Season 9, Episode 1 Transcript
– Hey guys, it’s CS Joseph with csjoseph.life. Tonight’s video comes from a user request. It is the mentor versus the sage also known as the ENFJ versus the INFJ. I started doing these comparison videos because someone else made a video of me on YouTube and they were claiming I was an ENTJ. So I did an ENTP versus ENTJ video to try to disprove and rebut their argument. However, in this process of doing that, one of our subscribers had asked me to do a video on ENFJ versus INFJ. So this video is for you. Just so you guys know comparison videos like this. I’ve just decided to do these based on user request. I’m not really going to plan these all the way out per se. So if you want me to do videos on them I will definitely do them. And eventually I’ll get around to them but they’re not going to be as high a priority based on the core content that I have. Unless of course you are asking me. I usually take user requests very seriously from subscribers. So just let me know, and I will do my best to get the video out for you as soon as possible. It’s important that I keep this audience well loved cause I love all of you guys very much. And because you spent so much time listening to someone like me, be a talking head with a weird, you know. Well, with one of these, actually. The famous Target whiteboard, if you know what I mean.
So let’s dive in, welcome to the ENFJ versus INFJ. So why is it important to do comparison videos like this? It’s probably because people wake up in the morning, they’re like, “oh, I’m so ENFJ.” And when they get home, they’re like, “oh, I’m so INFJ right now.” And I’m like, no, that’s retarded. Like, it’s seriously dumb. That’s not even true. That’s not how the NBTI works. Sorry all of you people on the INTJ forums who keep thinking that your letters flip. That’s not even real. That’s not even accurate. And if you think that, no, that’s not true because we have this thing called the four sides of the mind, right? So for example, at any time during the day you be in your ego, or your shadow or your superego, or even your subconscious and that has nothing to do with your letters changing. It just means, oh, I feel more introverted right now well that means if you were an ENFJ then that means you’re an INFP or it means you’re an ISTP. I mean, which one, right? It depends. It depends on all the different situations. So that’s not how type actually works. So there is no I’m ENFJ and then I’m gonna go introvert and be INFJ the next day. Like that’s a lie. And don’t believe that. That is like not even remotely relevant or real and has nothing to do with any of it.
Don’t believe me, read John Beebe, B-E-E-B-E. Or is it John Beep? I have no clue, but that guy is one of my sources along with Linda Barrons and Plato. You could define that a little bit easier. So anyway, let’s do a deep dive. So ENFJ’s are in charge. They’re all about being direct initiating control but the INFJ is about being a direct responding movement. They’re known as the see it through types. They are so focused on finishing things but they have a really hard time starting anything. And most INFJ’s would agree with me on that because they’re like, “but I don’t have a degree” or “I don’t have the certification”, or you know. “And because I don’t have these things. I don’t deserve to go for this job.” You know and it’s like, okay, wow guys way to be like, really emo about that. But, if you just apply yourselves regardless of your credentials and just rely on the fact that you have Ti Child which basically usually makes INFJ’s right anyway. Because of how they have this insane grasp on logic but that Ti Child it’s like this pure refined uncorrupted form of truth that INFJ’s carry. That means they could basically think their way through almost any situation which means I don’t care what credentials they have. There’ll be super useful in that role.
And INFJ’s if you’re watching this video, please understand that, like you need to give yourselves more credit. Don’t let FI Critic just kind of eat your faces alive you know, and be like, “oh well I feel useless and worthless.” And then stop doing that. Actually you’re like the most useful. So realize that, that’s true and live your life that way, please for the rest of us, please, please do that. And of course you know ENFJ’s have a little bit harder with their TI. It’s like, “oh, I’m really insecure about what I think. And I’m afraid that I might be wrong. So I have to ask everyone else how they feel about it.” Whereas the IFNJ doesn’t have to ask anyone about how other people feel about their ideas because they already know what their ideas are. And it’s more like they look at people with their ideas and it’s like, “well, why don’t you feel good about my ideas you must be a moron.” It’s a very different approach. It’s not the same as ENFJ’s. You know what I mean? So ENFJ’s are very in charge, whereas INFJ’s are introverted, ENFJ’s gain mental energy by being around other people. INFJ’s lose energy from being around other people and they gain energy through solitude. Whereas solitude drains the energy of the ENFJ, like that’s remotely useful. You know what I mean? Well it is, is because it’s who they are. We have to respect these components of these types. There’s not much we can do about that. So egos the ENFJ they are very all about how other people feel and they feel guilt so much because of Fe Hero.
But INFJ’s very similar, they also can be like totally guilty at things because they have FE Parent. But FE Parent is not as strong as FE Hero. So technically ENFJ’s end up feeling way more than INFJ’s in a big way and like in a serious, big way. And that can be a problem for them. ENFJ’s are really taking charge, they’re focused so much on giving everyone a really good experience at all times. They always wanna make everyone feel comfortable. The INFJ is afraid. They’re afraid of giving people experiences. They’re afraid of their expert in sensing inferior because they’re afraid they’re gonna do it wrong. INFJ’s walk around having this performance anxiety. Whereas the ENFJ anxiety is just in their thinking. It’s like, I’m anxious about what I believe is true. Whereas the INFJ is like I’m anxious about my performance. You know, it’s different guys. It’s not the same, you know, INFJs are very different people. We need to stop thinking that they’re similar. They’re not really that similar at all. It’s just the letters make them look that similar. And they’re like, “oh, okay, I’m a layman. So, because the letters are similar I’m going to assume they’re that similar.” No, they’re not. Yeah, they’re both idealists and very people focused but their priorities are completely different. So ENFJ’s prioritize caring. Whereas INFJ’s prioritize what they want.
Whereas ENFJ’s a little bit more responsible, to what they want. But INFJ’s are very responsible when it comes to grasping social matters and social issues and social justice. In fact, INFJ’s in force fairness way more than ENFJ’s. Why, well ENFJ’s willing to let some things some unfair things happen as long as everyone around them has having a good experience, but not INFJ’s. They don’t care that much about the experience other peoples are having, when it comes to fairness. They’re going to enforce fairness and social justice way more than the ENFJ ever would. Because to them any one person not giving a good experience is not worth it to them. So they’re gonna go with it even further, right. And the ENFJ’s not necessarily going to do that. So we talked about expert sensing and one’s insecure and one’s very childlike about it. We talked about TI. So if the ENFJ gets over its fear then they could become the ISTP subconscious. And like my ENFJ father, he has this thing, his hobby where he like works on scooters in his garage all the time. That’s because his ISTP subconscious is coming out and like I had another friend his name was Chris he’s ENFJ, he mastered golf. He’s one of the best golfers I know.
In fact he’s probably the best skilled golfer I’ve actually physically met and shaken hands with. He’s absolutely amazing. And if he continues to go in the direction he goes, he could definitely be a pro. He’s probably getting really close in his level of mastery of the game, where he could be a pro. And it’s because of his ISTP subconscious. INFJ’s have their ESTP subconscious. And INFJ’s are trying to become the alpha of their group basically. Like kind of have like their own little cult following or their own little disciple friends following them around and whatnot because of their ESTP they’re trying to be the alpha. They wanna be as alpha as possible alpha amongst their peers, you know? And that’s like when sometimes they get jobs that are going nowhere, and they see everyone above them or around them. It’s just like, well, it just breaks them up inside because they wanna be the ones in charge. They wanna be the ones who are leading the pack. They wanna be the ones driving and executing social change, you know. Whereas the ENFJ would just wanna tinker in their shop and have fun all day long playing with things, even if it’s Legos, for example. Cause it engages their crafts.
ESTP wants to be able to persuade. The ESTP wants people to value their thinking, value their wisdom, right? So the INFJ has a lot of wisdom to share but it’s trying to convince everyone else around them to value it. And that’s what the ESTP does. They take charge. They find their followers that will listen to their message, loyal followers. They have to be very loyal and they end up creating their own like little wolf pack or whatever. And then because of that wolf pack, they’re able to, they kind of draw their self-worth from it. Because their FE Parent, their SE Inferior, combined together giving these people a good experience, raising them up. The INFJ’s number one export in life is to create better people to improve them. A lot of people would say the ENFJ’s that way not necessarily. The ENFJ’s just trying to teach people to do better. You know, it’s like give a man a fish he’ll eat for a day, teach a man how to fish and he’ll eat for the rest of his life. ENFJ’s, take that very seriously. And they really wanna be that benevolent teacher in that regards to just, you know teach people and show them the way. And then once they’re done with them they’re gonna move on. INFJ’s, it’s not that way. Yeah, they’ll teach that man how to fish but then they’ll also expect that man, or want that man to follow that INFJ’s teaching indefinitely. They want to keep that person. They wanna keep that person loyal. They go around collecting people like trading cards. They just wanna create this new family, this new following, this new movement, right. That’s what the INFJ is all about. ENFJ doesn’t care that much about the movement. They will get involved, sure. They will be a part of the movement. They’ll even do things to execute the movement.
They’ll even take charge of the movement every now and then but once they’re done, they’re done and they’re moving on. They’re gonna go tinker and do their own thing. They don’t always have to be there up front and center because they just wanna teach. And once they see that person has improved that one little problem that they see in that person, that’s fine. They’re gonna move on to the next one. Why? Cause they’re extroverted. It’s kind of like a one and done situation. Whereas the INFJ it’s more like eternal in a lot of capacities. Provided that those people with the INFJ are actually loyal to them. Cause the INFJ, both types value loyalty but the INFJ values it more. Actually the INFJ needs it more because it’s an inferior function. Whereas the ENFJ doesn’t need it as much. Sure the Se Child is stronger and has twice the amount of awareness as Se Inferior. But they can command attention very easily and get the attention that they want. Whereas the IFNJ doesn’t have that much. So that’s why it’s like a bigger need for an INFJ in that regards compared to the ENFJ. But the trade-off is the INFJ is slightly more intelligent than the ENFJ believe it or not. It’s because the ENTJ is afraid of what they think. Whereas the INTJ or the INFJ always knows what they think.
And it’s this uncorrupted logic, it’s very pure. It can get corrupted though but that’s when the shadow ENFP comes in. Because if the INFJ can be corrupted, it can become depraved because there’s an ENFP shadow in their mind. And that depravity could actually corrupt TI Child eventually and all they’re thinking is based on how they can be more selfish for themselves. And I’m not talking responsibly selfish, because I preach that often. I’m talking like really selfish at the expense of other human beings and FE Parent, for some reason and Se and fear for some reason, just as not aware when it gets to that point where they’re really starting to take advantage of other human beings within their wolf pack. But eventually someone will criticize them. They’ll feel bad about it. And then they’ll course correct. And then the INFJ will no longer be so corrupt because people are calling into question their moral behavior. And as long as the INFJ has someone to call into question their moral behavior or their super high moral standard that just alienates everyone they’ll course correct. Because they’ll realize that they don’t wanna give people a bad experience anymore and they want it be more ethical and focused on justice with their FE and that’s very important to them to do that. ENFJ is having that following, it’s just not that much.
See the INFJ they wanna teach many people, and have that following but the ENFJ wants to teach one, right. It’s really interesting how their priorities similar but different, you know. One’s more extroverted focused. One’s more introverted focused. Yet one’s an expert, yet one’s more introverted and how they do things. It’s so similar but so different at the same time. It’s amazing how our minds work in this way. So, I mean look at how structured it is. Look at all these functions and how they said. If at the theory of evolution was absolutely 100% true then we’d find ourselves in a situation where we’d have more chaotic based cognition yet we don’t, right. So then that’s more of an argument for intelligent design. You know what I mean? And that’s just as a result of the science of depth psychology. It kind of makes you think, you know as far as how deep these functions can go when it comes to these types. It continues to unlock many, many, many, more nuances about human life that we’re not even aware of. So anyway, let’s move on. So we talked about the ENFP shadow a little bit and how it can potentially corrupt and becomes the brave with the INFJ. When it’s not doing that and it’s kind of been a little bit more mature. The ENFJ shadow can actually help the INFJ advocate for the proper ideas in people. And that further helps support their ESTP subconscious to build that wolf pack, to build that following, to build that movement. The INFP with the ENFJ really is more focused on its own internal dream world and bringing that ideal dream world to existence. And that ends up going to the ego. And that really helps support the ISTP. That’s why the ISTP is constantly tinkering and building things and crafting things and developing its craft. Because the ENFJ when it tries to view the ideal world or what the ENFJ believes is the ideal world. It wants to create it and use its craftsman to craft that ideal world.
To manipulate the physical environment, to bring it forth, to make it true, right? It’s not so much about ideas or movement or following or persuading people. It’s about building something that has meaning it’s how like an ENFJ will dream it with their dreamer shadow. And then they’ll think about it with their ENFJ ego, and then they’ll implement it and build it with their ISTP subconscious for the purpose of having a lasting legacy, cause that’s their legacy. Whereas the legacy of the INFJ is the movement basically. Whereas just look at Gandhi, that’s his legacy. Everyone knows Gandhi, right? Whereas an ENFJ like a giant structure or a temple or a pyramid or even a bridge would be the legacy of the ENFJ. I imagine that the, you know, ancient Egyptians, the pyramids an ENFJ probably designed one and had it built. And that is that ENFJ’s legacy was that pyramid, for example cause they really take that seriously. Building a structure that everyone can remember them by cause that’s how Se Child works. Se Child wants people to remember them.
So does Se Inferior, but Se Child really wants people to remember them and to never forget about them and never forget about that amazing experience that Se Child delivered, right. And that’s why they go so far in building those things. So their super egos are very similar. The ESTJ versus the ISTJ both of them can elect themselves, judge, jury, and executioner and take people out in that regard. But the ENFJ does it more from the point of control whereas INFJ does it from the point of movement. Remember the INFJ has to have progress although in order to feel good about themselves to feel like they’re going anywhere otherwise they’re gonna get super depressed. Whereas the ENFJ, they get super depressed if everything gets out of control for them and they need things under control. That’s why they like to have a more solid plan, even though both types as NFJ’s expect others to plan for them. And if they feel good about that plan or if they think that plan is good, excuse me if they think that plan is good, then they’ll implement it and they’ll follow that plan.
But when it comes down to it, you know the ESTJ’s superego is really there to be a task master and just force people to do tasks like with a whip and control as much as they can because to keep things under control. So the ENFJ can be like comfortable in that regard. That’s if all of a sudden, you don’t listen to the ENFJ you don’t give them their day in court. And when that happens, all of a sudden their Te Demon activates to force people to listen to them that’s kind of how their ESTJ superego works. The INFJ is a lot more different. The INFJ is like it’s coming from Se Inferior. Se Inferior is expecting loyalty of the people that the INFJ improves around them. And if that loyalty is not there the ISTJ’s superego will activate, and it will just basically attempt to permanently maim or punish anyone that’s no longer loyal to the INFJ. And cut them off completely. To the guillotine you go basically. All because of that broken disloyalty. Whereas the ENFJ just wants to have its day in court. It just wants to be able to share what it’s thoughts are. It’s not about, you know, loyalty although loyalty is super important to the ENFJ. They still have the point of view that they can kind of find loyalty anywhere. Where the INFJ their point of view is, is that the kind of loyalty that they’re looking for. The super idealistic loyalty is very rare, right?
There’s a rarity to the loyalty, the kind of loyalty that the INFJ is trying to look for that diehard loyalty. Because INFJ is like well, I’m willing to sacrifice myself for you. I’m willing to take a bullet for you. So you better be willing to take a bullet for me. And it’s kind of a covert contract, except INFJ is after a while as they mature. It’s not a covert contract and they’ll actually straight up tell that to their followers or those close to them that, that’s what their expectation is. If it ever becomes a question. But then again, like types like INFP’s or INTP’s, ENFP’s, ENTP’s. Those types usually already get that because of their Si Child and Si Inferior. They want to be diehard loyal to the cause anyway, and that’s how they behave. And that’s why INFJ’s really like NP’s for that reason. So, yeah, I think that just about covers the differences between the two. So remember the ENFJ’s very in charge. They’re focused on direct initiating control. They’re very in control. Whereas the IFNJ is more movement. The INFJ is very quick with making decisions. The ENFJ takes a little bit longer cause they have to spend more time thinking about it. Whereas the INFJ basically kind of knows what they think on it and they just can make the decision right away.
ENFJ’s about you know, trying to bring its dreams into reality and teach other people and leave a lasting legacy that people can remember. Whereas the INFJ is trying to create that movement or wolf pack of followers. So that their message, and their way of thinking is what actually survives the test of time. And definitely similar to Gandhi or other famous INFJ’s. Jesus Christ for example, was an INFJ and we’re still talking about him 2,000 years later, huh? So there’s a reason for that you know. And you can look at amazing structures that ENFJ’s help bring together. You could look at ideas and ways of thinking that INFJ’s brought together but that’s just who these people are, right. So you can see they’re completely different types. They’re not really as similar as we think. Yeah, kind of similar they’re NFJ’s but they’re very different have different goals, different priorities, different needs, different boundaries, right. And different standards even. So based on that, you know, you could see how different they are when you compare the two to each other. So guys don’t be going around saying well, you know “I’m an INFJ, but I feel very extroverted right now so I’m an ENFJ.” No, that means you’re being an ESTP or an ENFP depending on the situation, right. You’re either in your shadow or you’re in your subconscious. It all depends.
So anyway, I think that covers these two types. If you found this video to be educational or helpful please leave a like or subscribe. If you have any questions regarding this comparison leave it in the comment section. Also in the comment section, if you guys have any requests about some type comparisons that you would like me to do let me know. And I’ll put that on my subscriber request board of the different videos that have been requested. I try to mix these videos in with like the main series that I’m working on. Just to keep the content fresh and keep it going and also to make sure that subscribers feel appreciated and that to know that I’m listening to you guys. Cause I am like every day especially like on Twitter and not just YouTube. So anyway, with that probably gonna be doing another video here shortly. So I’ll see you guys tonight.