Season 8, Episode 8 Transcript
Hey, it’s C.S. Joseph with csjoseph.life doing another episode, the final episode of Season 8, which is the J- versus P-type comparisons that we’ve been doing, our last episode, if you guys remember, was the INFJ versus the INFP lecture, and today, we’re going to be doing the ISFJ versus the ISFP lecture, also known as the Defender versus the Artist, et cetera, but before I do that, today is the day with which the YouTube channel reaches 5,000 subscribers, thank you all so much for that, that is bloody fantastic, and we’ve been at this since March, as far as I know, and it’s great to join the 5,000 subscribers club, and onto the road to 10,000 as we continue, and to celebrate, two things I would like to mention regarding us hitting 5,000 subscribers before I continue on with the lecture, and that the first thing is that tomorrow night, I will be on the “Grimerica” podcast with Dr. Robert Glover, which will be awesome, and that is tomorrow night, and I believe that is going to be 8:00 pm Eastern time on their YouTube channel, livestreamed, I will be posting that on our Discord server, so if you’re not in our Discord server yet, please get in our Discord server, it’s in the description, there’s, like, a bunch of links in the description, go to the Discord link, make an account, get on Discord so that you can make sure that you are there for the “Grimerica” livestream where I will be with Dr. Robert Glover, who is the author of “No More Mr. Nice Guy.”
If you are a man, I recommend, like, if you are a member of the male gender, biologically speaking, I recommend you read this book. In fact, actually, if you are a member of the female gender, biologically speaking, I recommend you read this too because then it gives you tools with which you can criticize or hold your man accountable for, and this is also a great tool to help criticize yourself and hold yourself accountable for, and my lecture series known as “The Four Pillars of Self-Intimacy,” which is like, the first steps that someone would take to find themselves, et cetera, well, it’s basically a lot of that content comes from this book, so thank you, Dr. Robert Glover, for that.
Now, the other thing is I’d like to announce is that we are doing a giveaway, we’re gonna be doing giveaways now on this channel, and this is the giveaway, so I will be giving away your choice of a physical or electronic copy of “No More Mr. Nice Guy,” all you have to do is be a subscriber to the channel and leave a like, and then also put a relevant comment related to the discussion that we’re having in the comments section below, subscribe, like, leave a comment, you’re good to go, you’re automatically entered, and then we will announce it on a future lecture. We’re gonna probably start with doing multiple giveaways a month and we’re gonna be giving out books, we’re gonna be also giving out coaching sessions and various other awesome things here on the YouTube channel and on the podcast, and again, if you’re listening to us on the podcast, all you’re gonna have to do to enter, go to the YouTube channel, subscribe, hit a like, leave a comment, and then you’re good to go, and then I will write the name of the winner on the whiteboard in a future lecture and announce it, and then you just send your contact details and you will receive a book, which is awesome, so, or whatever else we’re giving away.
Anyway, with that in mind, it is now time to start the actual freaking lecture, yes, so that is the ISFJs versus the ISFPs, so how are they similar, how are they different? I have no idea, actually, I lied, I have, like, every idea, so they’re both behind the scenes, AKA background types, so that is informative responding control types, they are informative, they speak in a volume of words, context is king to informative people, which means they can say the same exact thing but it could mean five different things depending on the context in which it was said, right?
So you always have to be willing to decrypt what they’re saying as a result of their need for context, right? So context is king for the informative types, and they are both informative, and then they are also both respondent because they’re both introverted, which means they prefer people to come to them instead of them going to other people, which is understandable, and they are both control types, which means progress cannot take place in the midst of chaos, they need to remove the chaos in their life and have control of things in their life, and that could be anything in the physical environment, that could be anything in their inner world, or with their personal relationships, it doesn’t matter, those things are important and they have to keep those things under control because if things get out of control, they freak out, and they are not really able to function quite well, so remember, they both have the same interaction style. Temperamentally speaking, though they’re both concrete types instead of abstract, which means they’re kind of like, they’re more down to earth, which is the more concrete approach to things, whereas abstracting is kind of like me, I’m flying around in space somewhere, you know?
But they’re pretty down to earth, and I got a chain around my, you know, around my leg, around my foot just to make sure that I’m tied to the earth so I don’t fly off into infinity if you know what I mean, but again, ISFJs, ISFPs don’t have that issue because they’re both concrete, and the ISFP is the Artisan, they’re also known as the Artist, so they’re very live-in-the-moment, very mechanically minded, whereas the ISFJ is a traditionalist, past-focused, duty-based, whereas the ISFP is more willpower-based, willpower being they know the path, the one path, the best path that they want for themselves, right? And they have pretty good awareness of that one thing that they want and they’re going to get it, whereas the ISFJ is kind of more insecure about like, all of those paths, all those future possibilities, which one’s the right choice? Or which one’s the choice that that person is going to make, and how is that going to affect me, et cetera, that is kind of how they approach it, so with that being said, let’s do a dive-in with their cognitive function, so starting with the ISFJ, we have introverted sensing hero, so introverted sensing hero, with the ISFJ, they’re very past-focused, it gives them long-term memory access, that’s what introverted sensing is, it’s all about long-term memory, it’s also their sense of duty, it’s their sense of self-discipline because they are motivated by what they should be doing and not what they want to be doing.
Want is about willpower, it’s about introverted intuition, I want to choose this path, I want to go in this direction, I want this because it’s gonna get me this, et cetera, and then it just keep building forward and forward and forward, whereas, you know, extroverted intuition’s kind of like, going out in every direction, you know, all the possible paths available to me and others, whereas introverted intuition is like, ooh, this is just obviously the best path I’m gonna take so I’m gonna move forward in this direction, that’s introverted intuition, which we’ll talk about in a second, but introverted sensing is attached to extroverted intuition, and it’s all about what a person is experiencing, it’s all about their past experience, it’s where they get their sense of duty, what they should do, right?
Their sense of self-discipline, and very long-term-memory related, very long-term, ISFJs are all about long-term, if you’re trying to wonder if you’re an ISFJ or you’re an ISFP, for example, if you’re an ISFJ, you basically don’t forget anything, whereas with an ISFP, you’re actually pretty forgetful, but funny thing though, ISFPs don’t actually admit to anyone that they’re very forgetful and it’s very hard, sometimes, for people to, or for ISFPs to admit it, but if they are around people that consistently criticize them for being forgetful and they’re aware that other people think of them as a forgetful person, then ISFPs will accept that they are forgetful, but they need to have people around them to be that honest with them, right?
So just be aware of that change, or that point, it can get a little bit muddy there, but again, introverted sensing hero is all about what they should do, it’s what their duty is, it’s their sense of traditionalism, their sense of safety, it’s what causes them to want to protect things because they’re concerned about what may happen in the future, which is extroverted intuition, and they are on an axis with each other, Si and Ne are like in yin-and-yang equilibrium with each other, and because of that yin-and-yang equilibrium, what happens to one affects the other, right? So interesting point over here, ISFPs, we have ISFP morals, introverted feeling hero, and they are all about morality, and morality means everything to the ISFP, morality basically is what I believe is a good or bad thing, it’s what the individual believes is a good or bad thing compared to the Fe ethics of the ISFJ, which is what, okay, what does everyone else or everyone in general believe is a good or bad thing?
So again, we talk about abortion, you know, because why not talk about abortion because we try to do everything controversial around here on csjoseph.life apparently, so in regards to abortion, an individual may feel that abortion is a bad thing, but collectively speaking, the collective feels that abortion is a good thing, right? So notice how the judgment changes between good or bad depending on the context, the context of an individual or the context of the collective, the ISFJ is very aware of the context of the collective, and as a result of that, they make their good-and-bad decisions based on collective or group feel, as it were, whereas the ISFP makes their feeling judgments, their moral judgments as an individual, right? So that’s why the ISFP could feel completely different than what the collective may feel, right? The social norms, right? The social norm, the socially acceptable, that is what ethics is all about, and that is how ISFJs live their life in that regard, but you know, just because everyone else does it that way doesn’t mean that’s how I feel, is the ISFP way of doing it, which is awesome.
So in their mind, the ISFP is sitting at a table and they have a hundred thoughts in a row, and they’re sitting at the table, okay, you’re good, you’re bad, good, good, good, bad, bad, bad, good, good, until that line of thoughts is basically reduced, and then he’s made the, the ISFP has made the decision based on, okay, which thoughts are good, which thoughts are bad, good to go. The ISFJ’s a little different with their Fe Parent, what they are doing is that they have 10 tables in their heads, you know, and 10 thoughts at each of those 10 tables, and they’re all going good, bad, good, bad, bad, good, good, good, bad simultaneously, and the decision is made on majority rules, okay, majority of the tables have reported that the majority of their thoughts are good. Good, we’ll make the decision.
Oh, majority of the tables have said that it’s bad. Oh, well, then it’s a bad decision, and it’s because they’re getting multiple inputs of good-or-bad value judgments from multiple sources before they make the decision, whereas an individual feeler, they are the only source, basically, because in the ISFJ mind, they might have their one table where they are there represented as an individual, but they might have a table for their spouse, they might have a table for their children, they might have a table for their church, they might have a table for their community, it doesn’t matter, there’s different tables in their heads, they’re taking in, they’re being aware of everyone around them and their opinion as to what is a good or bad thing, and then they’re using that to develop their ethical decision, whereas, again, the ISFP decision is okay, no, I don’t care, I just, I mean, I kinda care, but what’s more important to me is how I feel about it, not necessarily what you or anyone else feels about it, so that is how they behave morally, right?
And what this does is it allows them to rationally create principles, ISFPs are insanely principled people, and it comes out in their art, and how even they design art or affect the physical environment when they are creating their art, or when they’re building something or when they’re working on a project of some kind that’s with their hands, it’s almost always with their hands, when they’re building a house, it’s always done in a systematic or routine way, and those systems and those routines that the ISFP develops are based on their moral principles because it’s like, it is good that I do it this way every time, or it’s good that I do it this way this time and I’m gonna do it that way that time because it’s good for me to do so, right? Because they have developed principles. They end up having principles and personal rules or you know, regulations, or routines, principles that a moral hero has done, which is really endearing for the ISFJ because the ISFJ ends up looking up to the ISFP and being like, “Oh wow, “you are like, the most moral, good person I’ve ever met, “and I always wanna make you feel good about yourself “because you make me feel so good about myself “because I’m just like a vampire sucking your feelings away “and I’m consuming, eating your feelings, “and it makes me feel like a very good person “because I’m able to model my good and bad behavior, “my good and bad value judgments “based on your amazing, heroic value judgments, “ISFP-friend-person,” and then all of a sudden, it’s like, oh yeah, that’s exactly how they behave.
Wow, I’m kinda liking the lighting, it’s like, so much better than the last couple of lectures I’ve done since I’ve moved my whiteboard, I mean, wow, the lighting was absolutely terrible last time, and I mean, why not? And eh, you know, also, water bottle, right over there, I mean, why not? So anyway, ISFP ego, all about morals, and they have mastery of physics, this is something ISFPs actually, they tell me, “Oh no, I’m not really good at physics,” and then it’s like, “I’m not a physics professor.” Actually, you are very good at physics, if you know how to operate heavy machinery, and without even necessarily planning things all the way through, but you could probably do a small drawing and whatnot, you could change the landscape very easily with this heavy machinery, you know, heavy equipment, like, why not, why aren’t you that way? “Oh, yeah, Mr. Joseph, I guess you’re right. “You know, if I have full freedom “and all the equipment that I need “to make something happen, I guess I can, you know? “And if I’m in the mood to work on a car “or if I’m in the mood to learn how to play a guitar “or if I’m in the mood to learn how to sing, “you know, I’ll be straight with you, “I’m the best there’s ever is,” you know? Kind of like that guy Johnny in Charlie Daniels’ “The Devil Went Down to Georgia,” he’s playing that fiddle, you know what I mean? And that fiddle is totally an ISFP because he’s the best that ever is, you know what I’m saying?
But that’s how they approach things, you know, those Artists, they have to feel good about the art that they’re doing, they have to feel good about how they’re approaching the physical environment because they live in the moment. Extroverted sensing parent is all about giving others a good experience, or an experience, it’s about giving others, it’s about showing other people things, it’s also being able to see with your mind how the physical environment around you can change based on what you want to do to the physical environment, right? This is what gives them the ability to learn tools super quick, they could be car mechanics if they apply themselves, they could be amazing musicians if they applied themselves, there’s so many different ways of doing it, I think like, possibly, maybe the lead singer of Maroon 5 is also an ISFP? I mean, I think so. The point is is that they really have that awesome mastery over the physical environment, and extroverted sensing, also can, it’s weird because actually, I don’t really talk about this very much, but extroverted sensing can actually detect weakness, at least what they perceive as weakness, it’s not necessarily actual weakness, but it’s what they perceive as weakness in other human beings, and that’s where they push those other human beings or they give them experiences, hoping that those human beings get stronger.
Now, however, high extroverted sensing parents and extroverted sensing heroes, you know, SPs, well, of all the types, they’re the highest types to have the propensity to beat their children based on that because they don’t want, they don’t feel good about themselves, they don’t think of themselves as good enough because, “Oh, I have weak children, “so I’ve gotta toughen them up,” know what I mean? And then they use their extroverted sensing in that bad way, which can be abusive in that regard. So it is just something to keep in mind if you’re an SP type or an ISFP, you know, just remember that just because you’re perceiving weakness does not mean that it’s actual weakness there, right?
“Oh, I can’t believe you said that, Mr. Joseph, “are you really saying that I could be at risk “of beating my children?” I mean, like, okay, yeah, we’ll recognize that everyone is human, right? And everyone is flawed and has their own flaws, you know what I mean? And there are plenty of audience members of this channel and people that I have coached multiple times who have had pasts of abuse with their parents, right? It is a thing, so just be aware of that risk, right? Be aware of the risk and understand that it is a thing and it’s something to watch out for, Se users can do this, I even know some INFJs who have been abusive to their own children or abusive, they’re more abusive to their spouses than they are to their children though, let’s be honest, whereas yeah, NFJs is more like, towards their spouse whereas SPs are more towards their children, which is kind of interesting to me, so it just, it’s kind of interesting though, watch how extroverted sensing behavior changes amongst the types, especially when it comes to abuse and it kind of manifests in different ways.
Of course, there’s all the different kinds of abuse, like emotional abuse, psychological abuse, as well as physical abuse, I’m just talking about physicality right now because of extroverted sensing parent, right? So and that’s not to say that, I’m not saying that ISFPs beat their children, I’m not saying that, I’m saying that the people that do beat their children, statistically, there’s a really good chance they’re an SP, so be careful because extroverted sensing parent or hero. So Ni Child is all about what they want, this is a huge difference between the ISFJ and the ISFP because the ISFJs do not want to do anything, they are not about what they want to do, they are about what they should be doing, right? And as a result, ISFPs are all about what they want to do because they are all about willpower and finding the best path forward for themselves, like a little kid, and they do it innocently, right? Little kid running through the minefield and somehow they’re able to get through all of the mines and it explodes and whatnot, and then somehow, they’re just perfectly okay, that’s because of introverted intuition child, it’s right here, and introverted intuition is there and they’re able to want whatever they wanna do, and it’s like, wow, I want to give you this experience, or I want to change the physical environment, and just like, oh, I wanna paint this painting, et cetera, they are all about what they want, whereas ISFJs are all about what they should do, that’s what they are motivated by, they do not allow themselves to want things because they have Ni Demon, why?
You never, ever, ever, ever ask an ISFJ what they want, you ask the ISFP what they want, but you never ask the ISFJ what they want because you are at risk of pissing them off, don’t piss off the demon, right? That demon exists to strategize a plan and plot your demise, okay? And ISFJs are very good at plotting demises and they’re excellent at executing those plans, be very careful, do not do this, it usually happens when you are not sharing your intentions, or behaving safely, or behaving regularly around ISFJs, and then they see you as a risk and they start creating contingency plans in their mind on how they’re going to have to take you down if you become someone who’s out of control or a continued threat or risk, and they’ll literally strategize how to take you down, and when the time comes, they will execute on it, and they’ll elect themselves judge, jury, and executioner, and you don’t even know that you’re already part of their elaborate scheme, and it’s already too late just because you didn’t make the ISFJ feel safe by revealing your intentions to the ISFJ, make sure you do not conceal your intentions around them, especially if you’re in a close friendship or even a romantic relationship because then that’ll just continue to make them feel unsafe, if they’re a woman, they’ll feel unloved, if they’re a man, they’ll feel disrespected because you are being shadowy and like, not sharing your intentions, you know what I mean?
So this is why ISFJs automatically usually label me as someone who is edgy or creepy, or SJs do this in general, not just ISFJs, because I conceal my intentions and SJs thrive on knowing what the intentions of other people are because that’s what makes them feel safe, right? But am I gonna share my intentions with SJs? Hell no, why? Because first, when the first five laws of power, according to Robert Greene, it says, “Always conceal your intentions,” or never say more than what’s necessary, for example, because if you give them information, I mean, that’s how you defeat an ISFJ, if you ever wanna go toe-to-toe with an ISFJ, the number one way to defeat them is to not give them any information, and in fact, shut down all their sources of information, get them separated from their network or their Rolodex, and if they have no information, they have no power because according to G.I. Joe, “Knowing is half the battle.”
Well, to ISFJs, knowing is more than half the battle, and if you can actually inhibit them from getting that information, you could take them down super quick, it doesn’t matter how much they plot against you, it doesn’t matter how much they have a contingency plan on how to take you down, if you basically shunt or shut off their source of information because they can get like, very cloak-and-daggery and very spy-ish with their little spy networks, their little spy social networks that ISFJs have with their Fe Parent and their extroverted intuition inferior function, you can put a stop to that by inhibiting their information or talking to other people and twisting things around in such a way where they’re no longer getting information from their info sources because they could be very gossipy or busybody-esque, and then as a result of that, they no longer have any power over you, and it doesn’t matter because their plan that they had initially created in their mind is no longer valid and they can’t follow through with it, AKA, you just defeated the ISFJ, awesome.
So that’s just one way you could take them down if you have to. Well, for ISFPs, if you need to take them down, you just make them feel good about themselves, always be truthful of what you’re doing because they always ask like, “Hey, what are you doing?” you know what I mean? And then always tell them that you think highly of them, and say why, for example, and they’ll never bother you, you know? Problem is, though, they have Fi Hero, so Fi Hero has a propensity of being selfish if you know what I mean, so you have to realize that, you have to call them on that, and their Fe Nemesis will kick in and be like, oh, I was so worried that you feel bad about me, I don’t want you to feel bad about me, and I want you to think highly of me, so I’ll stop being selfish now, and they can easily course-correct, that’s one of the things I like about ISFPs is that they can really easily course-correct compared to an INFP where it takes so much longer and so much more effort and a lot more criticism and making them uncomfortable so you get them to course-correct, right? So I mean, there’s even times when you might even have to abandon an INFP to get them to course correct because they won’t even get anywhere until they hit rock bottom if you know what I mean.
But with an ISFP, because they have Ni Child, you can kinda motivate them to change before they hit rock bottom, which is actually really, really nice, and I like ISFPs for that reason, I mean, my type and ISFP is number three in the compatibility for social compatibility for friendship, so it’s like, oh yeah, that’s totally dope, let’s do it. So anyway, so we talked about flying markers and where I also talked about Fe Parent, Fe Parent is very aware, socially aware, it’s all about how other people feel, right? And definitely loves absorbing the morality of the ISFP, Ti Child is all about logic, ISFJs are all about what they think, what they know is true or false according to logos whereas the ISFP, it doesn’t matter, truth doesn’t really mean very much to the ISFP because of Te Inferior, AKA rationale, and rationale is right here with my awesome orange marker, and they are insecure and afraid of what other people think of them, and to ISFPs, it is not about what is true or false, it is what is good or bad, true, false doesn’t really mean anything to an ISFP.
Now, if you’re telling them what’s true or false, then it means something to them, but within themselves, it does not matter that much to them, it does not matter what’s true or false inwardly. Outwardly, they care what you think is a true or false thing, that’s why ISFJs go so well with ISFPs, no problem, that is exquisite, awesome, let’s do it, right? Well, as I continue to fumble again and again, the issue with that is it’s all about perception, right? Because in the absence of communication or explanation, perceptions become reality because it’s not about what’s true or false to the ISFP, it’s what’s the ISFP believes, belief is everything, you know?
♪ If you believe in magic ♪ right? That was like, an old slogan from like, McDonald’s or Disney a long time ago, from like the ’90s. Yeah, I’m a millennial, sue me. But the point is is that it’s all about belief, belief is everything because belief is actually one of the routes that ISFPs develop their core principles, right? And they have these amazing moral core principles, and they do this through their moral belief system, and they create a belief system for themselves, it doesn’t mean that they have to subscribe to a church or to an organized religion, although some of them do, it’s usually because it’s foisted upon them, but ISFPs need freedom, you have to give their Ni Child freedom, if you do not give their Ni Child freedom, one way or another, there going to come through the door that you locked them in that room and they will break that door down because they have to have full freedom. If you take freedom away from an ISFP, they’ll demon-rage their Ti Logic, and they will engineer your demise, you know?
And all of a sudden, you find yourself going down a slide that leads to, like, a pit of lava or something while they’re cackling to themselves, as you’re like, melting, that’s how ISFPs would do it, you know what I mean? So don’t, always give their Child a choice, always give an ISFP a choice. ISFJ, you don’t have to give them a choice, you can obligate the ISFJ all day long, you could tell the ISFJ what they should do, “Hey, you should do this,” and then they’ll do it, whereas the ISFP, if given the choice, you’ll be like, “Hey, you wanna do this? “Does seem like the best path forward for you, Ni Child?” “Oh, yeah, it does, it sounds like something I want,” and then they want it, right? Whereas ISFJ, you don’t have to do that, ISFJs, you just tell them what to do, you obligate them, and guess what, Se Parent for the ISFP is there to obligate the Si Hero because Si is motivated by Se, for example, because it’s all about obligating them, so obligate the ISFJ, they will do their duty, make sure the ISFJ knows what their duty is. Well, ISFP does not really care about duty, good luck obligating them, although they do have an Si Critic down here, which means they can do their duty every now and then, it can happen, but it’s rare, primarily, they need to be given a choice.
If you have an ISFP child, you can’t just tell them, “Okay, it’s time to go to bed.” What you have to do is instead ask them, “Hey, would you like to go to bed now “or would you like to go to bed in five minutes,” right? And then they choose five minutes, and then, “Okay, five minutes are up.” “No, dad, I don’t wanna go to bed,” and it’s like, “But you said you wanted to go to bed “in five minutes.” “Okay, yeah, you’re right,” and then they go to bed, you see what I’m saying? It’s because you gave them the choice, ISFPs are all about choices, right? So give that Ni Child choices, you’re good to go. Now, again, Te Inferior, they are insecure about what other people think about them, they’re insecure in their status, they’re insecure in their reputation, reputation and status mean so much to the ISFP, they just want people around them to be like, “Oh, I think so highly of you “and you’re such a valuable member of the team, “and I really think so well of you,” and then they just melt to themselves and like, “Oh, I’m such a good person, “and I’m so glad that these people think so highly of me “and I am like, literally the best person they’ve ever met, “this is awesome.
“You know, I’m the best artist “and I produce the best paintings, “the best work, the best music, “and they know it, they know I do, “and I’m so glad that I do what I do “because they think so highly of me “and I feel so good about myself, ISFPs, yeah,” you know what I mean? Okay, for sure, fair enough, but they’re very afraid, they get very afraid that other people will say, will think less of them, so this is oftentimes why Fi Hero is just silently judging other people and they’re not actually speaking up because they’re afraid that if they speak up, people will think less of them, and then they’ll actually take a reputation hit and they’re not willing to take that reputation hit, they are not willing to take the risk or risk their reputation in saying something that may actually be true because it’s how they feel, but they’re so afraid of people thinking less of them that they won’t do it, right? So they can’t, so, you know, but if they get over their fear, they can unlock their ENTJ subconscious so they become the Chief when they do this cognitive transition, which, by the way, if you haven’t seen that lecture yet, watch it, it’s a lecture on cognitive transitions, ENTJ subconscious for cognitive transitions, which is awesome, it’s pretty awesome that way, cognitive transitions, they end up as the ENTJ, and then they could take charge, they can actually lead teams, it’s like leading a band or leading a team, or when we’re doing this huge art project, you know, it could be a bunch of graffiti on the street and they’re leading a band of people, you know?
Some goons to go do some amazing graffiti-esque mural in the middle of the night, no one would even know, I mean, that actually happened personally to me, an ISFP, when 9/11 happened, they went and painted, he got a whole band of people together with spray paint, and then in the middle of the night, painted a whole barn with the American flag, and it was absolutely astounding, specifically for the 9/11 Memorial when I was a freshman in high school, you know what I mean? It was awesome, and it was shortly after I started school, which I hated starting school, it sucked, of course, I think everyone would agree with me on that point. So but yeah, if they get over their insecurity, if they start to care less about how other people think of them, or if they become secure in knowing that people do think of them and they do really valuable work in and of their own right, they are able to take charge and manage others, and even to the point of entrepreneurship, which is absolutely fantastic, my brother-in-law is an ISFP, and he is recently doing this with his company, and his company is taking off because he is no longer concerned or afraid of what other people think of him and he’s able to take charge and he actually runs multiple teams, he’s bringing in a lot of money per month, he was able to quit his day job as a result, and he’s able to make it happen, and ISFPs, you can have that if you get over your inferior function.
ISFJ is a little bit different, ISFJs have the ability to innovate with their ENTP subconscious, but how are they gonna do this? Well, they have extroverted intuition inferior, which means they are afraid of the intentions of other people, they are afraid of what paths other people will take, they are afraid of what people would want, they are afraid. If they stop being so afraid of the intentions of others and realize, here’s one thing, ISFJs, you’ve gotta realize, you have introverted sensing hero, which basically means, ISFJs, you’re indestructible, literally indestructible, you know what I mean? Which means you can endure anything, you have the ability to endure any hardship in your life, it is unbelievable what you people are able to endure, I mean, seriously, cue up return of, cue up the movie “Return of Jafar,” “You’d be surprised what you could live through.” Exactly, you would be surprised what you could live through, Si Hero, you can live through anything, like, anything that is thrown in your direction, you can get through, you can endure, you can outlast it, you are literally the immovable object of all the types, it is unbelievable what you’re able to do, and because you know you could literally get through any form of adversity, what business do you have being so afraid of what other people want, what other people might do? What business do you have being so afraid of the future or the potential? Well, you realize that because you can endure anything that you don’t have to be afraid of failure or other people failing you anymore, right? Which allows you to unlock your ENTP subconscious because you’re not afraid of other people’s intentions knowing that, oh, I could feel safe all the time, do you know why?
Because I can get through anything, if I can endure anything, then why do I have to be so concerned about my personal safety all the time and my personal comfort all the time? Because Si Hero’s all about comfort, right? “Oh, that person might make me uncomfortable. “Oh, but wait, I actually have endured so much in my life, “I no longer have to be so afraid “about what that person might do to me “because I’ve already endured it, so who cares? “And actually, I’m just gonna focus on doing my stuff,” which, guess what, means it brings innovation, yes, ENTP subconscious brings innovation, innovation is everything, and they are able to innovate, innovate technology, innovate systems, innovate social interactions, and it’s through this amazing innovation that an ISFJ has, heck, they could even bring their innovation to the ISFP and be like, “Hey, maybe if you operated “your heavy machinery with the excavator “and did this over here, “you can make some really amazing pond “if you just change this hill over here, “and the water will come down and boom, you got a pond,” and then the ISFP’s like, “Wow, I didn’t think of it that way, “you have a really good point, “wow, you’re really smart, you’re really intelligent, “yeah, you’re right, I’m gonna go do this, “this is definitely something I want to do,” and then all of a sudden, the ISFP gets that excavator and then boom, they have a new pond in this ISFJ-ISFP couple, for example, in their 40-acre property, and then boom, there’s a pond and it’s great, and the ISFJ gets to swim in it and everything because her ISFJ, or her ISFP husband got the excavator out and made this happen because she was willing to innovate, because she was not afraid of what her ISFP husband wanted to do with that area of the property, she just made the suggestion, and she was able to do it.
Ne Inferior is all about suggestion and people are suggestible, which means they can innovate, and the ENTP can innovate through other people by being committed to suggestion, it is absolutely awesome what ISFJs are able to do, yes, I know, they have their virtue and vice of faith versus fear, but this is, I’m telling you, get over the fear because you can already endure everything anyway, so why are you even bothering being afraid? So stop being afraid, please, ISFJs, do the world a favor and don’t be afraid, and put on your armor, you know what I mean? And have faith, faith in yourself, right? And have faith that no matter what’s going to happen to you, you can get through it, and then as a result, you will be successful, you will be closer to enlightenment, you will be closer to getting harmony for your family and being successful instead of alienating everyone in your life. Oh, yeah, let’s talk about alienation, Fi Critic, ISFJs to hold themselves to this insanely high moral standard and this insanely high moral principle that not only can they meet that super high moral standard because they have a really hard time meeting it themselves, but they actually enforce it on other people, why? Because they’re obligated, and because they are obligated themselves, they actually obligate other people with their Se Nemesis, and their Se Nemesis nemesisly, evilly in some cases, negatively in most cases, obligate others, you have to go, you better go to this family event because if not, you got another thing comin’.
I don’t know how many ISFJs in my life have forced me to go to family events I didn’t even care about doing and meeting people I didn’t care about meeting, I got more important stuff to do, they’re so afraid that I wouldn’t want to come, so they knew that I didn’t want to come, they were afraid of that, so they forced me to go against my own will and they obligated me into going, right? Because ISFJs are great at being obligated, and because of how obligated they are, they feel they have every right to obligate others, which is not true. That’s the problem. So and guess what, they obligate the ISFPs because SPs have, you know, ISFPs have Si Critic and that can be a problem, and then they, too, can be obligated, you know? Even though they’re very short-term memory with their Se Parent because, you know, new memories go in every day, it pushes the old stuff out, but their hard drive, which is long-term memory, Si, you know, that’s the hard drive, that’s not even going to write for some reason, you got their little hard drive down here, that’s pretty small, only 15 frames a second, where their short-term memory is only 75 FPS, that’s a lot of short-term memory, lot of RAM they got going on there, lots of RAM, it’s awesome, you know, but only 15 FPS down here, so that would kind of be an issue, that’s kind of why ISFPs can get pretty forgetful all the time, and you know, that’s why they forget those obligations that ISFJs put on them, you know what I mean?
Here, I’m gonna obligate you, but you know, I’m also going to forget, er, yeah, that’s really effective. So anyway, so yeah, they obligate others, they do it in a very negative way, they have that super high moral standard, and when they hold other people and obligate other people to their super high moral standards, it’s usually as a result of what we call dogma and doctrine, especially in churches, especially with faith-based systems because they’re all about faith, and they are forcing other people to follow a dogma, and that dogma could be a dogma about the family or a doctrine of the family, you always show up to family things or you always go to church, et cetera, and it’s all about dogma and doctrine to them, and that just alienates people, it’s a wonder that ISFJs wonder at all as to why people don’t invite them to things, it’s because they alienate everybody with their super high moral standard, and that’s a problem, thank God ISFPs are around because ISFPs could chime in with their Fi Hero and their Fe Nemesis and be like, “Hey, Ms. ISFJ, or Mr. ISFJ, “maybe you shouldn’t be obligating those morals,” because what the ISFP’s gonna do is be like, “Wow, you got super high morals, “but my morals are actually even more crazier than yours “and you can’t even live up “to your own moral standard anyway “but I can live up to mine, “which means I have full freedom to do whatever I want, “and I don’t care about you obligating me, “and if you really are gonna keep trying “to obligate me to do those things, “screw you, you could go do it, fine, “I’m gonna go do my own thing, screw you,” right?
And then the ISFJ sees that the ISFP is not interested in doing that, and then the ISFJ is alone going to this family thing, and then they’ll remember that later, and then they’ll remember to not do that to the ISFP, and then, okay, they stop alienating people, and that’s just one example of how one person, how one less person is not as alienated. Be careful with ISFJs, so remember, if you’re trying to figure out if you’re an ISFJ or an ISFP, are you alienating other people? Are you practicing dogma and doctrine, are you obligating other people to do things that they don’t even wanna do? Why, because you think it’s fair to do so because your Ti Child thinks it’s fair for you to obligate other people because you’ve been obligated your whole life? See, that’s wrong, ISFJs, stop thinking that’s okay, just because other people can obligate you does not give you the right to obligate others, never forget that. ISFPs, they have something interesting going on with their subconscious, they think they’re so supportive and they think they’re such a good person that they deserve things, and they think they become so deserving over time that if they don’t get what they believe they deserve, they actually push people away, they loyalty-check them, they end up becoming very silent and very judgmental and then to the point where they almost become indifferent, you know, it’s kind of like that INTP apathy, but not so much, it’s more of ignoring, they’re just straight-up ignoring or losing all steam, and they end up just becoming lazy and lethargic and they lose all sense of diligence because what they were diligent before, you know, well, you’re not giving me what I deserve, ESFJ unconscious, you’re not giving me what I deserve so I’m not gonna be supportive of you anymore, and then all of a sudden, they’re not motivated to do anything in your direction anymore and it’s because it’s a deserving thing and they’re jumping to conclusions, potentially, about what they deserve.
That’s wrong and that’s not right, and that’s a problem with the ESFJ unconscious, they can get into this like, constant thing, “Oh, I deserve this, “and why don’t you think that I deserve this “when I know I do?” And then they jump to conclusions and their Ti Demon activates, and then it’s just like, wow, boom. So ISFPs, they realize they’re such good people with their high moral standard, but they realize that other people are not so good and they worry that other people are bad people, right? And they’re already worried that ISFJs are bad people, but guess what, ISFJs are so critical towards their own morals and their own self-worth that they are, you know, they’re beyond worried of being a bad person, they already walk around believing they’re a bad person, and some of the ways that they feel good about themselves, ISFJs, if I could just obligate my family and friends to go to church with me because of dogma and doctrine, then I could feel good about myself because I made other people like, go to church with me, and I’m obviously a good Christian, or I’m a good Mormon, or I’m a good Muslim, or I’m a, insert a, you know, label of like, religious belief system here, I’m a good one of those people because, you know, one of those people, Te Trickster, labels, this is what, they’re not even really aware of labels, they wanna be aware of labels, they think they’re aware of labels and they just label people, in fact, my own mother thinks I’m autistic, for example, and I mean, she put that label on me, you know?
And she’s an ISFJ, but she doesn’t know how to label anything to save her life, and then she has this moral dogma and doctrine according to her belief system, and she feels so good about herself when she brings other people to church with her, that’s when it happens. I mean, all those Jehovah’s Witnesses and all those Mormons that are coming up to your door, the missionaries, what percentage of them are ISFJs? Hmm, yeah, not cool because they’re doing it so that other people feel good about them so they can get the recognition because that’s what ISFJs really want, they really want recognition, and they believe that they’re doing what they should, and people have obligated them their whole life, so they have every right to obligate other people, and then they have this super high moral standard of their dogma and doctrine, so they’re just going to obligate you to go to church, and they’re gonna obligate you to go to this family event, and they think it’s okay, and you know, because of this label of this belief system that they have, and it’s wrong, and they’re just not aware of what other people think, they completely unaware of what people think to the point where they’ll tell other people what they think themselves even though those other people are already thinking that but they’re not aware of it and it just becomes repetitive, and then those people end up feeling disrespected and they don’t wanna have anything to do with the ISFJ because they are alienating, and again, it’s no wonder that ISFJs are alone and not invited to things if they are doing this. How do they go over it? They stop being afraid, they recognize that they have no right to obligate others just because they allow themselves to be obligated themselves, because that’s wrong, and they do not hold other people unfairly to their super high moral standard because even they themselves, ISFJs can’t even meet their super high moral standards, so just because ISFJs may feel like a bad person doesn’t give you a right to try to make someone else feel bad by obligating them to go to church with you, you know what I’m saying? Like, it’s not right, I get you’re the Defender and you’re trying to defend your faith, but obligating other people against their will because you’ve been obligated against your will because even though you don’t really care about your will, but other people do care about their will, especially ISFPs, they definitely care, what right do you have to do that?
That’s wrong, don’t do that, please, you are so amazing with your innovations, ISFJs, you’re so amazing being that knight in shining armor to protect the innocent and the needy and you are all about justice, and I love your sense of justice, but sometimes, your sense of justice can turn into revenge, and we’ve already talked about how your Ni Demon, when you’re so afraid of what other people are going to do and you create these contingency plans in your mind as to how you’re gonna take those people down and how you’re gonna get justice, and then once you have your justice, it becomes revenge and you end up seeking revenge from other people, that’s your demon, that’s your INTJ superego talking, seeking revenge, revenge is everything to it, avoid the revenge, please, your Ni Demon doesn’t help. The superego exists to burn your life away, it is the giant, red, nuclear option to reset your life, that is why the superego exists, you are to live in harmony with your superego inside your mind, and it exists as the nuclear option, stop using the nuclear option on other people, unless, of course, you have to reset your life to free yourself, to see the light, to see the truth, you know? The way, the truth, the life, well, I guess you’d have to actually research and verify your own beliefs instead of being dictated to and being obligated by some guy talking to you on the pulpit, and actually your use your freakin’ Ti Child for once and actually verify what they’re saying and do the research instead of just taking what they say for face value because you’re a good Christian person and you just check your mind at the door when you’re walking into your church building ready to receive that message from that crazy preacher on the pulpit and being like, “Oh hey, you know, “you should live your life this way,” and then you just listen to it, and then you actually do it because you’ve been obligated without actually using your freaking’ Ti Child to verify what they said in the first place, hashtag, do your own freaking research for once.
Verify your beliefs, verify what you know, verify your faith, ISFJs, and it’s not just in religious beliefs, it’s in everything, verify what you believe about your own family, you know, I know a lot people who have ISFJs as parents in their families that they didn’t even verify, and then as a result of that, their own children were being molested and abused because they weren’t willing to verify, because they believed so much in the dogma and the doctrine of their family and how great their family was that it didn’t even occur to them that their children were being harmed by other family members, right? So maybe it’s a good thing that those knights in shining armor, also known as the Defender, also known as the ISFJ, would actually go so far and obligate themselves and realize their personal responsibility and verifying everything, that is their Ti Child, that is what it is they are supposed to be doing, but for some reason they don’t, they get sold on a lie and they end up protecting a lie and they end up enforcing that lie on other innocent people in their life, don’t do it. Yes, it seems like I’m ragging on ISFJs, now we’re gonna get to the ISFP.
I talked about how ISFPs feel so deserving because if they give them too much praise, it’ll go to their head and they’ll think they’re so good and they become so arrogant, I have met some insanely ISFP arrogant people, their pride just explodes, they get insanely arrogant, they feel like they deserve more pay, they feel like they deserve more advertising or reputation or status, it just seriously goes to their head, and then when they don’t get it, they decide to not be diligent anymore and then not be supportive towards you anymore when in reality, their ego was inflated the entire time, and that’s not fair to you when they decide to not be diligent when they’re only lacking in diligence because their inflated ego got reduced a few notches, right? How is that fair? So ISFPs, recognize like, you’re good, but you’re not that good, recognize that you have to humble yourself, if you’re lacking in diligence, if you’re really not putting in the time, like, if you’re at a job that you believe is a dead-end job and you’re not, you know, people aren’t thinking highly of you, and then you’re not thinking that you’re really good, is it really them? You need to find out, is it really them, or is it you the problem? Are you actually doing substandard worK? And because you’re doing substandard work, are you caught in a self-fulfilling prophecy that your substandard work which is not appreciated by other people is causing you to be less diligent at your job when you believe it’s their fault when in reality, it’s your fault because your low-quality work, and no one’s actually just, you know, you gotta find out. So how do you do this?
Go to other people, do some work, and be like, “Hey, what do you think about this, “am I doing a good job?” You have to do this, ask other people to verify what you believe for you, ISFJs, they’re supposed to be verifying, you can go to them, right? And yeah, ask for criticism. ISFPs, you have to ask for criticism, ISFJs, you have to be willing to offer criticism, besides, you’re kind of, especially an immature ISFJ, you’re at risk, or have already done, you know, you’ve been alienating other people as it is, so what’s the risk of being more critical? Be critical, criticize other people, find out what the truth is, verify others, verify yourself, remember, the truth is a double-edge sword, right? It comes out of your mouth, you know, the tongue? It’s a double-edge sword, as you’re cutting other people with the truth, you yourself are getting cut with the truth yourself, it is super important, right? Recognize that that is you’re responsibility, ISFJs. So we talked about how there’s not as much of a long hard drive, just dropping more markers, we’ll just pick up another one, and because of that, they have a lower long-term memory, whereas the ISFJ has a super high long-term memory, but their short-term memory is a little bit less, but pretty decent, but they have super high long-term memory, ISFP, lower long-term memory access because their mind is not able to access their long-term memory because their mind is more focused on accessing their short-term memory, basically, in the ISFP, and it’s the opposite with the ISFJ.
Another thing about the ISFP, they are so unaware of the intentions of other people that they are definitely open to attack, especially like, if you take them to a used cars lot, they will be manipulated by the extroverted intuition user, and they are super susceptible to ENFPs and ENTPs, ENTPs the most, ENTPs can marionette ISFPs like crazy, you have to be careful, luckily, ISFJs exist to protect ISFPs from those people, especially since the ISFJ is pure opposite with ENTP and definitely can tell if an ENTP is being insincere and wearing a mask, right? Because it ISFJ wear masks too sometimes, they know how it works because they have an ENTP subconscious, and they can protect the ISFP from that. ISFJs, recognize it is your responsibility as an SJ to protect SPs from people taking advantage of their willpower, that is your responsibility. SPs, it is your responsibility to make sure other people around you are growing, that they’re changing, that they’re getting stronger in their life, that’s what you’re supposed to be doing, and showing them how to do things, growing things, right? I know a lot of ISFPs who have green thumbs, they’re great at horticulture, get involved in that if you can, or painting and whatnot, growing skills in others, as they develop their own skills, they grow skills in others, that’s what SPs are for, right? So you can grow skills of your ISFJ friend, for example, grow their skills, and they’ll remember everything you’ve ever taught them and they will become super capable, almost as good as you at what you do to the point where you can actually rely on them in projects that you do and actually collaborate on things together so that you, ISFPs, never end up feeling alone or that you have to do everything by yourself because you’ve been able to teach the SJs on how to do things properly, especially ISFJs because they’ll remember, and ESFJs as well, but especially ISFJs.
And then obviously, the Ti Demon will come out if no one is thinking highly and giving credit where it is due because Te Inferior absolutely needs credit, it needs reference points, and if no one’s providing that information, well, the ISFP’s like, “Well, shoot, “I do all this good stuff for you, “you’re not even giving me credit, “you’re taking credit from me, “you’re actually stealing credit, “well, I guess I’m gonna go demon-mode,” and then they do, and then it just completely falls apart and it just explodes, definitely not something you want with an ISFP.
So anyway, that concludes this episode on how do ISFJs compare to the ISFPs, Season 8, Episode 8, that is the final episode of this season, although we have two more season on type comparisons, which we will be doing in the near future, as well as exploring more information about the temperaments as well as the different attitudes of the various cognitive functions, which will be coming up next, and then we’ll be launching into other amazing areas of content for this channel. So if you found this lecture useful, helpful, educational, insightful, and enlightening, please leave a subscribe and a like for the channel, and also subscribe to us on the podcast as well, that would be awesome, and don’t forget, we are doing that giveaway for “No More Mr. Nice Guy,” Dr. Robert Glover, to enter in the giveaway, all you have to do is subscribe to the channel, so be a subscriber, leave a like, and also leave a comment that is relevant or relatable to this topic in the comments section, and you’ll be automatically entered to win this book, we’ll also be giving out other books and we’re gonna be giving out free coaching as well to our viewers here on the channel and listeners on the podcast as well. If you haven’t joined the Discord channel, please join the Discord channel, the link is in the description of this lecture, and I’ll be doing live Q&A sessions from the Discord, so learn more about it there, and if you’re in the Bay area, join our Meetup group, but that’s also in the description, and I think our first Meetup group is scheduled one week from tomorrow, and we’re gonna be doing some other Meetup groups at different days at different venues, and if you would like, just toss me an email, and my email’s in the description if you wanna suggest other venues or other days that we are doing the meetup, go for it, I have no issue with that, so awesome. That was definitely an interesting lecture, and I got many more of these to go, so I’ll see you guys tonight.