cs joseph responds
How do you know your INTP really wants to understand you, but before I can answer, please consider subscribing the channel so that corrupt affiliative people of the world stop thinking that just because they’re seeking out to do the right thing, that they end up being entitled to having authority and doing the right thing and having authority literally have nothing to do with each other. And also click the bell so that you guys know when I go live, that would be fantastic. That being said, what’s up? You go hackers. This is the CSJ podcast and I’m CS Joseph here to respond to your questions, all things union analytical psychology or the four sides of the mind.
And the source of today’s question is, you know what, it’s basically a fake name. So I’m not really going to say who asked the question because I don’t reward fake names, and I like people will use real names. That would be nice. I’m tired of the INFJ pseudonyms.
I’m really tired of them. Please stop. Please. Please.
Landy, female intp Empath, they care enough to ask about your feelings and willingly sit through your emotional package. If you have one. They would ask about your this is great if you have one, because this is the Lian D here is like hey, by the way, that means I don’t have an emotional package, which means I am completely open to the fact that you might not have one either. That’s fantastic.
I love intp. So they have that attitude. Someone needs to like give them a high five for that. They would ask about your perspective on the subject or anything in discussion, they might be a bit straightforward about how they don’t see things fit or make sense well said.
Not that they doubt your feelings, they might have a different experience on the subject and struggle to piece your story together. That’s a sign they are trying to really understand you. Yes, I’m avoiding that good response. Toby Grandjean Community Support Specialist at Tresco.
No idea what that is. That’s usually very simple. If an intp spends time with you, they want to get to know you preach it. If they aren’t interested, they aren’t interested.
Another surefire method. If they ask you questions, which are not related to whatever project you’re working on, then they are curious about you, and kind of but we’ll talk about that still going up vote. So how do you know when your intp really wants to understand you? So let’s, let’s actually discuss that a little bit. So it goes all the way back to my episode here on this YouTube channel in the playlist, season seven, Episode 15.
What is the virtue and vice of the intp. And in it, I actually use a movie example to demonstrate this between the intp and a man and the ENTJ woman, et cetera. But it still goes both ways. And the virtue advice of an intp is being completely and totally attentive or completely and totally apathetic.
Okay, apathy, right? So that’s the virtue advice of an intp. So here’s the thing, you want to you want to know if you’re, if the intp actually wants to understand you, it really comes down to how much attention that they’re giving to you. But it’s not just that because like, you know, if an intp likes you for like the sake of a relationship, if they’re giving you tons of attention and sharing your attention, kind of like an INFP would, you know, but it goes a little bit deeper than that. Some of the answers provided on Quora actually discuss how intp is, are asking questions a lot, well, they’re being attentive to things that they normally would not be really attentive to.
So if you’re in a relationship with an intp, or you’re friends with an intp, your chances are you have an extroverted sensing function, your top four functions, which means you’re you know, what the intp is patterns and habits are on a regular basis. And if they’re trying to understand somebody, you’ll notice that the kind of attention that they’re leaving towards somebody will be going outside of their normal pattern or outside of their normal habits. They’ll be asking questions they don’t typically ask, they’ll be taking on actions they don’t typically do. They will also be including people or excluding others, or maybe even getting to the point where they might actually invite somebody to something that they wouldn’t typically do and it really comes down to they’re probably running an experiment on the person in their head.
Or they’re actually literally trying to get to know somebody legitimately Okay, now even that I got an intp friend, his name is Angelo and I kinda regret I haven’t texted him in like two weeks. I feel bad about that. But like everything in my life has been completely on fire. But don’t worry, the fire has been put out mostly.
So it’s all good, right? So I’m going to be reconnecting with him tomorrow and make sure that he’s okay. And be like, Yo, bro, sorry. I didn’t mean like goes to like that. It’s not about that.
I just literally like I’ve been on another planet, you know, working on my new website and doing all the web development myself because I just have to do it myself. got burned, trusting other people do in the past, not doing that ever again. But anyway, the point is, you know, it really comes down, it really goes to like, where are they focusing all of their attention? And are they adding a new things that they wouldn’t typically do with their attention. And that’s really how you know if an intp is trying to understand somebody, or you basically, and again, like, if you’re in a sexual relationship with an intp, you generally have an idea of what their habits are, basically.
And then as a result of that, you’ll see that they’re kind of going outside of their typical consistency or their typical habits. And that’s how you know, something’s changed. That’s how you know something’s up. And he kind of got to watch them, you know, kind of got to watch where they put their attention.
Basically, it’s really important that you follow their intention, if they’re just going through the motions, if they’re, if they’re treating you the same way that they treat other people with in terms of the attention that they’re giving everyone around them at equal attention or no attention, and they’re doing the same to you. They’re not really trying to understand you, quite frankly, they just don’t care. You know, they really don’t care. But I mean, fit even doesn’t care.
I mean, that’s just kind of what intp is are all about. Want to learn more about f5 Demon, I highly recommend you check out season 16 Episode Eight, it’s in the playlist here, this channel, you can learn more about fit demon or all the cognitive functions and their cognitive attitudes, according to Dr. John bebes. Model, and as is laid out in energies and patterns of psychological fight, who is one of my sources, to actually check out my bibliography go to CS joseph.ly forward slash reading, so that you could check out my bibliography there as well because apparently people are like, Oh, Mr.
Sands Johnson, and you don’t actually like cite sources and whatnot. I’m like, I do all the time. Element, Mr. CS, Joseph, because you cite sources all the time that makes you a te user.
And I’m like, okay, like, seriously, what do you want? What do you want from me? Okay, maybe I’ve just developed positive, you know, Introverted Sensing inferior habits through Introverted Sensing, aspirational, and then realize that there’s all you critical people out there, when it comes to my sources, my titles, you know, my status, and I can’t believe anything, unless I have the sources. And I know you people exist you te users. So I do this for your benefit. Honestly, I don’t like doing it.
But apparently people think I like doing it, but I don’t. So but I do it anyway, because it’s like the responsible thing to do. And there’s no other reason. There’s no other reason at all.
Anyway, back to the show. So it’s like literally after midnight, guys like I’m, I’m like exhausted right now, it’s been a long day doing a new website implementation. So that’s one aspect. The other thing is, is that they will ask you a lot of social questions.
And that’s because their Fe inferior may not actually understand it’s because if an intp is really trying to understand you, they’re actually going to literally create a map in their head about what you value. And they’re going to ask you what you value, or you’re going to just naturally tell them what you value over time as they’re around you. And then they’ll store that information within their souls, so that they will potentially maybe even produce the things that value you value at a later date, maybe for a birthday or Christmas or for like some kind of surprise, etc. But they’re always super mega attentive.
Here’s the thing, an intp doesn’t look attentive. And that’s why people assume that intp is aren’t trying to understand them, which is the complete opposite. It’s completely false. Just because an intp doesn’t look you in the eye doesn’t mean they’re not paying attention to you.
Just because they’re when you’re talking to them, and they’re not looking at you or even responding doesn’t mean that they’re not listening to you. They’re actually almost always listening. They listen to everybody kind of like what I NF peas do. Okay, I MPs listened to everybody.
They’re attentive, they’re super attentive, because that’s what si child is. It’s all about being attentive, right? And the thing is, is that they’re slowly going to just keep track of you and keep track of your value systems and what you value in the value systems, other people, because that’s how they understand people through their being attentive to other people’s values consistently, right? And then at times, you can ask them questions about what they’ve learned about you. Or wait a minute. Since when is an NJ actually ask an intp that question.
Oh, Miss intp, wife of mine. Could you tell me what you’ve learned about me? Huh? Do you think anyone ever actually asks their intp spouse that question? No, it actually doesn’t really happen. And I find that like almost hypocritical on the part of N j’s and J’s being those that would statistically be the most compatible with an intp even though technically intp is often and get married to ESFPs, far more than the rest of the types and also that ESFP marriage to an intp technically lasts longer than other relationships as well, which is also a very interesting dichotomy, because that’s a bronze pair. But it’s more on that later, I guess.
But anyway, the bottom line is guys, just make sure that we’re giving your intp enough room and enough time. Because if you’re just like, getting all upset at them for not even looking at you, and you’re assuming that, that listening to you, or assuming they’re not paying attention to you, you’re actually mistreating your intp. And it’s actually akin to child abuse, you’re abusing their inside child, so stop doing that. And it’s like really hurtful to intp.
Okay, I NTPs are so misunderstood by other people, they’ve some of the most misunderstood of all the types, I would say. And then as I think I think en teepees INTJ is intp peas, and potentially inf peas are the most misunderstood of the types, I would say. And it could get really, really hard for intp is because I NTPs are so bothered by people that they don’t want to be bothered by people that they just don’t have people in their life, right. And if you actually can observe them trying to understand by being attentive to you, or somebody else and trying to figure out their value systems, keep track of their, their, their actions, right.
But hey, you know, if you’re in a relationship with one, chances are you’re an SE user, so you’re very forgetful. So you’re not even able to keep track of all of the good things they do for you, you’re not even able to keep track of all of the, you know, every time they contribute to you every gift that give to you, every time they they grow your value systems are bringing you what you value, but then you just forget about it because you’re an SE user, right? And then the intp ends up feeling taken for granted or eventually neglected. Yet they’re the one that was actually going out of their way to understand you. Are you going out of your way to understand them? Maybe ask your intp what they think about that, hey, do you think if I’m going out of my way to understand you, as much or more as you’re going out of your way to understand me? Oh, I bet you’d be very surprised what the answer from their ti hero would be.
And I think it’d be very healthy of you to get that very critical, painful answer, you know, for your own good, right. Like Gellert Grindelwald would say who is an NTP for the greater good, right? If you’d like a chance for your question being answered on this channel, please post it as a comment below or put it on Quora and tag me and maybe I’ll get to it that’s pretty awesome. If you’d like to try out the official CS Joseph personality assessment because it’s live finally, and type yourself then I suggest go to CS joseph.ly forward slash discover and do it also please be aware that the test will hide answers for you and as you answer so I recommend answering the questions in the order you know for sure are true about you don’t like answer the questions in order you don’t have to do that just you can skip questions answer questions that you know for sure and then go back to the other ones because it will hide answers it will take away choices from you, because it’s doing that by design. So anyway, with all that being said, folks, see you guys tonight or tomorrow sometime