CS joseph responds
Welcome to CS Joseph responds, I’m your host chase here to answer your questions on any topic union analytical psychology, or four sides dynamics Railgun. My wife got me this amazing pizza from Blaze pizza. And to be honest, Blaze pizza is excellent. So, as an intp, I really enjoy torturing my audience by eating in front of them, you know what I’m saying? So, today’s question comes from Quora.
And it is how does INFJ lead to maturity and thinking and making decisions? This is, this is an excellent question. I’m very happy to have gotten the opportunity to find this one. So looks like well, Richardson gave a stab at this question. He studied at campus 2020.
He answered last Monday. Okay. So he says, If I understood your question, the way it’s supposed to be understood, my answer is the following INFJ have a great ability of connecting the dots of a particular situation and human behavior, somewhat mostly on the human behavior side, though. Sure, more logical typing create a detailed system and how to make things work.
What are you talking about? Are you saying INFJs aren’t logical? They’re actually some of the most logical of all the types do you even know what you’re talking about Mr. Wall, while an INFJ can create a detailed system how to make people work? Okay, detailed system, no inf j’s are not systematic. They’re actually interest based and more focused on getting a win win. Because they’re aware of what people get out of situations.
They are not systematic at all systematic people focus on doing the best way of doing something. Why an INFJ can create a detailed system wrong on how to make people work comfortable, content, free, not oppressed. Weird, okay. Those abilities can only be given their due importance when an INFJ is living the best example.
You can’t expect people to follow your in detail instructions on how to be more efficient individual if you are not one to begin with. Once the INFJ is living proof of his preaching teachings and insights, only then people be happy to listen to carry on the selfless project that ensures everybody’s content with their quality of life does enhancing their performance relationships, and overall mental physical health. I hope this was the point otherwise, nevermind it? Actually, well, you actually hit it right on the nail. That’s excellent.
So yeah, I’d definitely be uploading that one. But that’s the thing about INFJs like INFJs often find themselves hypocrites, and they they often criticize other people for things that they themselves are guilty. Well, that’s part of being a template or type of template type means you have expert intuition, expert feeling, Introverted Thinking and extroverted sensing and your top four slots of your ego basically, in terms of your functions that Coggan function wise. So based on that this creates a sense of well, immature and immature people creates a sense of lack of responsibility.
So they end up only taking responsibility, if they’re telling other people who are responsible because they recognize the internal hypocrisy of that, but oftentimes, they can get ahead of themselves, where they end up creating this covert contract with life. And it’s like, Hey, as long as I don’t criticize anybody, for them doing bad, I have licensed to do anything bad. This is more of an STP problem, though, and not as much of an NFJ problem. So NF j’s are at least affiliative.
And being affiliative. They’re focused on doing the right thing. Whereas someone who’s pragmatic is just doing what works. That’s the end which are STP.
So STPs don’t necessarily have that issue. But let’s get back on point here. How does an INFJ become mature? Well, first of all, they need to start taking responsibility take responsibility for meeting their own needs, and not expecting other people to meet their own needs. But they also need to stop being afraid of performing badly INFJs have some serious performance anxiety, it’s just it’s the same kind of performance anxiety that INTJ is have because like INTJ is are often accused of thinking about sex more than actually having sex, right.
Whereas the performance anxiety is a little bit different with an INFJ. And that performance since it can actually lead to pride because they’re trying to put up the fact that they’re afraid of performing badly, they come up with pride, which ends up giving them ti child God Complex, which INFJ has become like insanely arrogant noodles, who believe that they actually literally know everything about everything. And it’s really annoying. And it’s only when they humble themselves and they actually realize that they don’t actually know that much than they and they actually allow themselves to fail because their their performance anxiety.
It causes them to be so afraid of failure that they don’t actually get anything done. They can’t even start anywhere in their life. So they end up becoming stagnant and wake up at 40 years old, alone with no family and literally nothing and we’re in the middle of midlife crisis because they’re too scared to do anything about it because they’re so afraid of failure that they end up doing nothing. The thing is, is that INFJs need to realize is that they benefit the most from practice, more than any of the other types.
Practice makes perfect. Not all types benefit from practice. But INFJ is an INTJ, specifically, but INFJs we’re talking about INFJs because they expert sensing and theory can inspire those expert sensing aspirational, where they get rid of their performance anxiety such that they end up outperforming everybody else around them. However, they need to realize that they should stop trading performance for loyalty because for some reason, if Jays think that if they perform well, for others, that means those people be loyal to them at wrong, that’s not always the case.
Right? So they need to stop assuming that. And that’s usually why they’re afraid of failure, because they believe if they fail, other people will stop being loyal to them. That’s another issue because they need loyalty. Because the INFJ greatest fear in life is fear of abandonment, just as much as they have fear of performing terribly, but it’s because they’re afraid of being abandoned, you know, because they take loyalty.
So very seriously, you know, an INFJ. Immature INFJ recognizes that people will come and go, regardless of anything they do, regardless of their performance, and they will allow themselves to be okay with failing, and then they will actually seek failure, because the more often they seek failure instead of success, the more they learn how to fail at something, the more they learn how to succeed at something because they identify the things they shouldn’t be doing versus things that they would want to do, right, which would be to succeed. So logically speaking, they come to realize this, and they’re not trying to cover it up with pride. I think a really horrible example of an INFJ with ti child complex god complex with the recent bachelorette show, where in when they were doing the introductions, the med the INFJ, with ti child god complex with a guy that got on top of the vehicle when he first entered in like roared like a lion, when he first introduced himself to the main girl of The Bachelorette show.
That guy is an INFJ ti child, God Complex, how embarrassing, but you don’t care. He thinks he knows everything you and I’m saying. It’s all about performance. It’s fine, Alex, for it sensing inferior types, especially INFJ.
Women, they like to when they have their ability to perform inhibited by other people, or at least when they perceive it’s being inhibited by other people, they actually go out of the way to eliminate competition with other women. And this could lead to spreading rumors, or it could lead to just trying to get make things bad make that person look bad to get rid of that person. So then they don’t have to be afraid of somebody else performed better than they were, which is really ridiculous. But se inferiors do this all the time.
And that’s an example of immaturity. So, also INFJs have this problem because they have te trickster outside of their performance anxiety, you know, which is solved by just be respectful of failure, and recognize you’re not always going to perform the best. But practice makes perfect. As long as you as an INFJ practice, you will never have to worry with your performance anxiety ever again.
Beyond that, you have te trickster and Te Trickster is basically means INFJs can rationalize everything and immature INFJ is somebody who takes things at face value, and they don’t verify things. So an INFJ ends up being at risk of believing just about anything. This is the reason why INFJs are hippies more than anyone and they believe weird hippie things like hippie culture and new age ism, and these spiritual experiences like Kundalini experiences, or Ayahuasca or all these things, and they think like means something. And because they’re willing to put their beliefs in just about anything without actually verifying, but if they spend time verifying their beliefs, they become more mature.
So it’s really important to do that. And through that verification, they end up becoming a little bit wiser. Another problem that immature INFJs have is that they do not value themselves properly. They’re so critical towards their self worth, that they literally walk around feeling worthless, and it’s like really annoying that they do this, they become so super self deprecating, and way too, over giving other people because they don’t value themselves and are constantly people pleasing and searching for acceptance and hoping other people will feel good about them so that they can feel good about themselves.
Right? Because again, they think that performance means loyalty, that if they perform well that no one’s going to abandon them, which is not literally how life works. It’s a lie that they believe for some reason, you know, so just understand folks like, this is a serious issue. And they just have to let go of that they have to realize that, you know, an INFJ has to come to the conclusion and realize that if they are helping other people, what business what business do they have to complain? Because an INFJ if one person complains out of the many people that they’re helping, then they feel really, really bad about themselves, which technically is a form of pride if you think about it, because how dare they think that they’re so good and so amazing at doing something that they would be perfect every time because INFJs are the resident perfectionist of all the types, they take perfection very seriously. It’s like super annoying.
So anyway, we’re out of time for this particular episode. If you want to learn more, I’m gonna leave a link in description below that goes even way more in depth on INFJ So, if you really want to know how to become the absolute best INFJ go to CS Joseph dot life forward slash Patreon. Become a gold Tier member, and then watch the season season 19 episode that we have there on that menu for INFJs it’s how to cognitively develop an INFJ so you can become the best INFJ and reach the path to enlightenment etc. And check out our INFJ playlist on our other YouTube channel.
You just go to the featured channels for this channel and you’ll see it and you’ll you’ll be able to go to the INFJ playlist, you can check out that playlist I’ll probably leave the link in the description below as well. But if you found this episode helpful and educational, please subscribe to the channel. Leave a like if you have any questions or comments about INFJs please leave it in the comment section below. I read every comment so that’d be great.
So with that being said, Folks, I’ll see you guys tonight