cs joseph responds
Welcome to CS Joseph Responds, I’m your host Chase, here to answer your questions on anything Jungian analytical psychology or the Four Sides the Mind, also known as Four Sides Dynamics. And the source of today’s question is none other than Quora, So how do I make an ISFP happy? So, good old Quora has presented us with two answers. So we have Sabrina Elke who is a partner at humanity. And she says, I’m not ISFP but I have much experience with them as both my mom and sister are this type. I doubt that. I’ve gathered some of what they say and some of what I think to be true as well. Anyways, give them their own space. Now sure many types might enjoy this, but ISFP love to linger in their own presence, and they don’t like this one is disrespected and also like to give others their own space. This is actually very fair, and that’s a good point. So yeah, good point Sabrina. And then sensory experiences, she says with an exclamation point. I find that most ISFPs have a knack for some artistic talents and interests, so naturally they search for these things. My mom not only cooks, but you can truly feel the heart and passion that goes into every bite. Other things might include music, going out to eat, carnivals and other general activities like that. Okay, this is not exactly accurate. She really should be saying shared experiences not really sensory experiences. Any experience can be appropriate to an ISFP, it’s just who they’re sharing it with. It’s all about giving other people an experience or sharing experiences with other people. That’s more ISFP. Then she says being with loved ones. Okay, I found that even though my ISFPs love their own space, if they really like you they’ll let you into it, my sister will often walk into my room and just sit next to me not saying anything. She feels perfectly comfortable laying next to others in silence, all that jabber isn’t needed sometimes. Okay. Whatever. Allow them their own pace. Okay, I have to admit I found these types to be extremely slow in getting things done. Preach it woman, yes, Sabrina knows for a fact that ISFPs are slow AF, that’s just reality. My sister often tells me that she doesn’t want to be forced to do anything like cleaning and would rather just come up with the idea of doing it. But that means cleaning would only happen twice a year, ha, anyways, once they get to do it, it’s usually perfect. Okay, so Sabrina is basically aware at this point of the virtue and vice of ISFPs which is being idle for example, or being extremely diligent and getting a lot of things done, so they kinda go back and forth. The next answer is provided by Joshua Servants, or Servanci, who has survived depression, depersonalization and eating disorders. Well, he definitely hasn’t survived feminism, that’s for sure. Geez, how many times have I writ this disclaimer anyway, answering is a hybrid IFSP/INFP. Results may not be typical smiley face, I will take that smiley face and step on it. But these things are. But these are things that make me the most happy. Okay, alone time, music, singing, people, genuine connection with others, acting, movies, spontaneous activity, the right kind of surprises, whatever, harmony between peers, sometimes I’ll literally just stop talking, sit back and enjoy communicating peacefully, that is until someone notices me, recognition of my work not necessarily me, finally figuring a person out, helping anyone without receiving too much praise, any extreme sport, journaling, more alone time, deep interpersonal conversations with any loved one especially alone. You know those conversations have a million, oh my gosh, he just keeps going, stupid deep pillow talk. Wow. All right, bro. You’re not an ISFP. You’re an INFP. Why are you commenting here? Please, please get us away from this, I will right now. Awesome. So, what makes an ISFP happy? The first thing that you can do to make any ISFP happy, I mean this is like, imagine you’re in a bar and you see this ISFP woman there that you’ve typed because you’re an expert at the type grid by now, and you understand interaction styles and temperaments and cognitive axes, as well as quadra. You see this ISFP girl sitting alone at the bar just hanging out because her friend just went to the bathroom or whatever, and she’s just like huh, hmm. Well, interesting pickup line. You go right up to her and just be like, hey. Wow, I think pretty highly of you. Why, why do you think highly of her? So comment on how she’s dressed, or comment on how artistic she is, or maybe she’s drawing something, comment on that. But you basically say, hey, I think that’s cool or I think you’re cool, I think this, you have to be like, I think something positive. This goes directly for her extroverted thinking inferior. And if you ever wanna make someone super happy, you target their inferior and you give their inferior what it’s desperately looking for, and it immediately sets you apart from other people. Here’s another thing that makes them happy. They are so worried about being caring so you show them gratitude for how caring they are because they’re worried that they’re actually very selfish people because they kind of technically are, let’s be honest, it’s like Fi hero. But, they can be very giving because they often worry about whether or not they’re giving. So be aware of that, you know what I’m saying? They like to live in the moment. So here’s another way. If you wanna pick up this ISFP girl in the bar just be like, yo, hey, I’m gonna go do this thing, do you wanna come with me? It’s that simple. You just give her the choice. Hey, do you wanna come with? I’m gonna do this, you wanna come with? I mean, especially if you’re a man, you should be making yourself your own mental point of origin, it’s all about what you’re doing and you just invite her to come with you and she’s kind of like a side piece to what you’re doing, essentially, and that’s how you can have a really good relationship with an ISFP woman for example. So why not, why wouldn’t you, right? So yeah, I mean that’s how you make an ISFP happy in general. But yeah, always make sure that you’re telling them that you think highly of them for some reason, always be willing to drop something for them at an instant, because, SE users especially SPs love it when the people around them stop everything they’re doing for them and it makes an ISFP feel very, very important whenever you stop paying attention to whatever you’re paying attention to, and then you give them your attention, because ISFPs, they love them attention, I mean they’re kind of like attention whores, let’s be honest and they love them some attention so give them attention, it makes them feel good, you know I’m saying? Always give them freedom of choice, always give them choices, just make sure whatever choices you give them benefit you. #Xanatos Gambit, but the bottom line is, as long as you give them choices and give them freedom they’re good. assuage their worries by saying that they’re a very caring person, right? Again, tell them that you think highly of them, they really love that. Also, anytime they actually remember something, praise them for that. Gosh, ISFPs love them some praise, you know what I’m saying? Recognize that they kind of just are not aware of other people’s intentions, so protect them. If you see someone who has dark intentions towards an ISFP, provide them warnings, because it makes them feel safe, and they just they love it even more and actually you keeping them safe actually creates loyalty inside of an ISFP towards you. It’s amazing. Again, tell them that you think highly of them. In fact, tell other people that you think highly of them so it gets back to them. And either do it in front of them, or do it behind their back, but then it comes back to them, because let’s be honest folks, ISFPs live, and they live for credit, they live for credit, they always gotta have themselves them credit, you know what I’m saying? Always gotta have that credit, credit is everything to an ISFP, especially when it comes to their art, and signing their name to art for example. I actually just got an amazing painting sent to me by an ISFP woman from Europe, for example, I’m gonna be putting it up here behind here real soon, as soon as I can either convince my parents to ship it to me or maybe I have to drive out to their house to actually pick it up, but it’s a fantastic, amazing piece, and I’m very happy to have been given it and I’m gonna be hanging up on the wall. But, when she signed her name to it, okay? So, again, their name, their brand, their status, their reputation is everything to an ISFP, so you need to be going out of your way to support that status as often as possible. And if you do this, the ISFP will literally be like so happy to say, oh, there’s no one like you out there, et cetera and you’ll be the best of friends because they just love it. Come on guys read the book, Dale Carnegie wrote, “How to Win Friends and Influence People,” all you got to do is to get people to talk about themselves, if you get an ISFP to talk about themselves very easily, all you have to do is just comment on their status, comment on their reputation in a positive way or their art, et cetera, get them to talk about their art, get them to talk about what they’re doing, right? That’s basic standard psychology. Check out the Dale Carnegie’s book if you haven’t.