you know, and it’s a very scary situation, I would like this relationship is, in my opinion, not very sustainable, and puts both people at extreme high risk, extreme high risk throughout their their life. So, and while I’m not against the Kindred relationship from from a sexual relationship point of view, it would require an insanely high level of maturity, even a much higher level of maturity than like, say, for example, Railgun and AI.
And then also you have to consider this another layer of complexity to it as well. What are these peoples aka grams, because Okta gram also has, has a way of determining additional natural compatibility on top of just their nature, which is, you know, what, which of the 16 types is their type? What is their persona, and that determines their nature ultimately, but you still have nurture to contend with. And Dr. Grande gives us an idea of how to navigate that nurture.
But some aqua grams are more compatible with other Aqua grams and others, and that can also lead to an issue and because of the lack of emotional compatibility within the context of the Kindred relationship, having a compatible Aqua gram is absolutely critical for the success of the friendship or the relationship anyway, right. So it presents these problems and because they have to enable each other’s delusional behavior, that can end up causing problems, obstacles, negative consequences in life. Two, which guess what they will blame the other person for? Right? And think about it, because the ISFP has the virtue in the vise of being, you know, extremely diligent or very idle. The INFP has the deadly sin of sloth, for example, and the living virtue of initiative, right? So the INFP has from a macro temporal perspective, the ISFP has it specific to their nature within their own natures virtue advice.
If you want to learn more about that, please make sure you’re watching season seven playlist here on the YouTube channel or on the podcast listening to it there. Make sure you guys are doing that because it goes hand in hand with actually understanding how both of these types will interact with one another. But here’s the thing if the INFP is being slothful, the ISFP is going to use expert sensing and mere that and then just become idle and they You’re gonna entirely lose hope. When the INFP is leading in terms of initiative, the ISFP is going to be leading in that direction.
But guess what, vice versa, also the same, because then the INFP is like, Oh, dang, I should actually get off my butt. And because the ISFP is, is being insanely diligent, and I can take initiative. So, those dynamics also come into play as well. But it’s an extremely complex relationship, for very, very little, very little benefit.
But like I said, the only way that this relationship can be sustained, is through kindness, kindness in the form of enabling each other’s delusions, which ultimately is dangerous, it is extremely dangerous. Now, the Kindred relationship, in my opinion, is safer amongst introverted, Introverted Feeling pessimistic, as well as Introverted Thinking pessimistic when you have the introverted judgment function. And in a pessimistic slot. The the Kindred is definitely a little bit easier to maintain.
But when you have the introverted judgment function in optimistic slots, and optimistic slots are the hero, the child, the Nemesis, the trickster, you’re looking for a world of hurt if not already, the Kindred is basically a relationship that is a world of hurt, but you’re making it worse for yourself even at that point. So guys be very, very, very careful with the Kindred especially from a sexual relationship perspective. It is extremely risky. It is it is an extremely high risk relationship.
And I would classify it as one of the four fling relationships. Now, is this relationship better for a friendship than a sexual relationship in the long term? I would say? So definitely, I would say so. Because it would help each other sharpen each other’s decision making, but at the same time, like, Is it is it definitely something that build a family on? No, I wouldn’t say so. I would recommend the affection relationship also known as the Golden pair, or the natural relationship, also known as the bronze pair.
And maybe even the silver pair which is the respect relationship as the top three relationships to basically build a family with and then just avoid the Kindred as is one of the four flame relationships. So yeah, I think that just just about covers it from this perspective. So thank you for watching and listening, and I’ll see you guys on the next episode.