Season 8, Episode 7 Transcript
– Hey guys, it’s CS Joseph of csjoseph.life, doing another episode on type comparisons. But this particular lecture series is judging versus perceiving. We’ve been doing this lecture series to help people who are like, Oh, I’m an ESTJ or I’m an ESTP and I can’t tell which one because the letters are confusing or I don’t know the cognitive functions or you know, insert whatever, right? So today’s lecture is a season eight episode seven as the second to last episode of this particular season, we got two more seasons to go with type comparisons and then we’ll have the foundation of type comparisons down. And then after that, we’ll just literally do just user for subscriber requests ones. Even those, these four lecture series about type comparisons are already subscriber requested, I’m not going to just do like every possible combination this time,
I’m just going to be straight up. If you want a combination lecture, find put it in, I’ll add it to the schedule. But these were kind of planned after so many people have asked for them, right? So fair warning though, today’s lecture will be longer than usual because this lecture just happens to be the most requested on the podcast and on the channel. The number one most requested lecture. Why is that? Well, I believe that is because it combines my two largest audiences here on the channel and on the podcast, INFJs is an INFPs, I’ll be comparing both types. This is necessary because particularly my who are the INFJs lecture and who are the IFPs lecture, both those lectures are seen as controversial.
In fact, if you were to go to the who are the INFJs lecture right now and review the comments, they’re either super super positive or super, super negative. It’s a very polarizing lecture, and it’s because I spend a lot of time criticizing INFJs. I also criticize INFP is as well. And the problem is is that when people watch these lectures, they either immediately identify it because, you know when they took the test the results that got are actually accurate or they don’t identify it; which basically means when they took the test they got the wrong result, which is very typical. I’d say that tests right now that you take online with the human metrics, test 16 personalities, et cetera all of the tests out there, they are inaccurate. At best they’re eight out of 10 accurate, but on average there are five or six out of 10 accurate. So up to 15, 50% up to half of the people that take the test are getting inaccurate results. Why is this?
Is because they don’t know who they don’t know themselves enough. They don’t have the four pillars of self intimacy which is a lecture playlist on this YouTube channel that you can actually watch and learn about, how to find yourself basically, right? That’s one important component. They don’t understand how relationships work with themselves or with others. They just don’t know themselves, right? So how can you take a test if you don’t exactly know yourself, or if you don’t even know what you want or how you really approach? A lot of people would argue, well, I’m in my own skin, so I know me the best. That’s actually statistically not true, rationally speaking that’s not true.
Logically speaking, okay, Yeah, that makes sense. But rationally, no, There is no real ethos being attached there. And from an ethos standpoint, because the value is so nil or so low on, you know, the accuracy of tests it’s not something that I can recommend, right? For people to take. Anyway so when people are coming to my YouTube channel and they’re watching the who are the INFJ they have this insanely negative reaction they get this knee-jerk reaction, they don’t even finish watching the lecture. Had they actually finished the lecture, they’d realized that I say a lot of positive things as well as a lot of negative things. But most of the time people watching these lectures are like, Oh my feelings, I can’t stand it. Yeah, what you’re saying is true, but your delivery is so negative so I’m not gonna listen to you And to which I just have to be like, great, let me shake your hand and then tell you to your face, how ignorant you are. And then great, by all means please return to the gutter which you came from.
You know, I mean, or maybe you accept the fact that or the possibility at least that the results that you got when you took the test are actually inaccurate or maybe the people that you believe that you are typed that you typed in your life, those are actually inaccurate. Why? I’ll explain that in a second. I have to set up this foundation for this lecture. Before I dive into INFJs versus INFPs. How do INFJs compared to INFPs is the name of this lecture, but in order to actually get a full understanding for this specific audience who has an insanely high chance of getting, being mistyped with tests, we’re going to explain the mechanics of that and why the letters are inferior and using letters instead of interaction styles multiplied by temperaments, which is like the actual real way to type yourself, you know with a hundred percent accuracy instead of five out of 10 accuracy at worst with tests. For example, when you have that issue in place, when a when you face that risk, what do you do? Right?
Cause here’s the thing you’re taking the test, not only are you potentially mistyping yourself but when you’re typing other people in your life you may also be mistyping them. And I’m seeing this a lot in the social compatibility lectures. People are like, Oh no, this type goes really well with this type. And it’s like, okay, well, my first question is have you even bothered to verify that your type is actually what you believe? Have you bothered to verify what these people’s types are? Oh yeah, they took a test. And I’m like, guys, I’m sorry just because someone took a test that doesn’t mean anything to me. It means nothing. I don’t care if you take a test, I don’t give a damn. What I care about is whether or not you’re using the type grade. The type grade is on csjoseph.life is on the very front page of my website. You just throw your email, you could download the PDF file and you get a nice four by four grid that shows you the types. And all you have to do to type yourself as you identify your temperament, and that’s the column and you identify your interaction style, that’s the rows. And it tells you specifically which type you are and you can do that for anyone. If you don’t know how to use this type grid to type yourself, watch my playlist here on YouTube or on the podcast about how to type yourself or, and others. If you watch this and I think it’s 10 lectures long.
If you watch all 10 lectures all the way through maybe take some notes and whatnot, you will have everything you need to understand every facet of the type grid to be able to type yourself and others with 100% accuracy. And the more practice you get when you come into contact with any human being, even if you’ve never met them before within 30 seconds, you know what type they are instantly without even needing a test, right? So when you’re watching my lectures guys understand I do not care about the test. I don’t care about test results they don’t mean much. Test results only do one thing, ball-parking. They only ballpark where your results are. That’s it it’s just ball-parking. That’s the only value it has. It’s not actually true. It’s not actually accurate.
If you want accuracy use the type grid is the best option that we have right now. Now that being said, I do have my own test coming out which will be based on brands in a interaction style typing and I’ll be making it available to everybody for free. I just need to have a little bit more money to be able to get it fully developed, and it’s actually, the prototype is done right now, we’re still working on it. But I’m saving my pennies, and I got a developer, and as soon as I have enough money to pay the developer I’m going to do that. And then that will be available on my website. And everyone will be able to go there and use this test so that they can start to practice using the type grid. And then eventually you don’t even need the test anymore because you understand everything there is to know about the test already. And then you can just use the type grid and it’ll be committed to memory or whatever. There’s no need to use the test anymore because you will master the skill on your own. That’s the beauty of it. That’s the point. You do not have to rely on a test anymore, this actually becomes a skill that you have for yourself. The problem is most people are like, Oh I already have that skill. Like great.
You have that skill based on Myers-Briggs type indicator, right? Where you’re just looking at people like, Oh he’s obviously introverted or he’s obviously intuitive. Or he’s obviously thinking, or he’s obviously judging. No, that is a failure. That doesn’t work. That is not accurate. Why? Let me explain that to you. So this lecture again that’s gonna be longer than the others. So this has two sections section one, is going to be when we talking about J versus P specifically in relating to the NBTI and why does a flawed system? And then we’re going to do a deep dive into the INFJ and the INFP, so you folks can finally know for fact why these two types are so different and how they’re also similar, okay?
So let’s begin section one of this lecture. So we have this middle section here in the whiteboard J versus P question Mark. That is the question, like why do people watch these lectures? It’s because they’re trying to figure out if they’re more J or if they’re more P with one of the types. Fair enough. So we have INFJ and INFP. Did you guys know that INFJ are technically actually more P than INFPs? Did you know that INFPs are technically more J than INFJS? Did you know that? Oh, Well, if that’s the case, Mr. Joseph, I can kind of understand why the tests are not accurate because if the INFP is actually more J than the INFJ, then that would mean I’m probably mistyping myself. Who to thank, right? See that’s a potential issue.
So did you also know that the INFJ is actually more T than F really? Yes, yes, it is. just because there’s an F here, just because there’s an F right there does not necessarily mean actually I’m gonna use a different color here, let me use red because who doesn’t like red, red is dope. So, yeah. So just because there’s an F here does not mean there’s there’s a T component. You have to realize this with all the types guys, the F does not necessarily mean that. Now, why is the F there it’s, it’s there because there’s an extroverted feeling function Fe in the top two slots, in the top two slots of their ego. So we have Fe Parent, that’s top two slots, so that automatically, according to the MBTI that makes the INFJ a J, okay? Yeah, but I disagree with, I disagree with the MBTI on this, and you know, it’s interesting Socionics, this is one of the areas that I get to praise Socionics.
Socionics figured this out real quick because Socionics are like, wow, MBTI is not actually accurate about this because so Socionics lettering system is actually way more accurate than the MBTI and this is why Socionics tests are technically a little bit more accurate than MBTI tests specifically for this reason and then we’ll show you even more. And then you have, you know, INFP who are also very F but then this case, this is actually true, but they’re actually more J. Why is that? Let me show you. So the INFP for example, introverted feeling right here is actually a J function because introverted feeling, extroverted feeling, introverted feeling, introverted thinking and extroverted thinking those four cognitive functions are all J functions. J means judging, judging means decision-making. So please understand that decision-making is what J is for but they’re top function is for decision-making. This is why INFPs end up, when they take the MBTI test, they score as INFJ because they’re very decision-making oriented. And the MBTI test is so flawed that it’s not really able to make the distinction all the time with the little percentages and the little numbers that they do.
This is a problem. This is what causes INFP is to believe their INFJs. It is so frustrating. Well, let’s look at INFJ similar problem. INFJs they have this function here called introvert intuition and guess what? Extroverted sensing, introvert intuition, extrovert intuition and introverted sensing. Those four cognitive functions are perceiving functions. They are not used for making decisions. They are used for perceiving and gathering data or giving data. Gathering and giving data, sending and receiving data, gathering information there is perception. That is the point. So what, wait there a J but their highest function is actually a P, how does that make any sense? Exactly, see, this is why when INFJs, you know or when INFJ is take the MBTI test, there is a risk, a risk of up to 50% that they will actually score an INFP and then they believe for many many years that they’re INFPs, and then they find my YouTube channel and start complaining to me that, you know, my lectures are completely wrong, and I don’t know what I’m talking about. Specifically because a test told them what their type was, even though, the test is wrong, so now I’m getting judged because of failed test results. Great.
You see my point, guys, this is a P function yet they are J according to MBTI for community. And here’s another thing, you know this is an F look at this Ti Child here, Ti Child this is thinking, right? It is a source of thinking. So, I mean, in reality, we, the should there really be an F here. Should there really being the F and the, you know for this letter, they’re actually more thinking. A lot of people don’t understand that, people think that I actually have this, you know, unicorns and rainbows rainbow dash light type, you know, mystical thing, which, you’re all sure, they can be definitely, you know mystical and go in that direction and there is heavy involvement with INFJs and the cult, okay? No, one’s going to, because it just appeals to them in a lot of ways, for some reason, but they’re, you know it’s because of Ne Nemesis in there their interaction with symbols and patterns, et cetera. But, but the point is, is that INFJs can easily be misjudged by the letters, right? And this is not the only type this is ISFJ are thinkers too, because they have TI child, right?
Because remember, and introverted judging function like Ti or Fi, they are sources of feeling, sources of thinking, right? Sources of decision-making. So just because it says an F it doesn’t mean you’re not a thinker. This is insanely important. So anyone watching this channel you need to understand these distinctions and this applies to all of the types. This is why I maintain over and over and over again that the letters are an absolute waste of time at the end of the day in comparison to the cognitive functions, you have to know the cognitive functions. If you don’t know the cognitive functions all you have to do is download my tight grade and that tells you the cognitive functions. And then after a while they’ll start to see that there’s a pattern. Now, Yes, you can take INFJ or the four letters so you can actually do a reverse logical algorithm to calculate cognitive functions based on the four letters, yes, you can. You could do that with Socionics model as well, yes, you can.
But that would be the only actual real value to the letters. Otherwise, the only reason I talk about the letters is because when it comes to 16 union archetypes to talk about them, INFJ, INFP even though these lettering systems are kind of inaccurate it is the gold standard by this psychological community when it comes to personality typology that everyone uses. They’re inaccurate, but everyone uses it. And because that’s what everyone uses that’s why I’ve using them in these lectures to explain it to you, because that’s what people search for, that’s what people know, even though it’s technically wrong or technically inaccurate, but that’s not the point, it’s important to just make sure that you understand this distinction. Right? Okay. So anyway, that finishes section one of this lecture. So just be aware that these differences exist, it’s really important.
So, anyway, with that in mind we’re now going to do the deep dive comparing INFJs to INFPs and how they’re different. So let’s talk about that. Both types are idealists. So they’re both intuitive feelers, that means they’re very people oriented, very people-focused, very philosophical, very credo oriented all about increasing or optimizing the social experience or the social behavior of the human race. Many examples of those are like Gandhi, Pythagoras Robert Green, Jesus Christ, Martin Luther King, that you can just keep, you know you just keep going and going and going. But intuitive feelers are very important for the human race because they are what really the I like to call them the guardians of the heart, right? The heart of mankind, you know, what’s in here, not necessarily what’s in here.
And it’s important that they do this because, they do this in such a way where it literally can lead to a movement that sparks social change, rapid social change on a worldwide scale that makes the human race better tomorrow and have a better future. That is the point the ideal is because they are, they know what the ideal is and they’re trying to bring the ideal into existence for everybody. And as the INFS lead, you know, in this area for our race, we end up reaching any evolving better as a race so that we can finally, you know and I’m not making an argument for a utopia here but idealists are often trying to look for utopia, right? So that’s another argument, you know and we can talk about personal sovereignty in utopia and in another lecture series, Oh, wait, I do it’s called season 13 on the podcast and or personal sovereignty here on the YouTube channel; I recommend you check out that playlist as well. We’re three lectures in, and I think I got like 13 or 14 lectures planned for that one.
So we’ll let you know how that goes if you, you know, watch it or listen to it. So be that as it may, let’s begin with INFJ versus INFP. So INFPS their background types, so they are informative, responding, control. They take their time jolly sweet time. I mean, quite frankly they could be those people that are driving pretty slow on the road, to be honest, compared to INFJs where they can go super mega fast on the road. Obviously, you know, if they’re dealing with some performance anxiety, you know, with with their driving on the road they might drive a little slower until they’re more comfortable on the road. And that usually is because INFJ require third-party data, in order for them to feel comfortable instead of feeling comfortable in their own. And this is what contributes to INFJ is actually being like the one type out of all of the types, other than maybe the INTJ that ends up learning how to drive last basically, it’s because of that built-in performance anxiety that has inferior to you guys, INFPs don’t have that problem.
For example, INFPs are more concerned about, you know what others think of them, and that’s sort of their insecurity exists instead of it just being with constant performance anxiety, but they’re very slow, You know, it can be disciplined, gotta be in their comfort zone especially on the roads, you know and the can drive long, long, long, many long hours. And it’s like, wow how are you able to drive 12 hours straight without really needing to take many breaks? And they’re just able to do it because they are in their comfort zone, because they are able to endure, right? So the background types informative, responding, control INFJs are finishers also known as see it through types or try it the course types. They are direct responding movement, very movement oriented. They need progress.
If there’s a lack of progress especially with people or relationships in their life they will freak out and it will cause a lot of problems for them and those they are in relationships. So you always have to make sure that there is progress. You may have to flip them a bone every now and then to, you know, keep them happy, et cetera, because if you don’t, if they feel neglected that that quality time love language that they have which is the number one love language of the INFJ quality time, it’s everything and it’s quality time with that one person that they need. And they don’t like sharing that one person very often, right? Luckily INFPs can rise to the occasion actually provide that quality time with the INFJ, but the INFP still needs to have room to be able to do their own pursuits at the same time or else they’re going to feel bad about themselves. They’re going to feel like they’re falling behind or they’re going to be a comfortable, et cetera.
And, you know, it can lead to conflict on part of the INFP plus INFP relationship but not necessarily, you know, something there, but again direct responding movement for the INFJ one’s movement, one’s control, both are responding because they’re both introverts. They prefer people to go to them for conversation. And then one is direct that’s the INFJ they say what they mean, they mean what they say and with as few words necessary whereas the INFP could be voluminous in words if they can actually speak, I mean, sometimes IFPs choose not to speak and just stand up from a distance and silently judge everything that’s happening around them instead of actually like speaking out about it unless it’s something that directly affects them and makes them feel bad or uncomfortable then they’ll open their mouth.
Which kind of sucks because I wish INFPs would take more initiative in that area and that could actually prevent a lot more problems because they could see into the future and they could warn people about the bad things coming ahead of time. But often times, especially immature INFPs they don’t make that decision, right? And that can be a problem. So just, just be aware that these are some basic differences between the INFP and the INFJ. So now we’ll go look at what they look like with our cognitive functions. Right? Okay. So INFJ their hero function which is the apex of their ego is introverted intuition is also known as willpower. They’re very willpower focused and they could focus like a sniper rifle on things.
And because of that it’s almost as if they’re like, there is no…. it’s almost as if they have no peripheral vision, because they get so hyper-focused on one thing at a time that’s difficult to get them to see what’s happening around them sometimes. And sometimes you gotta be like, Hey you need to zoom out a little bit, I see zoomed in under sniper rifle but at least zoom out and get a bit more of the picture here, right? And that can be an issue. But introvert intuition is fantastic, they can get through almost anything. INFJs because they have Si Demon, their bodies are more prone to getting sicker than everybody else getting the rarest diseases over everybody else, getting the rarest forms of cancers over everyone else. But out of all of those people that do get those rare diseases and those health problems, INFJ are the one type that survives them all, because introverted intuition hero they could literally will themselves to survive. And they just have to have that will to survive and they can get through anything. It is absolutely fantastic to see, regardless of whatever adversity is sent in the direction of the INFJ they can get through it no matter what. And it is absolutely the dopest.
So all about what they want, they’re very wante, they’re very, they have desires they can be very impulsive. This is especially good in a bedroom situation especially with the INFP for example because the INFP wants to feel like they’re wanted, they’re desired and then the INFJ has like seething with desire for the INFP and the INFP he’s like, Aw, this is awesome, I’m so desired right now you know. I can’t wait for what wonderful sensations this INFJ is going to give me et cetera, et cetera, because the INFP is primed for receiving at that point in time. And then the INFJ is like, yes I want to give you a good experience, you know, and give you the best sensations you’ve ever had, et cetera. So it ends up working out and that’s introverted tuition combined with extroverted sensing inferior. So, and then the parent function for INFJs is all about social rules, social norms, they’re just aware of how everyone around them feels which is great for an INFP because the INFP is all about how they feel, right?
They are all about how they feel because they have Fi hero the apex of the conscious mind also known as the ego of the INFP is morality or how they value themselves or how they feel about themselves or how they feel about anything. Because introverted feeling a hero is all about good bad, good, bad, good, bad. They’re sitting at a table with a hundred thoughts in a straight line and each thought is coming up to them and the INFP is sitting at the table and they’re like, okay, you’re good, you’re bad, bad, bad, bad and the accused getting smaller. Okay, good, good, good, good, good, bad, good, good, bad, you know, et cetera. And that line is getting shorter because they’re making decisions rapidly with super speed with super capability to understand what they believe. Okay, this is a good thing, this is a bad thing. This is a good thing, this is a bad thing. It’s almost like they’re playing the drums. You know what I mean? Or whack-a-mole right. Whack your bad whack you’re good, et cetera.
That is literally Fi hero. And Fi parent from the INFJ is aware of how Fi hero feels. And because of that, the INFJ is always seeking to make the INFP feel good about themselves and that really is amazing to the INFP because and then also the INFP gets the opportunity to lead with the moral principles of the home, like, for example if they’re in a romantic relationship or in the friendship, for example, and the INFJ looks at the INFP as someone who’s super principled, who is super moral, who has the highest morals out there and something that is absolutely amazing and explicit right? So those moral principles are there and not only that they can actually develop their moral principles and develop their personal philosophy and develop their creative in such a way where an INFJ would just be, Hey, you know, try it this way or maybe adjust your principles like this, et cetera. And then the INFP ends up like, Oh yeah that’s a good experience, that was a good sensation, I wanna have that experience again. So I’m definitely going to adjust my principles for that and their ethos as a result because INFPs are all about ethos and INFJs are all about logos, for example.
And because of that ethos, they’re able to adjust their ethos, adjust their, their belief system and then they’re able to, you know and they feel improved, right? And the number one purpose of an INFJs life is to improve other people. And the types of people that they can improve the most are NFPs. So INFP for example, would really like the fact that they’ve just been improved, that they’ve been upgraded by the INFJ to be a better human being and more effective of what they do in any area of their life, right? And that’s because Fe Parent is so supportive of Fi hero. INFPs have extrovert intuition parent, this gives them the ability to, you know be aware of metaphysics. Metaphysics are the, what if right? Whereas physics is the, what is. And metaphysics is attached to the past which is Si Child they’re linked together and in access and this is why we have the first law of time which is all that has happened before will happen again, which is, you know eventually going to be decided as one of the main laws of quantum physics, as soon as people figure out the laws. But I mean, I have my own beliefs as to why, what laws are what based on what I know about metaphysics and what I know about uni-analytical psychology, but all that has happened before will happen again, right?
The first law of time as I call it. And it’s here within extroverted sensing and introvert intuition, see our minds are aware of metaphysics in this way and yet people who are preaching about quantum mechanics don’t even know the first thing about psychology. And if our minds are already aware of this law, then why isn’t it already a law of quantum mechanics? It doesn’t make sense. Maybe these like quantum physicists should probably figure this out because metaphysics has a lot to do with the what if you know, and possibility and observing possibilities. And then because you’ve observed a possibility you’re making it more likely to come true which would also technically be like another law of my choice. But I mean, you know, come on. People just want to decided, you know be ignorant when they can actually realize that there’s a lot that can be learned about metaphysics, if you actually look at how psychology works inside the human mind and the human soul because the human soul itself is inherently metaphysical, but I mean, you know, who would know that?
So introverted sensing is the past and because it’s aware of the past it’s long-term memory access because if an INFP has more longterm memory than they’re able to predict the future with their expert intuition, parent expert intuition is aware of the intentions of other people. It is aware of what other people want, what other people desire ahead of time, and then they can predict the behavior of people as a result, and this is what gives INFPs the ability to warn others of impending catastrophe, or impending disaster. And they can continue to provide those warnings for people which is absolutely awesome. Well, that’s really great for an INFJ because I changed wanting to do something and then INFP is like, Hey, hold on you probably wouldn’t want to do that because if you do this, this is gonna happen, and this is gonna happen, and this is gonna happen and this is gonna happen and then after those four things happen these other things will happen as a result. And they could really literally see the consequences that cause and effect of all of the actions, right?
So cause and effect and itself is, Oh, great. Another law of quantum mechanics, you know, it’s like you know, I’m so going to get criticized by talking about quantum mechanics like this, but be honest guys, a lot of people talk about psychology as a pseudo science that’s because psychology is technically a study in the metaphysics or at least the base level of metaphysics and people don’t even realize that but I mean, come on, it’s a fact. Logos. So they know what they want, they can warn who they want and none of that INFPs are aware of what they want and INFPs love it when INFJ is want the INFP for example. And they’re so aware of that and that’s why these two functions can really team up with each other. And it’s really fantastic. INFP also like to be made comfortable with her with her Si Child, Si Child is all about being its comfort zone. It’s all about doing the familiar and being around the familiar. It also it’s it’s this way because it has such a long-term memory access that INFPs can remember things from like 15, 20, 30 years ago I did have INFPs that I talked to on a regular basis and they’re like 36 years old but they’re telling me stories from when they were five from four or five years old, it’s like, wow, Holy smokes, how do you remember all of that, was because of that Si Child.
The Si Child is able to remember everything like that. INJS they are actually at risk of being forgetful, the reason why is because of their short-term memory, their short-term memory is introverted sensing, their long-term memories actually their demons their lowest awareness within their mind. And because it’s their lowest awareness, they tend to forget things because INFJs live in the moment or they live in their own future. Whereas INFPs live in the past or other people’s futures or other people’s fates or other people’s possibilities, right? Whereas the INFJ is living in their own fate and their own, or everyone’s now basically everyone’s now extrovert sensing. Physics, extrovert sensing inferior is all about mechanical awareness. It’s about what’s happening right now. It’s also short-term memory like a computer. You have Ram in your computer and you have a hard drive. The hard drive is long time long-term memory. The Ram random access memory is all about short-term memory. Yes, our brains are literally computers. Huh! Funny how that works.
And that’s because extraverted sensing is here, extraverted sensing is, they have a lot of Ram which gives them a pretty good processing power in the moment but when it comes to long-term memory, it just goes away and they end up having to store their memories in the physical environment, in the form of totems. Let’s talk about totems. What is totems to an INFJ? Jewelry, for example, and when they received jewelry, it reminds them of certain things. For example, my girlfriend, she’s an INFJ and I got her some earrings, for example and those earrings are a constant reminder to her how much I care about her and how much I love her. And whenever she feels that there’s a negative situation in our relationships, she can remember the memory of me giving her those earrings, and know that I haven’t given earrings like that to other women because I value her so much more and then as a result of that, she realizes, Oh, okay there’s not really a problem, I’m just being paranoid in this situation. Or maybe I don’t have all the information or maybe I’m jumping to a conclusion. I shouldn’t doubt him as much as you know I could be potentially because he gave me earrings and this is just a reminder. See, that’s what totems are. Totems are reminders, even a sticky note that is a totem right? Text messages stored on your phone. That is a totem. Your phone itself is probably a totem of totems who knows, but it’s all about, you know reminders, of pictures on a wall those are totems. It’s kind of like that movie inception, where they spit where the guy spins the top lane and then the Caprio character spins the top just to see if you know which reality he’s in to make sure that he’s in the right reality, for example.
And, and if it falls he’s in the correct reality, if it keeps spinning he’s not in the right reality, a totem, right? And it’s based on a memory because people when they’re, extroverted sensing, they need totem. So when they pick up an object all of a sudden it triggers all of the memory that they have the long-term memory of the object so that reality extroverted sensors are storing their memories in physical objects instead of storing memories within like INFP do. INFPs end up becoming this walking archive over time because of their ESTJ is subconscious and then their Si Child is able, they themselves are a giant totem. And that’s why INFJ is like to having around, for example or other extroverted sensing users because it’s like extroverted sensing etches introverted sensing. And that etching provides permanent information you know, permanent etching, permanent memory creation in that other person and then they are literally creating a totem within this other person. That person is a walking reminder of that memory.
And that’s why when INFJ breakup with people especially when they’re in romantic relationships with them, it’s like they’ve lost their mind. It’s because their long-term memory that they stored up in that person is just completely gone and it takes so much more effort to try to remember it. And they have to piece together that area of their life and it can be a very traumatic experience, especially for INJs. INJs is more than anyone, is more traumatic experience to try to remember. And that’s one of the reasons why they cut people off, because cutting people off they’ve stored so much memories in those people and those people being around them will just remind them of those painful memories. And they can’t get over the, the emotional trauma of that so they have to cut those people off. Its called the INFJ door slam, right? So they get doors slammed and then those people are no longer in their life. And then it’s like, as if they’ve cut out those memories entirely, this is how INJs work, it’s because it extroverted sensing inferior, right?
So extroverted sensing child has all about being comfortable and the extrovert sensing inferior of the INFJ seeks to make the Si Child comfortable, seeks to give them absolutely every best possible experience or sensation. And the Si Child is always comfortable with the INFJ, always comfortable with Se Inferior, always willing to try anything and have new sensations and new experiences that the INFJ can craft and give to the INFP. Another way they do that though is also by reality checking INFP, for example because they have Si Child, and Fi here, they can get insanely lazy. And because of that, they get stuck in a rut. They get stuck in their comfort zone. They end up not being productive. They end up stagnating in their life. They ended up not getting any goals done and then stop growing as human beings, this pisses off the INFJ. So then they use their Se Inferior to activate their ESTP and then they start giving that INFP reality checks. Hey, here’s a reality check. Here’s another reality check. Here’s another reality check, just to make the INFP a bit more uncomfortable, and get them out of their comfort zone, for example and write and criticized using logos, using truth criticize the INFP, tell them, Hey you probably shouldn’t behave like this.
And then the INFP is like, Oh yeah, you’re right. I shouldn’t and then I’m not going to do that anymore. And then all of a sudden the INFPs is a better person, they’re improved because the INFJ was criticizing them, because the INFJ is giving them reality checks and awesome. They are improved, which fulfills the purpose of the INFJ in the first place, their number one purpose in life is to improve others, awesome. So that’s Si Child, Te Inferior is really interesting. INFPs are all about their beliefs, Te is rationale also known as beliefs. It’s not necessarily true false, it’s just what they believe about the true false. Another way of looking at it is statistics or data manipulating data, that’s why INFPs are fantastic financier’s, they’re really good at money management, but if they’re, but you could be an INFP watching this, well, I can’t believe you’re saying that because I’m not actually really good at money.
Yeah, that’s because you never had the self-discipline with your Si Child to actually devote yourself to understanding financial management. But if you actually took the time to read and research it you would be an expert more than anyone else that walks the earth to the point where you could actually predict markets and become some of the best day traders that actually walked the earth. But I mean, you like actually have to commit yourself to that kind of study now, wouldn’t you? Oh, but that would require you to get out of your comfort zone and stop being lazy. Wow, I mean amazing, that’s right. So Te Inferior though it is unsecure about how other people think of them to the point where it could be super detrimental to the INFP, because the INFP is like, well, in the absence of communication or explanation, perceptions become reality which basically means that the INFP is got to like you know, thought manipulate people around them sometimes so that their reputation is good.
See INFPs are all about saving face at times, you know because they’re so insecure about how other people feel, think about them and they want people to think highly of them. And, you know, sometimes it would seem like the INFP can be a little deprived in that way the similar way that INFP can but not as bad, depravity is the primary advice of the ENFP but it’s more of a secondary bias for INFPs and INFPs can be super selfish in that way. And it’s because Te Inferior wants people to think highly of them. And it’s just not really going to always work. And again, these two functions here link together Fi plus Te, they’re linked together in the same way Ne and Si are linked together and those links together can be an issue, right? So just be aware of that.
Then introverted, so Te inferior trying to make other people think things trying to you know, Hey, you need to think well of me and it’s not necessarily true, it’s not based on facts. Remember, it’s very beliefs cause they want people to believe good about them in the same way that they believe about themselves. I have all these, this huge set of beliefs about myself that make me feel good. You need to believe these things. You need to think these things about me too so that I can feel good when I’m around you basically and that’s kind of how INFP is work in that regard. Of course, I actually just had that Ti Child logic, I was like, all, that’s not true, I’m not gonna believe that about you. How about you actually be principled and a good person instead of trying to potentially manipulate my think, you were thinking of others. And Si Child, I’m sorry, can’t be manipulated.
It just really can’t and it’s not going to accept manipulation because Te, Child is very innocent. It’s like a little kid going across a minefield of lies and it’s going to get to the other side no matter what you do, whenever you throw it to Ti Child. So if Ti Child has enough time to think about everything, it has all the information present about it it will always arrive to the truth. And that way it can always cut through the BS provided by, you know, Te users especially NFPs who are constantly potentially trying to manipulate the thoughts of other people, to make those people think well of them in those situations, because they want it, it’s more important to them to feel good instead of actually behaving truthfully as to what they’re saying, that they are, for example and the Ti Child is not gonna take the BS of the INFP, right?
And but don’t worry, INFJs have problems too. They have their issues with corruption, right? INFJs when they’re around the wrong people they can be corrupted there. They’re mirroring those people, in their mirror can actually become cracked and corrupted over time. So even when they’re away from those people, they’re still corrupted. Luckily the high principle of high morals, the INFP exists and then the IMFJ can mirror the high moral principles of the INFP in such a way where that corruption starts to be corrected. and then it’s like the mirror of the INFJ heals, right? Because they around moral people. If you’re an INFJ and you’re watching this and you’re having a really bad life, it’s probably because you have a bunch of losers in your life that you are valuing for some reason which you probably shouldn’t and you need to get those losers out of your life. Surround yourself with highly principled and moral people like INFPs. I’m sorry, you’re not gonna get better morals than from an INFP or an ENFP from a moral principle point of view. Yes, they are prone to depravity but then you can just criticize them with your Ti Child and breathe fire on them to burn the lies away basically. And then they’re better people.
And after you burn the lies away with your dragon fire coming out of your mouth, right? Where you’re cutting the lies away, the double-edged sword coming out of your mouth because you know Jesus, He’s an IMFJ. And yet in the book of revelation it talks about how he comes back and saves the world. He’s got a double-edged sword coming out of his out of his mouth and that’s his tongue. He’s telling the truth. Because when you tell the truth, you’re cutting somebody at the same time, but it also cuts you too because you better not be a hypocrite when you’re telling someone the truth. And that’s why it’s a double-edged sword. Also say fire, you’re breathing fire in this person, fire when you’re breathing fire it’s gonna burn you at the same time it burns them, right? That’s also in his logo, it’s also in his truth, so you gotta burn the lies away when you’re telling the truth to the INFP, because they need your truth to stay principled in the same way you INFJs need their morals so that you are not corrupted, right? So you both are helping each other in this way.
So seek relationships with is INFPs and INFJs it’ll do you good. Mirror the right people. Get the losers out of your life, otherwise, you’re going to be super corrupted and you’re not gonna have any integrity. INFJ you were supposed to be providing us with integrity. You’re supposed to be leading our race with integrity. The only way that’s gonna happen is if you’re mirroring the right people. Get the losers out of your life. Create a Wolf pack of good people. Create people that you trust and care about that are loyal to you. People that you would be willing to take a bullet for and people that’d be willing to take a bullet for you. That is what you should be doing. But instead, you know, you’re going for the low-hanging fruit because you and yourself are potentially a low quality human being yourself, right? Well, that’s because you’re mirroring the wrong people.
Maybe you should focus on having integrity and then be a higher quality human being, a better human being, you know being with better moral principles, right? Like, you know, INFPs. That’s why when you come together, it’s like two puzzle pieces fitting together perfectly. And you’re able to, you’re able to correct the problems on both sides of the spectrum. And then when the two become one, you become an even better human being and you’re able to really self-actualize in every way possible. And that is possible through the NFJ plus NFP relationship. I cannot stress it enough, it is absolutely important that you INFJs understands. Stay with INFP if you’re going to be providing the vision of the philosophy, a core philosophy for the human race that betters us as a race maybe you should be doing that.
Well, you can’t do that if your principles or if you’re depraved, if you’re selfish, right? Or if you’re believing lies that you’re telling other people, you can’t do that, you can’t believe your own lies that’s why you need an INFJ around to verify your beliefs. Because Ti Demon, they’re gonna verify anything, but Ti Child gonna verify everything. So when you’re telling beliefs to your INFJ friend they’re going to verify your belief, thank God because then your beliefs won’t be so screwed up. Oh, I have all the database, all the data and the statistics and the rules on how I should make this decision. Yeah, but it doesn’t mean it’s actually true. Thank God for INFJ, is to cut through the bullshit for you, because you know, you’re at risk of believing things that aren’t even true. I mean, have you ever heard of a misleading graph before? Like it’s everywhere. I’d say probably the majority, the gross majority of data and statistics out there, in some capacity is misleading, or, you know because correlation does not equal causation. Well, I mean, you know, you need Ti Child to help you cut through all that crap.
So Se Inferior very insecure on the INFJ of giving someone a bad experience, this is where their performance anxiety comes from, we talked about already but they really desire to give people a good experience. And since the INFP is basically by default comfortable around the INFJ, they can actually get out of the inferior mode to getting their aspirational mode. And they are able to aspire with giving it the absolute best possible experience to the INFP right? And then makes them super major comfortable and it is awesome. INFPs don’t make other people feel comfortable. They are all about being comfortable themselves. INFPs do not exist to make other people comfortable. That’s not how it works.
So if you’re like thinking that you’re an INFP and you’re not, if you’re trying to make people comfortable and don’t really care how comfortable you are this is one of the major distinctions between the two. You know what I mean? You can’t do that because INFPs are completely unaware of how to make other people comfortable, because I started sensing trickster, you know, that thing in their mind that causes them to drop things all the time. You know, they just drop it. Ooh, I just dropped it. You know what I mean? And then they’re constant drops up there, they’re like, literally that nerdy kid that’s got a whole bunch of books and everything in their hands, and they’re just dropping it as they’re walking around in the, you know in the hallway at school, for example, that’s an INFP or technically an INTP but still INFP he’s do it because have Se Trickster in the same way that INTPs have Se Trickster, right? So that would be a thing, you know. So what do you do? Well, extrovert sensing inferior is able to help. Extrovert sensing inferior is also great because when they aspire they can get super mastery over fashion, INFJs are some of the best dressed types out there. Especially so basically NJ and NJs are amazing at fashion. Absolutely dope at fashion. And as Se Inferior is no exception, it’s like INTJs are also amazing at fashion, but INFJs can be really amazing at fashion. And thank God they exist because they can help the INFPs, usually weak on the fashion spectrum, but then they could talk to the Si Child and be like, Hey you should do this as Si Child. It is your duty to dress this way from now on Si Child.
And the INFJ trains, the INFP on how to dress better and the INFP will always remember that training. And then all of a sudden they’ve developed mastery of fashion finally, but they would have never been able to reach that point on their own. They had to always be trained to do it. Whereas the INFJ will arrive to fashionable and being fashionable on their own because they have a little bit of a Canticle mastery in and that’s why the INFJ in a relationship would be using the tools right more often than the INFP, unless the INFP has been specifically trained on how to use every tool for every task every single time. Whereas INFJ could potentially pick up a tool and just add, just intuitively know how to use it for example, and just, you know, use whatever tasks with it without necessarily any formal training, right? Whereas the INFP requires a training. That is the difference between introverted intuition plus extraverted sensing and introverted sensing plus extravert intuition is different because I see what you want to do, now I know what I should do. Or I see what you’re doing already now I know why I want to do it, because INFJs need to see what other people are doing before they want to do it themselves or they know what they want, so they show other people or tell other people that they should to do those things because they want to do it themselves already.
Whereas conversely, with the INFP they know what they should do, and because they’ve already done something they tell people, Hey, you would want to do this because I had a good experience doing it, that’s introverted sensing plus extroverted intuition, they are in access with each other, right. In the same way that extrovert sensing and introvert intuition are in access with each other. It literally comes out of our sentences, guys, our cognitive functions. Why are we not doing that? You know what I mean? It’s super important to be able to do that and have those things come out, for example. Okay, so we talked about Te for your house insecure about how other people think of them. We talked about extrovert sensing, which has performance anxiety and insecure about you know the experience they’re giving people, how they’re coming off you know, to the point where INFJs walk around with the INFJ whisper when they’re talking to people, you know, and there’s, they’re so quiet and they’re, so soft-spoken, it just makes me want to turn into Homer Simpson to start choking Bart Simpson whenever I see an INFJ do that.
And I’m like, and I get that, I literally do this, when I see an INFJ doing like the soft-spoken INFJ whisper to me, I look at them square in the eye and say, I’m sorry, but I’m really comfortable around you as it is already, you know? Cause Si Inferior and I don’t want you to use your whisper anymore. I want you to do like enunciate yourself and like actually put some power behind your voice for once. You know, and I get that you’re so insecure that you might be coming off, you know, in some way shape or form or sounding badly or whatever it was some way shape or form. Maybe you hate your voice, but I like your voice and you’re unfair to yourself in that way. So in order for me to have a good experience from you maybe you should stop talking in that little whisper that you do. It’s really annoying. And thank God INFPS would actually agree with me because they be constantly looking at the INFJs and be like, what are you saying? What are you saying? What are you saying? What are you saying?
And I think the INFJ would finally like get it and adjust themselves appropriately. But instead of like waiting for an INFP or an NFP to tell you, maybe you should just adjust that for yourself now, because note that like half the population of the planet out there like to hear what you have to say and like your voice. So maybe you should just like, get over yourself and do that, that, that would do us all a favor, thank you very much. Okay. Now we’re getting into the shadow. I understand this lecture is pretty long, but we’re we’re almost done here. And again, this is the most asked, most requested lecture here on the channel, so it is important that I’d put in as much effort as I can into it so that we have it. We’re coming up on 52 minutes so far so let’s just keep going. So extrovert intuition nemesis, the nemesis is where so insecurities and the inferior functions in the fourth slot, but the nemesis is where a persons worries is. The fist slot is where a person’s worry is. And INFJ worry about other people’s futures. They worry about other people’s intentions, other people’s desires. This can cause an INFJ to consistently consistently accuse their lover of cheating on them, even though their lover is not doing it, because they think that they have this magical ability to read the stars and all the stars are aligning, and I see these, these these events happening and they’re lining up and then you’re obviously cheating on me.
And I’m obviously jumping to conclusions about your intent and that is so alienating. It is a wonder why INFJs get broken up with and they’re like, well, why, what did I do wrong? It’s like, well, maybe it’s because you jump to conclusions about people’s intent. It’s one of the reasons why I broke up with an INFJ at one point in time, because she kept on jumping to conclusions about my intent and assuming consistently what I’m doing. Thank God INFPs don’t do that, its another difference between INFJs and INFPs, they don’t assume attention intent because Si Child will wait and they’ll see an event that happens. And they’ll see another event and they’ll wait three, four, five, six times until they know for a fact that their Fi hero is like this is bad because I see a pattern of behavior here. There, they are obviously cheating on me and a lot of time has passed and then they’ll throw up their boundaries and be like, you know what? This relationship is over.
This is no good anymore and they will walk out. INFJ, however, they think they can read the stars because they know what they want. And they, and they know what they want so much. They for some reason believe other people want things in as much as they do but they worry about what other people want because they know they’re very heroic with what they want but when it comes to others they’re worried about what other people want. And they’re worried that the INFP is going to betray them. That doesn’t happen, guys. Yes, I understand the virtue and vice is loyalty versus, you know disloyalty for anyone INFPs. But then when they reached that disloyalty point, a lot of time had to pass. The pattern of behavior had to have been there, you know and as long as they’re not deprived, they’re not going to leave their INFJ counterpart or you know, that relationship at all. They’re just not going to because they’re loyal to a fault, to the point of almost becoming a doormat with their INFJ lover, for example.
The only time when they’re being truly disloyal is if they’re so deprived and they’re so selfish that their Te Inferior thinks that this person that they would leave you for and jump with someone else would just increase their personal status. Kind of like a group yet concert, if you know what I’m saying. INFPs do this, right? But that doesn’t happen very often. They would have to be super deprived. And if you’re an INFJ and you got in a relationship with an INFP, you would have breathed fire on them by then and criticize them and allow it, burn the depravity way by burning the whys away, and then they become their own person, right? And then as a result of that, they are a better person and that makes them even more loyal to you, so then the chances of them betraying you is even like, it’s nil. It’s not going to happen, right?
Especially if you’re continually not insecure about giving them a good experience or not. And if you, as an INFJ are devoted to giving INFP such a good experience, you’re not gonna have a problem, because that just makes them more endeared to you. Your Fe Parent is making them feel good and your Se Inferior is making Si Child receive goods sensation and is always comfortable around you. it’s just gonna generate even more loyalty in the INFP, so they’re not going to betray you, even though they do not, even though they have that vice of disloyalty. But that vice only comes out of they’re depraved and selfish, which only comes out of their more, if they care more about their status than their relationship with you. Which if you’ve gotten a relationship with them, you would have burned that away using your Ti Child because you’re literally verifying everything they do.
Because remember INFJs, you trust what people say but you need to verify what they do and say, you have to verify everything, trust but verify an ISTP taught me this. Ti hero, verify everything with Ti. Everything in your life you need to verify, pull out your phone look it up in front of the person, you’re arguing with them. You need to verify everything. If you are not verifying INFJs, you are at risk of being worthless and useless. You know that thing that you already believe you are worthless and useless. You can be less worthless and useless if you’d actually remember to devote yourself to verifying everything in your life. Trust what people say, but always verify. This is the curse of the NFJ. NFJs need to figure out to verify every little thing in their life, because if they don’t verify they’re at risk of having their ass hanging out in the wind and getting completely screwed over or potentially having someone being this loyal to them. Now, just remember, verification does not give you a right to invade other people’s privacy. So remember, there’s a balance.
INFJs consistently violate other people’s privacy because of extrovert intuition nemesis, because they’re worried about the intention of others. And this is what causes INFJs especially INFJ women to read other people’s phones. It is super disrespectful and it’s super wrong. And it’s like, wow, why do I? And then it makes the INFP for example, be like, get an a why bother syndrome. It’s like, why bother being so loyal to this person if they’re just going to assume that I’m disloyal to them. And that creates a self-fulfilling prophecy which causes the INFJ to create disloyalty in the INFP. And because they’re so worried about this loyalty, they’re creating this loyalty it’s called a self fulfilling prophecy and INFJs do it all the time. How many INFJs are what? Real INFJs are watching this lecture right now and be like, that’s right. I totally alienated that person because I assumed they were disloyal in reality they weren’t, and I’m way worse off in my life and had I still been with that person 10 years ago, I would have been way better off.
Wow, yeah, nice to get a reality check sometimes. So INFPs, they worry about how other people value them. They value themselves so much. They do it in such a heroic way but they worry that others do not value them in that way or that other’s value systems are broken or that other people are corrupted. This is nice because INFPs if they detect the corruption because they worry about the INFJ corrupting, they will go to the INFJ and they will make sure that the INFJ is behaving ethically which they should be doing cause they do it from a responsible standpoint from an Fe Parent. But the INFP is going to make sure that, you know because they’re worried about the ethical behavior of the people that the INFJ is definitely behaving ethically especially towards them themselves. Sometimes the INFP does not necessarily care as much if you know the INFJ is behaving unethically towards other people because potentially those other people don’t deserve it. But when it comes to them personally, they really take that very seriously.
And they just want to make sure that Fe Parent from the INFJ is consistently treating them well and always seeking to make them feel better about themselves because if they’re not, that’s gonna cause a problem because Fe nemesis is aware of that. Also IFPs do not respond really well to guilt, but they can be guilted, and that can be a problem. So just be aware of that, watch out for the guilt. And although INFJs like their default setting is guilt. They’re literally walking around guilt machines, the guilt slots. Be aware of that because Fe Parent’s all about guilt and to the point where INFJs can be guilt in the things where they’re motivated to fix problems that may not actually be exists because they’ve been made guilty. And that’s why, again INFJ is you have to verify everything because someone could be taking advantage of your emotional health and manipulating you through guilt. So it makes sure you are verifying what people say before you allow yourself to feel guilty. This is super important for any and every NFJ out there, you need to know this. And then INFJ is have Fi Critic, Fi Critic cause their sense of morals, this is what their super, super mega principled things. This is the source of their integrity.
They need to be as integrity, have as much integrity as possible. They have a super high moral standard that they themselves can’t even meet, and it’s kinda weird because it kinda can make them come off as hypocritical. And not only that, this function can be super dangerous because while they’re providing the most integrity in the world, which is awesome because we need integrity from INFJ more than anything else because their integrity is examples by which we can live our lives and movement star and worlds change as a result of that super high integrity coming from the Fi Critic. The problem is, is that their moral standard that they hold themselves as so high that they actually force it on other people. And when you, as an INFJ force super high sense of morals, your perfectionistic morals on other people, guess what? You alienate them. And it’s no wonder INFJs are like, Whoa, I’m alone, It’s because you’re alienating people. Stop alienating people. Your super high moral standard that you have can really only be applied yourself and you apply it.
You try to apply to the INFP, the INFP is like, no, my morals are kind of better. My principles, my morals are kinda actually even higher than yours and I have my own set and you have to respect my set. And the INFJ is like, Oh yeah, you’re right, I definitely should. I definitely want to respect that. In fact, teach me a little bit more about your morals so that I can actually improve my morals and, and have even better and more clearer standard that I could follow for myself, you know, et cetera, without alienating other people. See, that’s the problem with Fi Credit, Fi credit can alienate others. And it’s one of the reasons why INFJs are alone in the world, and that’s why INFJs end up going with low quality people because those low quality people are low-hanging fruit that are available to the INFJ, because JINFJ doesn’t want to be alone because in a more love language is quality time, but you can’t get the love language, quality time with people because you’re not around people because you alienate them. So then, because you’ve alienated all the good people in your life, you may are going for the low hanging fruit, which ends up, you end up having friends with low quality people like, you know drug addicts and people that go are in and out of jail, for example or the list goes on.
People who are irresponsible with finances. People are irresponsible with their children, sexual abuse. It goes on. And then you INFJ is because you’re with these low quality low hanging fruit people, you end up becoming corrupted. Remember how I said, get the loser side of your life, there’s a reason for that because you’ve alienated people with your super high moral standard. And then you start and then you end up going for the low-hanging fruit people in your life because you’ve alienated the quality people in your life. And then you ended up mirroring them with your Fi Parent and your Se Inferior, and then need to become like them and then you become corrupted. Don’t do that. So how to prevent that? One, get the loser side of your life. Two, do not alienate people with your super high moral standard rep and recognize that your super high moral standard is just for you and nobody else. It’s an Fi function on Fe function. Stop using your Fe Parents to enforce your morals on other people, it is wrong. You need to lead by example by having integrity.
And only at that point, that shows integrity will people desire to have that same integrity you have. And then start to adopt your moral principles on their own willfully on their own, duty free on their own. Instead of you forcing it down their throats through your Fe Parent, that is wrong, do not do it. Fi Critic also causes INFJs to feel bad about themselves. Feel bad about themselves in such a way where they walk around feeling useless, worthless. They literally walk around believing that they’re bad people. INFJs you get depressed about that and all the time, Oh, I’m so depressed, I feel so worthless. Guess what?
That will never change. Fi Critical always be in your head and you will always feel worthless and useless for the rest of your life. You will never be able to escape it, I’m sorry. That’s just how it works for you people. And there’s nothing I could do about it except suggest the following. Always verify. If you feel worthless and useless, how about you become useful and worthy. You do this by improving other people. You do this by going the extra mile for others. You are an idealist, right? Help make the lives of other people more ideal. That is how you get over feeling so worthless. You’re not going to be satisfied. You may help somebody. You might get a momentary satisfaction and I’ll make you great but then the following day you’re going to feel worthless again. So you need to keep contributing to others every single day and verified and tell people the truth. Even if it hurts them, even if you’re breathing fire on them, fire of truth, or you have the double-edged sword coming out of your mouth like Jesus does the end at the world in the book of revelation, you know what I mean? And then an INFJ saving the world at the end of the world, where and how that is. Well, that’s only gonna happen if you keep telling the truth, you have to be willing to harm people with negative reinforcement. Negative reinforcement in the way is I have to criticize you because what you’re saying is wrong and yes it’s gonna hurt, but you’re gonna appreciate it, cause the lies got mined away. Never correct the fool though, right? Proverbs right?
Gosh, I’m using a lot of biblical references today, And Proverbs says, do not correct a fool or you will become one, right? I’m paraphrasing. But if you correct the wise man, he’ll thank you for it. Okay, that was like, I just jumped from old Testament, new Testament, like that but I mean, it’s the same message, come on, wisdom is wisdom. Yes I talk about biblical concepts on this channel all the time, but it’s not about me trying to be able to church you with you, I mean, I’ve talked about things from the Koran and you know, Eastern philosophy and I’m actually about to go really heavy to Taoism in in my season 13 lecture about human nurture and personal sovereignty. It’s going to be awesome.
I think my next lecture is about Taoism specifically and how the Tao of the human experience interacts with how our personalities work, our human nature, as well as life, as we know it with our human nurture, right? It’s gonna be absolutely awesome. And I recommend you watch that or listen to it. So just be aware of Fi Critic, you have to make sure that you are being useful to other people. And one of the ways you could do this is to burn the lies away or help them with mechanical things, help them with being more fashionable just help people, make yourself useful. INFJ is also, you had this insanely awesome logical Child, mastery of logos, mastery of logic, which means INFJ You can be some of the best most capable computer programmers that walk the earth. Guess what? Computer programming is one of the most useful skills, find and develop useful skills and then contribute to people, contribute to organizations that are trying to bring out about an, a better way for human beings, you know through technology or whatever else. As long as you’re contributing to something and you were making people better or making our race better then you don’t have to feel so useless or worthless all the time. And even then you may find a satisfying thing where you know, you’ve really helped somebody but then the next day because it’s no longer in your short-term memory is storing on your long-term memory, you start to feel worthless again.
Fill your life with totems, to remind you of all the good things you’ve done for other people, that also helps you fight the uselessness and the worthlessness feeling. Be aware of that. Do not create a such high moral standard for yourself that not even you can meet while simultaneously enforcing other people, it just leads to you being alone. And then after being alone you’ll start to Mirror low quality people because you don’t want to be alone. You’re willing to fill your life with lower quality people because you’d rather have lower quality people but not be alone, which just leads to your corruption which ends up destroying our race in the end. And then we won’t have that double-edged sword when we need it because it’s rusted and worthless. Don’t become that person. If you don’t want to be worthless and useless anymore get the losers out of your life. And, and don’t enforce your high moral standard and other people because it’d be less alienating. And I created IFPs do not allow themselves to want things, that’s why it’s almost nearly impossible to motivate and INFP to do anything.
And the only way to motivate them is to make them uncomfortable and their introverted sensing child. And thank God Se Inferior and Se Child exists from from INJ or from NFJ is to make INFPs uncomfortable in such a way, or it doesn’t break them. Although Se Parent and Se Hero could technically break INFPs in some cases, because just the sheer weight the sheer force of extrovert sensing at those levels, but you make them uncomfortable when they start to change. And they would also be motivated because guess what? This is one of the reasons why they ended up stuck in their comfort zone, why their comfort zone makes more sense to them instead of motivation because they see everyone else in the entire world is being irresponsible with what they want with their Ne Parent.
So they seriously are super critical of their own will and what they want themselves super, super critical that they do not allow themselves to want thing, right? And because they do not allow themselves to want things, because everyone else is so irresponsible, because they do not want to be seen as irresponsible about what they want themselves they ended up getting stuck, can this rut. So to do that, thank God we have Ne Nemesis who worries that the INFP may actually become stagnant, right? And they and the INFJ will actually start suggesting some options to the INFP, but they are not likely to accept it unless they are made uncomfortable first, unless they are made unhappy first. And then at that point they will start to accept those options and allow themselves to want things. We talked about Se Trickster already, with her lack of a fashion sense that has to be learned over time instead of just default known. And that includes like especially, the INFP women that includes you know, hair, clothing, shoes, all of it, they just need to be trained.
They’re not going to know fashion by default, they have to be trained in it. Whereas INFJ women, for example know it by default, is same with men. But again, there’s lack of extrovert sensing can actually be a good thing for INFPs their fashion sense in some ways because it comes off as really cute and endearing to a lot of people, especially in NFJs. But the NFJs even though they’re attracted to the NFPs by their cuteness, they will provide all of those things so that they the NFPs know about, okay this is the kind of things that I should have. This is what I should be wearing, you know at these certain times, et cetera. And they’re able to get, receive those trainings from the NFJs is like the INFJs for example. And then Ti Demon, Ti Demo is all about their sense of logos. This is the ISTP superego right here. Ti Demon is a problem and this is an ISTP a craftsman. If tease off Ti Demon, they’re gonna pick up the nearest instrument and just bash you in the head with it.
Oh, you can’t say that about me. I’m an INFP, I’m very moral person, I would never do that. No one’s ever made me so angry. Don’t even go there with me. I’m sorry, but this is your human condition. Everyone has the source of the human condition inside their souls and no one can escape it. It’s just that no one’s has pissed you off that bad to get to that point. I understand that. You know, it’s like Oh, you know, I believe that you, you know, I have my belief system, you weren’t even listening to my beliefs. You don’t even care about my beliefs. You don’t care. You know?
And, and because you don’t care about my beliefs you’re making me feel bad constantly. And how do you think so little of me after I’ve contributed to you after I’ve been so loyal to you, after I’ve given you everything that you wanted and I’d done such a good job, why do I even bother anymore? So you, you keep telling me about, you know how I used to be so truthful and you tell me that I’m a liar when in reality I’m not a liar, I know I’m not a liar. And I don’t feel that way about myself. And because you think that I’m a liar, fine I’m going to start really telling the truth. And they just go super truth mode and they pull up their logos. And their logos is a list of everything negative that has ever happened to them in this, this friendship or relationship that the ran with this other person. And they will criticize them unlike any way they’ve ever criticized them before. And they know exactly every pressure point to hit. It is to the point where it’s masterful and they will they will exist to destroy the reality of the Ti Demon or exist to destroy the reality of the person that they’re targeting at that point in time. Remember the super ego is the source of evil and the human condition within the human soul.
And it will destroy everything and is insanely powerful. And it will light the house on fire. It will destroy the physical environment around them when they’re in this rage, a Ti Demon mode, because it’s an ISTP and ISTP is rage, and they get upset because they have to react to the situation in that moment because they put off reacting for so long, that’s Si Child of there, Si Child endurance that the Se Trickster activates, the Ti Demon activates and they just start reacting to it now. And they literally pull that hammer and go bam right in someone’s skull. You know what I mean? That can be a thing. So how to deal with that. Remember the super ego actually exists for it does have one good purpose. And that is a reset button on life. If you get completely stagnant in your life or if you end up feeling trapped or if you’re not able to get anywhere INFP sometimes you just have to press the big red button the nuclear option, and just explode and destroy your entire life and light your entire life on fire. This is super important. Jesus and INFJ said, he who is willing to save his life or tries to save his life will lose it. But he who is willing to get to lose his life will gain it. You have to be willing to light your life on fire at times in order to save your life, you have to be willing to go that far.
If you are not willing to go that far you will stay stagnant. You will stay in your comfort zone and you will not grow. You will be left behind and you will be miserable and you will be unhappy. Sometimes you have to be willing to sacrifice everything you have in order, you know, and burn your boats, for example, using the Cortez example in history you have to be willing to burn your boats in order have to force yourself to have the self-discipline to grow because introverted sensing is an INFP. you need to realize it’s not about what you want. Never asked an INFP child, for example, or any child for that example, what do you want to be when you grow up? No, no, no. You need to ask the child is what are you going to do to meet your own needs when I am no longer going to meet your own needs?
And that develops self-discipline as Si Child INFP is you need to be devoted to self discipline because to self-discipline you are forcing yourself to grow. You’re forcing yourself to fail for the sake of learning wisdom. You are forcing yourself to read. You are forcing yourself to do things that you don’t like to do, because guess what? Life is not about what you like. Life is not about you being comfy. You guys can get so deprived and so selfish sometimes because, well I don’t like that or that doesn’t make me comfortable, so I’m not going to do it. That’s not how life works. That is not how the ideal works. You want to bring the ideal in? You have to be willing to suffer for it first. And that means you have to be willing to destroy your life at times and light it on fire so that new life can grow up from the ashes, the Phoenix, that’s what the superego exists for. Otherwise, if you ignore it it will start coming out and it will corrupt you and your evil will be there, and then it will lead to depravity. You can’t do this.
So you have to verify your beliefs while you have a hard time doing that because Ti Demon is not going to verify your beliefs. So you have to team up with NFJs or Ti users around, it could be an ISTP or NSTP to verify your beliefs. So you talk about your beliefs with those people, share your beliefs with people and get their thoughts on it. So, you know, whether or not you need to adjust yours or not and test yourself in this way and be devoted to self discipline. INFPs need to be self-disciplined, it’s the only way you will be successful. Let’s talk about success for the INFB ESTJ subconscious, if you get over your security for other people, think of you and you devote yourself to study, devote yourself to reading and reading and reading and reading and reading you will become the ESTJ overseer and this will be amazing.
You basically become like this professor someone who is able to profess all these things and you become a teacher and you teach people how to think differently about things. You teach people about history and you master the first block of time. All of this happened before will happen again. You’ll be able to show people to think differently about the future and help bring this ideal world into existence that you are constantly imagining in your mind, because the INFP, you spent so much time in their dream world, you know their ideal world that is not really based in reality. But the only way for INFP is to really bring it to reality, they need to read and become the professor, the overseer the ESTJ, to oversee the thoughts of others in their life with their core personal inner philosophy.
And then as a result of that, there will be mass social change at the micro level but if they don’t give up, it will be at the macro level. And guess what? The INFJ will pick up that philosophy and run with it and take it everywhere in the same way Gandhi did compared to his closest friends and his mentor, huh? INFJs, Te trickster, Te stricture of the INFJ is not aware of what other people think. This is what this is why when they start sharing, what they think with other people that aren’t even aware that other people have already fought those things. And it can be a little bit alienating for INFJs. INFJs, you guys just have to realize that sometimes you need to shut up or that some people are not really interested in hearing what you think because they’ve already thought it. So instead what you need to do, verify ask people questions. Hey, I know things about this subject. What do you know about the subject? Ask people first, because then by asking, you know that you’re not going to Te Trickster them. People are not aware of what you think and they and you are not aware of what they think. So you have to tell people what you’re thinking obviously and please do that but make sure that you’re verifying them, make sure that you’re not alienating them because they may already know more about that subject than you do and you’re just not aware that they even know.
The other thing is don’t label people like INFJ if you start labeling people and think that you got a label attached to the thing, you’re wrong you’re actually wronger more than anyone more than any of the other types, you were wrong. Labels, reliant on NSPs to label things cause Te Inferior and Ti Child for NFPS are really capable of labeling things properly. Let them figure out the categories let them figure out the spreadsheets, for example. Let them figure out the mathematical processes to follow on paper. You can do everything in your head anyway. So that’s a different it’s another differences between INFPs and INFJs. Mathematics from an INFP standpoint, they could do everything on paper and show all their work because they’re following a process outside of themselves with extra thinking. INFJ is needed the room to be able to process mathematics mentally in their own head without necessarily writing it on paper, because as soon as they try to write it on a paper they fail because Te Trickster won’t let them. I
NFJs need to be allowed especially in education systems and in schools to be able to do mathematics in their head, because guess what? They’ll be able to do that. My son he’s turning seven, he is an INFJ. Okay. He, he’s never been taught, addition, subtraction, multiplication, he’s going into first grade, okay? And guess what? He’s about to turn seven and he’s doing multiplication on his own because his logical Ti Child figured out how to do mathematics. Logically, it just makes sense to them by default. And he’s already doing multiplication in his head. We’ve seen him do it. He’s doing these, these, the these he’s doing arithmetic already, he hasn’t even been taught how to do it. It’s because INFJs need to be able to have the freedom to do it in their own head without being expecting to put it on paper. If you do that to INFJs they’re going to fail because they have Te Trickster. Society stop hurting our children. It’s a stupid, and I’m tired of this fatherless generation where you don’t worry. You have so many ignorant men who are having children and they are not able to go into schools and change the schools and hold the schools accountable for this crap. And it’s hurting our children.
We need to not allow this to happen. ISFJs and INFJs both struggle with this issue. We cannot allow the system or the society to harm our children anymore, or this crap. We can’t do it, it is wrong. We cannot do this. It is not fair. It is not right. Protect the Te Tricksters, give them the freedom to think everything on their own, in their own heads is super important. And then Si Demon, Si Demon manifests where the ISTJ comes out and the IMFJ ALEKS themselves, judge, jury, and executioner. They think they know so much about everything in this negative situation. And they’re like, yeah, you were never loyal to me. You were, you were supposed to be loyal to me because loyalty is the number one need of the INFJ. we know where’s the INFP supposed to be loyal the INFJ needs someone loyal to them. That’s another difference between the two types. Loyalty has everything.
And the demon Si Demon is, you know, it’s like, well since you’re not loyal to me, I’m a loyal to myself. And then they cut that person off Or judge, jury, and executioner. You’re dead to me. And it’s as if they’ve executed that person mentally, because remember we talked about totems, that person carries a lot of memories for the INFJ because that person is literally a tony mars set of totems. And they have to remove the totem in order for them to deal with the emotional trauma is super important. I mean, that’s what happened to me with my mentor, RP Morrell, who taught me a lot of what I know about psychology. He couldn’t get over the emotional trauma of our relationship and the problems that we had in our relationship and our friendship. And he was not fulfilled or satisfied by it. So we had to cut ties and those of ties are cut to this day specifically because he couldn’t get over that trauma because I had become a totem.
And every time he looked at me, he would just be reminded that this is another reason why parents, you know when they have, when they, when they get pregnant and you know, having children have a child coming up with the child dies, right. Or when they have a small child and that child gets kidnapped and they find out that the child was kidnapped and they found the buyer their child later, and that child is dead. Right. And just, and then, and then just looking at each other there, one of them could be an INFJ or an ISTP and then they, it just reminds them of their child that they lost. And they looked through the person, they end up divorcing because of that reminder, this is why it’s because of the extrovert sensing totemic effect.
Be aware of how totems work and be aware of their power and aware of those dangers. You weren’t loyal to me so I’m gonna be loyal to myself. And then yeah, ISTJ comes out and then just blows everything up. Remember the superego is this to be the red button that you press to reset your life. So INFJ is, this is where you start cutting out the looseness of your life, reset your life burn it to the ground. New life will come take back your integrity and move forward and no longer be useless no longer be worthless, verify everything. We need you to speak the truth. We need you to breathe that fire upon us and to tell us the truth and to criticize us because that criticism will make us grow because you’re cutting the fat away. You’re cutting the lies away. You’re burning the lies away. It’s just what hell fire is. Hell fire equals truth. They’re just burning the lies away so that we can be better people. That’s why we suffer here on this planet.
This is why there is pain of life on this planet. Something INFPS thing to figure out, Oh why is there so much pain and everything as well? Because pain exists to teach us. Suffering exists to teach us. We are being turned into diamonds. Diamonds are caught or created through pressure through pain, through suffering, through heat, through fire. How can we be diamonds? We are trying to become diamonds. That’s why we exist in this reality is to make us better to make us diamonds, to make us valuable. If you had a perfect diamond is worthless. So in reality, our imperfection is actually on the way to becoming perfect on the way of becoming precious. Our imperfection is precious. That is important to understand when we’re talking about the diamonds, that diamonds are super mega important, the most valuable substance on this planet and they’re made of carbon, Oh, wait. We’re made of carbon. Understand the difference. We need to have the fire of Ti Child from INFJs to burn the lies away that hell fire to burn wisely so that we can be on diamonds. Because remember, I cannot comfort you into wisdom. Wisdom is the most valuable substance in all of everything in the universe.
Wisdom is the most valuable thing. You cannot find anything more valuable than wisdom that you only get wisdom through having your lives burnt away by coming towards the truth. And you can’t get closer to the truth, the fires of truth which is so hot and so painful, but you need to get it because it is so cleansing and it’s so free because the truth will set you free. And that’s what it is to be a diamond, be precious. And you know what? It’s okay, that you’re flawed. It’s okay, that you’re imperfect diamond. INFJ’s, especially, you have all types to desire to be perfect more than anybody else with the exception of maybe IMTJ, but still you desire it but that’s because you want to be perfect, but understand that your journey towards trying to become perfect. If that’s really what you want you’re actually making yourself more worthless. You need to understand that your imperfection needs to be celebrated and recognized that your suffering and the suffering of others especially other people that you tell the truth to is for their benefit. It is to make them into diamonds. It is to bring them wisdom because wisdom makes them more beautiful. Remember a perfect diamond is worthless. Don’t make that mistake. So many have, and so many have paid for it. Reality checks, another way you can breathe fires reality tests. This is provided through ESTP sub-conscious, ESTP subconscious is super important. When you are no longer insecure about giving other people bad experience you’re able to start reality checking people.
ESTPs are like the alpha, you become the alpha woman or the alpha male the INFJ with your ESTP subconscious and you will have a Wolf pack, a Wolf pack that follows you. People who are super loyal to you, see people who are super devoted to you people would take a bullet for you. People will do anything for you because you would do anything for them. And because you have spent time improving them and burning the lies away and telling them the truth and building them up as human beings and improve him because you are not useless, you are not worthless because you are contributing to them every single day. And there’s never a chance for you to become unsatisfied because you’re able to meet those challenges for those people, because you care about them every single day, your Wolf pack. And no, I am not talking about furry ism or other kin. I’m talking about having a family of close friends outside of your blood relatives. And you could do that. And, you know, Jesus had that, he had the 12 disciples think about that. He had plenty of other followers, but they all fell away, right? Think about Gandhi, he had tons of followers that were specifically following him, really, really huge devotees. There’s a reason for that. Recognize the power of the ESTP subconscious. And you can have that. You just have to get over your performance anxiety. You have to be willing to verify absolutely everything.
You have to be responsible with your ethics not allow your moral superiority to alienate other people. You have to be righteous with your integrity and not be corrupt, so you need to get the losers out of your life. And if you do all those things, you will be able to bring about your ESTP and have your Wolf pack and you will become some of the most powerful most influential INFJ that the world’s ever seen to the point where you were literally able to snap your fingers and change culture as we know it in the same way that INFJ is in ancient times have. such as the way of the INFJ.
That concludes this episode on how INFJ is compared to INFPs. If you found this lecture useful, helpful, educational please subscribe to the channel here on YouTube or, and and also on the podcast. Leave a like while you’re at it, do you have any questions about INFPs or INFJs please leave in the comments section and I’ll do my best to answer your comments. I read absolutely every comment on this channel and I try to interact and engage everybody as best as possible. Also, we have a discord server, I do Q and A sessions probably about twice a month on the discord server. My next one is scheduled for next Friday. So a week from yesterday, basically, and we’ll be doing a Q and A session there, just go onto the discord hangout. Please observe the rules, try to like be nice if you can. And, and then leave also your questions for me that you would like to have answered in the Q and A session. My associate Alex will be putting it together and we’ll be doing a live stream of that here on YouTube where you can actually be present for that on on the discord server as well. And we’re definitely going to be engaged with plenty of people there and it’s going to be fantastic. So, yeah. Otherwise thank you all for being my audience. I saw that we broke a 4,000 subscribers and that is absolutely fantastic. And I very much look forward to what we were able to accomplish together. Moving forward into the future. Thank you very much and we’ll see you guys tonight.