Season 15, Episode 3 Transcript


– Hey guys, it’s CS Joseph with, doing another episode on explaining the different behaviors of the temperaments as well as explaining the different behaviors of the interaction styles according to Dr. Linda Berens. We’re doing this to help people figure out how to better use the type grid for typing themselves and others, which that’s why this lecture series will be added to that playlist, “How to Type Yourself and Others,” which I recommend you do. Which means it’ll probably be 18 lectures long and then this also have its own playlist. Before I begin on tonight’s lecture, which is season 15, episode three. Before I do that, I just wanna remind you all that we are doing a giveaway. If you want a copy of Dr. Robert Glover’s book “No More Mr. Nice Guy,” which I think everyone and their mothers should read. Just subscribe to the channel here on YouTube, leave a like, add a comment, and you’ll be entered to win. The next time that I will be doing a whiteboard lecture, the name of the winner will be written on the whiteboard and I will announce it as well. So just something for you to be aware of as we continue to grow this channel. And yeah, so that’s this round for this giveaway and then we’re gonna have other giveaways coming up as well including a free coaching session with me in the very near future. So anyway, we’ve been talking about informative versus direct, that was yesterday’s lecture. 


And today’s lecture, although, yes, I’m sure someone’s noticing that I’m wearing the same shirt as yesterday. Actually I own many of the same shirt because I’m an ENTP. I mean, sue me, I wear the same thing every day, just like Steve Jobs. So if I like something, I just buy many of it and then wear many of it, because it’s convenient for me and I don’t have to do that as much but every now and then, ESTJ or an ESFJ would catch me doing that and then give me much a crap about it and then I’ll start doing that less. What can I say? So, today we’re gonna be discussing the difference between initiating versus responding. What does that mean? What does it mean to be initiating versus responding? This is particularly important. I mean, not as much as informative versus direct is important, but also it’s really important to understand the difference between initiating versus responding. So why? Well, from an interaction style standpoint, from the perspective of Dr. Linda Berens, you need to understand if a type is initiating or responding. And this allows you to determine whether or not somebody is a structure type, AKA in charge or someone has get things going, AKA starter, or if someone is truck the course also known as a finisher, or if there are background slash behind the scenes type. How’s that possible? How does that make sense? It’s because the starters and the structure types at the top they’re extroverts. They’re also initiating because their extroverts and the introverts are the responding types, which are the finishers and the background also known as behind the scenes types. I know there’s like tons of different terminology with all this, but kinda have to say it because there’s so many different interpretations mostly because people are trying to like not get sued. So then they try to relabel everything because they’re afraid of getting sued. Well, luckily someone like me as an autodidact can spend time reading about all those crap and then I’m just like, yeah, this person said this and they get credit for it instead of me just trying to take credit for everything like a jack ass. 


Anyway, that’s not the point neither here nor there. Initiating versus responding. So, it really is the difference between introversion and extroversion, quite frankly, but we’ll also look at a specific example, but let’s talk about introversion versus extroversion. What is introversion? Introversion is when an individual requires solitudes to recharge their mental energy. Extroversion is when someone requires being around fellow human beings, preferably more than two human beings at time to gather their mental energy and recharge their batteries, their mental batteries basically. So that’s the loose definition of introversion versus extroversion. And I don’t say extroversion, I say extroversion because that’s the original term coined by Carl Young. That was the original term. And I don’t care about how the dictionary or Webster or whoever decided that it should be extra version. I really don’t care it, I don’t give a damn. What I do care about is trying to be as accurate as possible to the original union way of doing it, which is why I say extra version because his point was is that people need something a little bit extra. And the extra thing that they need is other human beings being around them. Interacting with fellow human beings preferably in a group setting so that their mind can gain the mental energy that they need in order to stay productive, in order for them to continue on what they’re doing for them not to be depressed, for example. It’s because they need to be around fellow human beings. Which is kind of interesting because I’m an ENTP and I’m like the most introverted of all of the extroverted types, because I have an ISF subconscious which means I can be pretty behind the scenes sometimes. And even in a social situation until someone makes me feel comfortable and said social situation, unless I’m the one putting on said social situation. I’m usually actually very behind the scenes in those social situations even though at the same time, hypocritically speaking my mind is also gaining mental energy from that situation. It’s really weird how that works. So anyway, the point is that there’s a lot of different dichotomies and macrocosms and microcosms when it comes to the 16 types and the cognitive functions. So thank God we have Linda Berens who talks about the interaction styles and her interpretation of the temperaments because it’s way closer to the original temperament creator which is like it’s Plato. I mean, I don’t care for accusing me and we all know that. So Plato’s approach to the temperaments. But we’re not talking about temperaments they were talking about interaction styles. So, initiating versus responding. So an introvert requires solitude to gain mental energy. And you see this all the time like when you see an INTP woman go to church, for example with their family and then they just need to be left alone to play games on their phone in a corner. They’re caning mental energy because they’re just so burned out from the church experience or they leave early from church for example, or whatever group setting that it is. It’s because they’re introverted. And they need to be able to have that solitude in order for them to have that mental energy in their life. So, but another way of looking at introversion versus extroversion is that introversion is, still counts in certain situations. If you’re by yourself, it’s an introverted situation. If you are by yourself plus one human being, that’s still technically an introverted situation. It’s when you get three or more AKA, three’s a crowd two to tango and a two to tango situation it’s technically still an introverted situation and the way that a person’s mind is gaining, an introvert can still gain mental energy in a one-on-one situation, but they can’t do it in a three’s a crowd situation. Conversely, even an extrovert when they’re in a one-on-one situation, their mind is still liable for losing energy and they need to go extrovert and be with a group of people. Now, it just also depends on how well developed their other introverted sides their mind is because for a while that can sustain them. One-on-one interaction, it’s just that they’re not drained as quickly because at least there’s at least one human being that they’re around. But it still can be very draining to them. 


So just remember that’s a way to classify extroversion versus introversion because extroversion is three’s a crowd to tango or less one person solely that counsel’s introversion. So that’s just another way to understand it. And the final way of understanding introversion versus extroversion is being initiating versus responding. Which is the actual metric that we’re utilizing in understanding and using the type grade for typing yourself or other people. This is important. And being initiating with somebody means that you’re gonna go up to someone, you’re going to initiate a conversation with them. Maybe it’s because you want to know something you’re missing some information and whatnot, maybe were you just trying to find out some information, maybe they know something, maybe you’re lost or whatever, but you’re not afraid or not concerned about it. You’re not gonna rely on signs. It’s more useful to you to just go up to somebody and ask them for directions. If we’re gonna be using the example for directions. An introvert sometimes they’re in a place they’ve never been before. It would be more useful to them if they are, was like signs and they’re hoping secretly inside themselves, oh, I sure hope there’s a sign that tells me where I can go so I don’t have to initiate with somebody. It’s kind of interesting how that works. Well, that’s actually pretty normal. That’s actually pretty normal for introverts to do that in that situation of trying to find directions. But initiator and extrovert, that’s not gonna bother them. They’re going to initiate with a complete stranger and get the information they need. 


Now, that’s not to say that introverts are not going to initiate with a complete stranger, but it’s outside of their comfort zone. They’ll do what needs to be done just as much as any human being would do what needs to be done. But at the end of the day, it’s still causes their mind more stress to initiate because they’re using their subconscious or their unconscious to initiate in that situation, not their ego. Remember a person’s egos where they are, most of all. So let’s take an actual practical example of what it is to be responding. Let’s talk about INTJ. So INTJ’s they are introverted. I have an INTJ friend who would get so butt hurt or upset if I never like kept him in the loop about things. And if he’s always looking for whether or not, I told him information as soon as I knew, or if I took a long time to tell him things because he’s always expecting me to inform him of things and keep him up to speed because he’s responding and he wants to know that I think highly enough of him and that he is important enough to me that I would at least keep him informed about new developments or things that are happening so that he doesn’t feel left out because as he users, they don’t like feeling left out. Especially when you’re in a friendship situation and the INJ is like hey, don’t leave me out. 


I don’t wanna miss this opportunity or miss this experience that you’re going to have, keep me informed. Let me know about it so that I understand everything there is to know about it, et cetera. And like, okay yeah, sure, that makes sense, but they’re being responding because the INTJ prefers me to basically go to them and give them the information that they need to keep them informed. An extrovert however, if you as an ENTJ, and he wanted to know what was going on, he just straight up, open up a conversation with me on Discord or call me and just be like, Hey, what do you know about this? And then I’d tell them, and then I’m put in the situation of the responder. And that situation, I would respond with my INTJ unconscious, also known as the shadow or I would respond with my ISFJ subconscious and then through responding, the ENTJ would become informed in that situation. And they’re not afraid to initiate with me or take the initiative in that regard. So do you guys see the difference? People prefer to interact and I’ll have to say that introverts can’t initiate. It’s just that they prefer to respond. It’s not to say that extroverts can’t respond, it’s just that they prefer to initiate. It’s primary versus secondary. So if you’re trying to classify someone, you classify them by their ego. When you’re looking at the type grid, you’re looking at them from the perspective of the ego. Because just treat all of those things in the tight grid as egos and you’re trying to identify their ego, which means that’s where they’re mentally or primarily speaking. Majority of the time say 70% of the time during a day that’s very arbitrary, but I’m just using it as an example. Of course, more integrated the person, the less they’d be in their ego and more comfortable in their subconscious or unconscious, maybe in potentially the super ego, for super integrated people, super mature, super wise people but those are very rare. But initiating is very interesting. They take the initiative whereas the responding, they’re able to take the initiative sometimes but they prefer to respond. Like take going back to the INTJ. 


When they’re working on a class project and there’s a class team, they prefer their teammates to keep them informed about happenings with their project and what’s going on with the project for their school. Maybe it’s their capstone project or final project, they would generally expect that their teammates would keep them informed. And they would get mad if their teammates started making decisions without involving them, because they’ve taken the INTJ is opportunity to respond away and they feel very disrespected by that. And that is a problem. Because it’s like, whoa, why didn’t you all make this decision without me? You’re like, so disrespecting me right now, I’m obviously not important here. You know what I mean? But if he was an ENTJ, it wouldn’t matter. He’d just be like, Hey, what decisions are you making? Like constantly making sure that the ENTJ is in the loop instead of hoping or expecting other people to loop them in. That’s the difference between initiating and responding. And if you are initiating, you’re an extrovert. If you are responding, you’re an introvert. So you can look at it either way. If you don’t know if they’re initiating or responding, see if they are obviously introverted or extroverted. If you don’t know if they’re introverted or extroverted, see if they’re initiating or responding. Either way you will get the answer. Either way you will find out. And here’s the best part. Once you identify they’re initiating, you’ve just eliminated half of the types. You’ve eliminated finishers and background. This guy is initiating. That means he’s either structure or he is starter. So you have eight types to work with. And we talked about direct versus informative yesterday and say for the sake of this example, oh wow, he’s direct. Now we know he’s direct. So then we’ve just eliminated four more types. So we know that he’s direct and we know he’s initiating so he’s automatically a structure type. 


So, because he’s a structure type, he’s either an ESTJ, and ESTP and ENTJ or an ENFJ. One of those four types. And then after that, you just have to identify his temperament and you know exactly which one of those four types he is. So for the sake of this example, we know he’s an NT because he’s the ENTJ So ENTJ is the answer. But we’ll talk more in a couple of lectures deeper in this particular lecture series as to how to tell the difference between NF, NT, SP or SJ for the temperament. There are specific additional dimensions and tools that you can use to determine that. But for the sake of this lecture, we’re just focusing on initiating versus responding. So, a lot of it can be said about comfort level, some people just prefer to interact with other human beings. And again, it’s just all preference, this is all preference. Interaction styles, as much as temperaments is all about preference and it’s like, okay, do you prefer to initiate, do you prefer to respond? It doesn’t mean that you can’t initiate. It doesn’t mean that you can’t respond. It’s just what you prefer to do. That’s the difference. That’s literally the difference. It’s all about preference. Like, I’m right-handed so I prefer to use my right hand even though technically I’m not, I’m actually left-handed although I do a lot of things with my right hand so I’m not ambidextrous, I’m like the other one where I can use like each hand has its own assigned task that it does. INTJ is right now are snickering when I said that great guys, real mature. Anyway, so, with that being said, initiating versus responding. Initiating means you’re an extrovert, responding means you’re an introvert. It’s making sure that you’re looped in, that’s initiating. Hoping that others or make or hoping that others loop you in instead of you making sure that you’re looped in primarily speaking, then you’re responding because you would rather have people come to you instead of you going to other people. It’s a difference between desiring to ask a human being for directions, talking to one of the locals for the natives about, Hey, where can I find this thing versus hoping that there’s a road sign that you could read so you could figure it out on your own without having to initiate with somebody you don’t know. That’s the difference between initiating versus responding. 


So anyway, that finishes up this lecture season 15, episode three, for the behaviors of interaction styles versus temperaments. If you found this lecture useful, helpful, educational, enlightening, insightful, and however many other adjectives we could shove into that, please subscribe to the channel here on YouTube and also on the podcast. If you have any questions about any of this material, leave it in the comment section and I’ll do my best to answer and also leave a like, because I like likes. Likes are dope. They are the dopest. Also, if you have not joined the Discord server yet, join the Discord server, we’ll be doing live Q and A and I’ve been actually pretty active on it, answering questions pretty well recently, So that’s kind of cool to see the community is growing. We’re about to break 300 people in the community, which is awesome. The Discord community that is and I’ll actually be doing probably some giveaways as well during the actual Q and A sessions through the Discord. So if you want to get it on that, definitely get on the Discord. And if you haven’t joined our meetup group cause you’re in the bay area or want to be in the bay area media group, also joined that to both links to the meetup and the Discord are in the description of this lecture. So awesome. And don’t forget our giveaway, well, remember subscribe to the channel, leave a comment, leave a like, you’ll be automatically entered in for this round of the giveaway which is, “No More Mr. Nice Guy” by Dr. Robert Glover. And then eventually we’re probably going to be giving away a bunch of Linda Berens books as well. So awesome. Got a big day ahead of me tomorrow, so I don’t know if I’ll be back tomorrow night or not, but if I am, great. So I’ll see you then.

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