Season 1, Episode 1 Transcript
CS Joseph Responds to the Acolyte question how can I develop my Ti parent?
Hey what’s up you ackers. Welcome to the CS Joseph podcast? Today’s episode, we’re gonna be discussing how to develop your TI parent, which is a great question. Oftentimes, people don’t really understand the strategy that they could utilize to develop their parent functions. And while the strategy kind of ends up being the same overall, from parent by parent, the application is completely different.
So I could totally understand why, you know, this question bears relevance, because there’s a lot of confusion out there as to what is the best way to do it. So like, for example, ti parent, it’s apparent function, parent functions are pessimistic. But the other aspect of the parent functions, and if you haven’t watched it already, I think I think it might be season 16, which is cognitive attitudes, I believe. If you haven’t watched that, yet, you probably should watch that.
But the point is, understanding like the role of the parent function, it’s, it’s still the last cognitive function that develops within your ego. So like, from a psychological perspective, it’s the one function that people have the most difficult time developing, you know, throughout their life. So the reason why is because like, when a person is born, the first function that forms is ultimately the hero function, followed by their child function, because they’re both the optimistic functions. And then after that, the Inferior function is what actually starts developing as the first is the first pessimistic function.
And then the parent is the final function to start developing within a person’s ego. And the parent function doesn’t really begin like it turns on, but it’s underdeveloped in adolescence, basically, that’s not to say that, you know, children can’t use their parent functions they can, but it’s, it’s even way more underdeveloped as is, and really, you know, oftentimes people equate development of parent functions to, you know, just their age, basically. But that’s not entirely, that’s not entirely accurate. It’s really not, it’s only it’s, there’s different ways to develop your parent.
And, you know, oftentimes, you know, this is why people struggle with teenagers when they’re raising teenagers, because parents are trying to get their children to be more responsible, which means that their parent functions would have to be behaving responsibly, because the parent function is ultimately where a person gains their personal responsibility for themselves within their life. The thing is, though, is that when parents start trying to develop the parent function and encourage the parent function within their children, their children end up lashing out, they end up fighting back. And ultimately, that’s the cause as to why teenagers can be such a problem to deal with when they’re in adolescence, because they just don’t really know what to do, the parent function is so new and their ego is finally protecting itself. Now to learn more about this, I highly recommend you become a member of CS joseph.ly, forward slash members or CS joseph.ly, forward slash portal, go to the journeyman section become a journeyman member, it’s only like 29 bucks a month, and at least seven weeks of binge worthy content, but there’s years worth of content in it.
But you know, current record of of an INTJ binging it day in and day out, is about seven weeks, trying to increase that to eight weeks. And who knows. We’ll we’ll get it more with so much content there. I’m hoping to get like it’ll take an entire year for someone to binge, all that it’s just be so much but who knows.
Yeah, go check that out. The reason I mentioned that, though, is because the parent lectures are in there how to parent XYZ type. They’re really, really important. If you’re a parent, if you have a child or if you’re planning on being a parent one day, or maybe you yourself are a child, you don’t have children yet, and you kind of want to learn how to parent yourself.
I highly recommend you check out his lectures. They’re very, very important. And they basically hit all of the psychological buttons necessary. In order for you to parent yourself or become a better parent for children you already have provided you actually know what their psychological type actually is.
Now, anyway, people People often think that just age is necessary to develop a parent function. Or sometimes people also think when a person leaves their family and their ego is finally free from the family have their own place their own job, their own purpose, their own thing their own life, basically, apart from their nuclear family or their immediate family that their parent function will develop. And that’s that’s also false. That’s really fun.
I also like for those who are members of the ego hacker community, oftentimes they think that, you know, via cognitive axis, if I focus on developing my child function, my parent function will naturally develop as well. And that’s not necessarily the case, when it comes to develop finishing out your ego development, you know, in terms of your parent function, that’s not exactly always the case. I found out that personally like and this I have to admit, you know, this is where, you know, some of my own personal bias can actually come into play here. Because my extroverted feeling child, my inner child was ultimately rejected, rejected by my immediate family, rejected by my extended family, my nuclear family, rejected by the church rejected by all my peers at school growing up, and also entirely rejected in my 20s.
So as a result of that, my child function is very underdeveloped. And it’s also like, I mean, it’s developmentally behind it. So development mentally behind that I just decided to just stop really, using my child function, I tried to stop developing it and decided to go in a different pathway. And this has caused me to become an unconscious developed unconscious focused ENTP, with my Archigram.
I explained this heavily in the members area, especially the cutting edge podcast episode, from August 2022. I highly recommend you guys watch that episode because it lays down the foundation of aqua Graham, as well as my personal journey as to what OKT grant is aka Graham basically, is how we measure someone’s natural development and how it impacts their nature, their natural development within their personality type, aka gram is the CS Joseph version of INIA gram and it is the system that we’re going to be using instead of Enneagram for the ego hacker community. Again, if you want to get educated on that there’s two places and get educated on that and the members area for the cutting edge episode August 2022. Or you can join our Discord which is link tree, forward slash CS Joseph and then you hit the discord invites at the bottom of that list.
Li n k t r e dot e forward slash CS Joseph, you can go you can go get on our Discord server and then go into the discus aka Graham channel and read all of the pinned messages. As a result, you can start your journey on getting educated on Oct gram until such time we have it released or at least expanded upon within our companion guide, which I believe it will be out in the third edition or fourth edition second edition was just released on Bucha dot app. We have a new personality test on YouTube lots of new stuff like I don’t know trying to use this episode for announcements, but like seriously, like, get in there, check it out, get educated. But the companion guide third edition will have the temple stuff and then maybe third edition may continue to contain Dr.
Graham, it might we might have to wait till fourth edition before we have Dr. Graham added there to talk about human nurture. So anyway, understanding nurture is very important. And you know, this is why all parents are trying to nurture their children developing their parent functions, but it doesn’t work.
And like in my personal experience, and I could be speaking from bias here, using my expert feeling child’s consistently in an attempt to develop my parent, it’s just it just really hasn’t worked out for me. It’s possible that you know, through cognitive transition, like if I was more comfortable using my subconscious my iossef J side, which kind of forces my Extraverted Feeling child to become more parental and of its own right. And then as a result of that makes my TI to be more of a child so I end up using it more when I’m in cognitive transition to my subconscious. Yeah, sure, you could argue more use leads to more development of that cognitive function.
But I don’t really have a lot of anecdotal evidence to support that much less having evidence even for other people. I’m not I’m not entirely sure I’m just I’m just unsure so I’m gonna go with my personal experience here now I’m not to say are going to claim that this is how it is for everybody. But I know that it is one pathway that I know will work and that is targeting your critic function. Extroverted thinking critic.
If you’re a TI parent trying to develop a TI parent you need to actually focus all your effort on to Te critic and developing te critic because via cognitive orbit because the critic is linked through link to your TI parent via cognitive orbit. If you don’t know what cognitive orbit is, again, become a member go watch season 18 there’s multiple episodes discussing cognitive orbit and how it actually works. And you can kind of see how it is but extroverted thinking critic is attached to Introverted Thinking parents, and it can help develop your parent function from a teenager to a responsible parent. How? Well, first of all, if you’re a TI parent, you need to get off your ass and you start reading books, nonfiction books, specifically, it’s not good to have to read fiction.
And you also want to read books that you disagree with that you already know that you disagree with their point, you know, you disagree with the author, you don’t like the author, you have to force yourself to take an input that you don’t like, or you don’t you don’t agree with you don’t think is true? Because what this does is this helps you develop the skill of critical thinking. And if you could develop the skill of critical thinking with your extroverted thinking critic, you will naturally be able to develop critical thinking with your TI parent, which will cause your TI parent to become more responsible over time. Okay. It is a thing it can work.
It, you know, it is a guaranteed outcome. While this is like it’s a long journey. I do know and EMTP his name’s Noah, shout out to Noah. Love you, bro.
But Noah, he seems to have his ti parent developed more than most people. But I don’t I’m not entirely sure he did it with his te critic approach. I think he probably did it through cognitive transition, like I was saying a few minutes ago. But because he’s he’s very subconscious developed as an intp is very different from me being unconscious developed, I’m more developed on my INTJ side of my mind, whereas he’s more developed on his ISFJ side of his mind.
So there’s some huge differences there. I’m not saying that, you know, my way is the only way or the best way. I’m just saying it works. That’s all I’m saying guaranteed outcome for TI parent development, read books, develop critical thinking, challenge everything.
But challenge alone, it’s not good enough, you have to challenge but then figure out why you’re challenging. And then when you challenge verify your challenge, should I be challenging this? Why am I challenges? Is this a good idea? Is this responsible for me to do, you got to look into that you got to you got to consider, you got to consider that risk with your thinking. Because responsible thinking is about handling input properly. Here’s the other thing.
If you’re not going out of your way to ask for input from other people and ask other people what their opinions are in your life, you’re not being responsible for your TI parent, because then you’re just walking around being a TI teenager who thinks you know everything, or you’re just being a noodle. And it’s one of the biggest criticisms Chris Taylor has of me, he’s been trying to encourage me to ask other people my opinion about or their opinion about other people that I allow in my life before I allow those people in my life, so I can be more responsible, make better decisions, and not drag everyone else down with me. Right. And that’s an area where he’s a member of the soul temple, the soul temple cares about character, and he’s trying to develop my character, my personal character better as a result, okay? That’s like how he’s trying to contribute to me using his INFJ shadow development, to be able to help me grow as a person, right? By providing challenge in that area.
So yeah, it’s all about critical thinking. And developing critical thinking, you got to take an input, you got to ask people opinions, you have to entertain ideas with full neutrality ideas that you disagree with. You have to be willing to become a method actor of process or method actor of systems. Take a lifestyle or a system or way of doing something or procedure or an idea, and go experiment with it become the idea for a temporary amount of time.
Try it on, see if it works. If it doesn’t, you moved on at least you gave it a chance, right? So you got to give ideas a chance you got to test it out. You got to be an experimenter. It’s like being a scientist of ideas to a point, right? So you can further develop your critical thinking.
Also, like there’s an excellent resource if you really want to, like, you know, Fast Track ti parent development. I highly recommend reading the book Socratic by Ward Farnsworth. It’s got an excellent analysis and exegesis of Socrates Socrates who was an intp, he has ti parent. And it talks about the Socratic method, learn the Socratic method and make use of the Socratic method to benefit you and people in your life.
It is absolutely critical that you do this. So, so yeah, you know, it’s not just good enough because like, you know, ti critic will just automatically dismiss things without actually giving it proper consideration. You have to learn how to develop a TI critic properly. And that is, yeah, you can dismiss them but if you don’t have any evidence or input or information to back up why you dismiss and you can’t explain why and you can’t explain yourself.
That means your TI parent is really underdeveloped anyway. So Do you have to be willing to experiment you have to be willing to consider those ideas, especially, you know, you want to be listened to right? Well, what good are you if you’re not able, what good is your TI parents are not willing to listen to other people with their te critic. Don’t just auto dismiss people. One of the main reasons why a lot of my relationships have been absolutely terrible in my life is because I didn’t listen.
And this can actually lead to even worse behaviors. I imagine a TI parent offering unsolicited advice to other people with their extra feeling child, it just causes their child to have its teeth kicked in. And ultimately, they’re just alienating people. And then their ti parent still stays underdeveloped.
They have to develop the habit, or the skill of critical thinking Socratic method is a very quick way to develop critical thinking, it’s probably the best form of critical thinking on the earth, in my opinion. That’s just an example. Right? So please, please consider that please, please understand that that’s, you know, the benefit there. And that’s ultimately what that means, right? So, anyway, folks, that’s how you develop ti parent, at least according to me and my point of view, so, thanks for watching, and I’ll see you guys in the next episode.