8 Rules for Loving and ENTP | Season 27 | CS Joseph
CS Joseph discusses 8 rules for loving and ENTP.
Welcome to the CS Joseph podcast. I’m your host, CS Joseph should be obvious a little, and welcome to season 26 Episode Seven, Eight rules for loving en TPS, my type. Yeah, so this particular episode may take a while, because sometimes the ENTP related content just as kind of longer than usual. For some reason INFP is also pretty freakin long.
But usually, when I’m talking about myself, it could just go a long, long, long way. But real quick, though, when it comes to the rules for love, just understand that the rules, and I haven’t really talked about this much than the season, but the rules have a tendency of changing, changing over time. And that’s because of a shift in relationships that a lot of people just are not aware of the shift. And it comes from, I became aware of the shift after reading Frederick Nietzsche, and his take on needs versus wants.
And this is extremely important. Because if you’re just starting to date somebody and you’re like doing the honeymoon phase, infatuation phase, or wherever the hell these people call it, these days, that very beginning phase of a relationship, like having sex for the first time dating, getting to know each other, all those things, that huge rush, etcetera, that is the wants phase, that’s where people’s wants are, like the higher. So when it comes to like eight rules for love, you know, in that phase, you’re gonna want to be more aware of wants, when it comes to a rules for love in a long term relationship, a committed relationship phase, which is basically post commitment. And then all of a sudden, the relationship over time starts to actually shed once as the primary goal, and it ends up prioritizing needs as a primary goal.
And this is really, really important because when needs become the primary goal within a long term relationship, the relationship ends up being at risk of failure. And this risk of failure really just is as a result of closeness and yawn, I’m quoting mating in captivity by Esther Perel, when I say that closeness is what ends up threatening a relationship in the long run. And you have to come up with ways in a long term relationship to reintroduce sexual tension, because sexual tension is actually the glue of sexuality within the context of a sexual relationship. Now, if you’re in a long term relationship, without sexuality, then I suggest you end that relationship, or get some side action, quite honestly.
Although if you’re like a woman in that, you’re probably going to have to end the relationship before you go in that direction. If you’re a man, well, I mean, men just I mean, they they get side action, regardless of the status, their relationships, it’s just kind of how men work. It’s their polygynous sexual strategy, and it’s just kind of normal. So you know, women following a one at a time approach, focusing on quality would be their sexual strategy.
Men, focusing on quantity of women, that is their sexual strategy, just to kind of define it for you, folks, you just kind of know how it works. In terms of morals and ethics surrounding sexual strategy, I don’t care to discuss those because they’re entirely subjective, and change from culture to culture. So take it up with your own culture. I’m not here to judge your culture, I’m not here to say mine is better, or even actually know what mine really is.
Because I don’t, I don’t and I just, I just, I just don’t care. So anyway, when it comes to the rules for love, it’s important to understand these dynamics, but the rules that I have are going to be kind of generalized generalized between needs versus want, it’s not really going to get into specifics. So just like this is like in general, you know, ENTPs are looking for this when it comes to having a sexual or romantic relationship with ni and TP. And that’s, that’s, that’s kind of a thing.
Now, just be aware. There’s lots of different kinds of en TPS out there and due to cognitive focus, and also different maturity levels as well based on how much life experience they have, I think out of all of the 16 types, the EMTP is definitely Only the weakest against. Actually they’re just the weakest of 16 times they’re the weakest just by default. However, they have the capacity to become the absolute strongest by developing their subconscious.
And that’s where you get people like Andrew Tay or David Goggins, etc who started out insanely weak within their life and then it became insanely strong and it’s just because of that opposites with that extremes dynamic etc when it comes to developing Introverted Sensing, inferior or infant because it’s a very infantile function. So just kind of be aware of that. I mean, I’ve I’ve been struggling with weakness my whole life, and it just comes with every child si inferior lacking life experience. My main hypocrisy of presumptuousness which we’ve discussed in the hypocrisy of en TPS lecture, in the private member’s area, if you want to become a member of CS joseph.ly forward slash members, become a journeyman member.
Also, if you want to be able to ask a question per month and have it to be turned into a YouTube video, that’s the Acolytes, so upgrade your journeyman to acolyte, you can do that at CS joseph.ly forward slash portal, where you actually login to your membership area and actually check that out. So for to get access to the private content. So and there’s like years of private content in there, guys. It’s like frickin Netflix, you could just binge, it’s just constant.
So, but yeah, like en TPS, just just be aware, like, there’s a lot of different flavors. And obviously, be aware of that for any of the 16 types. And you have to take these eight rules for love with a little bit grain of salt, because I may be unaware of my own bias in terms of how I’m presenting the eight rules based on the types. But really, the eight rules comes down to the needs or the wants, depending like I’m trying to generalize here of the cognitive functions.
And that’s just generally you know, how we’re doing it. So. But yeah, so EMTP, eight rules. Rule number one, you have to always make your NTP feel wanted and desired at all times, literally at all times.
And it’s funny, actually, I read an article years ago, and I wish it was still up, but it is not up anymore. It’s one of the best e NTP articles I ever read on the internet. It’s stuck with me for a long time. But in the article, this woman talked about and she was she was an INTJ woman.
I previously said that she was an INFJ. But no, she’s actually an INTJ. And she wrote about her NTP, boyfriends, plural that she had, and how she described and how she explained them, I realized that she was actually pretty accurate with her typing of her boyfriends that she had. But she said one of the main lessons that she learned is never ever, ever leave your E intp.
Alone, like ever. Because making your NTP feel unwanted is the fastest way via cognitive access to make their si inferior or infant just freak out, and then just be like, okay, hey, I’m not going to be loyal to you anymore. So, and it’s interesting because like, you know, throughout my life, you know, I tell women that I’m romantically interested in I tell them like, hey, look, if I find or if I get the idea, and I’m upfront with them, like right at the beginning, I tell them, like, Look, if you’re not really that interested in me, then you’re not getting any of my attention. It’s that simple.
And this is what the INTJ was trying to state, it’s like, hey, you need to make your E intp. feel wanted and desired. And don’t, don’t leave them alone. Because, you know, it’s funny because as much as, as much as you know, like, we claim that en teepees are low maintenance type, they’re actually an extremely high maintenance type, especially, the more mature and the more manly an ESTP is, the more towards their Alpha traits instead of their Beta traits.
And the intp is, the more maintenance they actually require. It’s funny that the more immature an ESTP is, the less maintenance they require. Because the immature en teepees just gonna go out there and spend their attention on anyone, anyone that shows them desire or want, they’ll just drop their pants for that person, it’s ESTP, male or female doesn’t matter. That’s what they’re going to do.
But the more mature they are, the more that they have a higher expectation of quality and actual meaningful desire desire that’s actually real realistic, authentic, basically. And if they’re not going to get that they’re not going to give you attention. It’s that simple. So the price of loyalty the price of an E and TPS loyal loyalty is unfettered, which means unchained 09:59 pure are passionate desire desire, you want them and you prove that you want them all the time.
So like, if you’re a woman, that means you’re going to have to initiate sex from time to time, you’re going to have to like jump his bones, basically, you see what I’m saying, you’re going to have to show that desire. And that’s not to say that any intp wouldn’t be dominant in the bedroom, because after your showing your desire, and they become more comfortable with you, over time, that dominant Christian gray side will start to come out. And this is because from a BDSM point of view, and I know that BDSM test has been tossed around the CSJ discord like constantly recently, in the BDSM test, en teepees are usually the switch. But the thing is, is that when I say the switch, so the switch is like they like to be dominant, or submissive, depending on the mood or depending on the situation, which is true, I am a switch from a BDSM point of view.
However, if my woman is not making me feel wanted and desired, in general, in life in general, I have no desire to be dominant with her, I have no desire to even give her attention, I will give attention to other girls, I will give attention to other women, and I won’t feel guilty about it. I used to feel guilty about it. I don’t feel guilty about it now. Because it’s like, right, my woman is not performing for me, she is not proving to me that she has desire or passion for me.
So I’m gonna go talk to other girls who do start simple. So literally, rule number one is make your NTP feel wanted make them feel desired all the time and prove it with concrete action, not just with what you say, you know, but with what you do, okay? You just have to, and now people are like, well, how the hell do I do that? Well jump your man’s bones every now and then or like, just just like, be like, get right up into your en TPB. Like, tell him like, yeah, I want you, you know, I want you because like, NTP is like, for example, if any NTP man is going to ask a woman, how’s he going to do it? Like, he really just goes right up to her super directed ti parent, and just be like, hey, you know, if you want to suck my dick in the parking lot after you get off work, you know, I’d probably be okay with that. Or you’d also be like, another way of saying it would be, hey, if you wanted to ask me out, I’d probably say yes, you know, same probably means a little bit of coke cat seduction style in there.
But he’s presenting the woman with a choice and immediate choice, as if like, because the intp man would be like, just immediately attracted to the person, even if they don’t exactly know the person per se, that’s just and that causes INTJ women to cringe and whatnot. But the thing is, is that INTJ women, if they actually allow themselves to be passionate with their ni hero, instead of being scared, you know, placees all the time, you know, they might actually discover something. That’s the thing. It’s so weird to watch and a hero just be so risk averse.
And when comparing INTJ to INFJ, women, I have to say that INFJ women are way more willing to take the risk of their ESTP subconscious than the INTJ is with their ESF P subconscious. And it’s hilarious to me. It’s so funny, because I get to watch an affiliative INFJ have more courage than the pragmatic, a triple pragmatic INTJ I laugh at that I think it’s hilarious. And I think that’s one of the reasons why INTJ women in general are just unhappy is because they’re not willing to take those risks.
They’re so afraid of losing what they have that the end, it’s like they’re holding sand, and they’re crushing their hands, and it’s slipping through their fingers and their entire life is slipping through their fingers because of it. And they’re not willing to take that risk. And I and they like to, and the thing is, is that you know, even INTJ is like they’re like they like I was talking to Andy recently. And she’s like, Oh, well, you know, emotional investment is important.
And I’m like, Whatever, whatever. Yeah, you INTJ say that emotional investment is important. Yes. And sure emotional investment is important.
But here’s, here’s the reality, okay, here’s the reality of the situation. That’s just, you know, whenever they claim whenever these women claim, they want this emotional investment thing, they’re either not actually that attracted to you, they’d probably don’t actually want you that much. Because you’re probably more beta than alpha or you’re not like you haven’t developed that balance of beta and alphas as as a man in that situation. But the real thing is, is that it’s just their se inferior.
They think by having that emotional bond, that it’s going to lower their chances of being rejected. That’s actually the situation when the reality of the situation is what is actually going to prevent them from being rejected is them having unchanged passion for their EMTP that’s the truth. emotional bonds, especially to a mature high value ESTP don’t matter as much anymore because he’s been around he has life experience. He knows hypergamy he is aware of the risks he has suffered, right? But then he you know, if you’re gonna reverse the situation, you have like, an INTJ man to an NTP woman, the INTJ man’s got that FYI, child masculine idealism, that’s like, super, super hand up.
And like, from his point of view, he doesn’t want to deal with a hypergamy NTP woman, and they are, they’re very hyper, just like, I can’t believe it, like, Oh, my God, like, they get around, they really get around. But the thing is, though, is at least the ESTP woman doesn’t have to suffer the burden of sexually performing. And like her, her, an ESTP woman is good at performing, if she just lies down on her back and opens up, because the INTJ man just doesn’t really care that much. And I know we’re talking about Golden pairs here.
But the same thing can be said even like the natural pair, which is the bronze pair, basically. So you know, the thing is, is that the intp woman doesn’t have to concern herself with performance. And she just has to go out of her way to make herself as desirable as possible and preserve her beauty over time. I mean, she has an easy when compared to EMTP men because antebi Women are still technically more feminine than they are masculine.
That’s not to say that their ti parent can’t come out and smack people in the face. And that can come off masculine sometimes. But at the at the end of the day, they’re still very feminine woman and thus very highly sought after by men. And then INTJ men think that this emotional bond is going to actually keep the intp more loyal to them.
And they don’t have to be afraid of her rejecting Him as often. I’m sorry, to tell you this INTJ is and also ISFP is even inf J’s I’m sorry to tell all this to people. But when it comes to en TPS, we have a fi trickster. So the emotional bond is not really coming from us.
Thus, it’s not our responsibility. It’s yours. It’s yours, which means you’re going to have to use your FII to actually invest in us all. Oh, but wait, that’s rule three.
Rule three is invest in your NTP. But let’s do rule two. Rule two is always listen to your ESCP. Even if you believe your NTP is wrong.
The good thing about ti parent is that it will self correct over time, and it will admit when it’s wrong, when it finally comes to the conclusion that it is wrong, it will admit it, and then it will feel guilty about being wrong. And then it will fix and that fix will be immediate. It’ll be immediate change. And it won’t happen again.
Because guess what en TPS overall are actually really consistent because they have si inferior going aspirational mode, which means they’re pretty consistent people. Okay, you don’t have to worry about that as much. Okay, so literally, it’s okay, tell the NTP how you feel. And make sure that they are aware of your feelings.
And what they are how are they are making you feel it’s that’s important. But the reality of the situation is you still have to listen to them. And it’s not good enough you FY users to just hear them because I know how FY users project on everybody else. Okay, because FY users just want to be heard.
They just want to vent but a TI user wants you to listen and what’s the difference between hearing and listening? Listening means you hear them but it’s hearing plus action, meaning you take action hearing plus action. Why is that important? Because one of the biggest needs needed TP has is trust. If an intp doesn’t feel trusted in relationship, they’re, they’re not gonna they’re gonna take their attention elsewhere. Trust is everything to an intp because they are already mistrusted by everybody else in their whole life that a third lover isn’t trusting of them.
Oh my god, you’re just like everybody else. Get away from me. I’m gonna go someone to someone else who trust me. I will drop you so fucking fast.
I’m like, like, seriously into the dumpster. You go. Like, no, 19:14 like, you don’t trust me. You can’t be in my life.
I and, you know, I’ve told this to many women in my life. Like, look, here’s the situation. If, if you’re treating me poorly, and another woman that I meet starts treat me better than you. My attention is going to her.
So you need to make sure you keep that up. And one of the ways that they can keep that up is through listening, listening, hearing plus action, even if they believe I’m wrong. This is part of a woman submitting to me and being submissive is that they trust me enough. They trust my thinking enough to actually try it out.
And then report back. And if I’m wrong, I’m wrong and I’ll take full responsibility for it but I won’t hold her responsibility responsible for the failure and this is where i nj women Get really screwed up, because they often automatically believe through cognitive projection that if I put them up to do something, and that they fail, they think naturally that I’m going to hold them responsible for their failure, when the reality situation is, myself, any intp and any intp out there worth their salt is going to hold themselves responsible for their failure. You see, that’s basically an example of how women actually can submit to an NTP man by proving trust. Okay, so ti parent, always listen to your NTP but really, actually, the rule is always trust your NTP trust their thinking, that’s really what the second rule is always trust your NTP.
Okay. And you prove that trust through listening and listening is hearing plus, action. Hearing plus, taking action hearing is not just good enough, and I know you FII users, sometimes you like to be heard. And that’s cool.
That doesn’t necessarily mean I gotta take action with hearing you, et cetera. But at least I heard you, you know, and I’m like, Yeah, I could see that, or, yeah, I hear you, or whatever. But the point is, is that at least you had your opportunity to vent you had your day in court doesn’t mean I’m going to take action, though. But you have fi users don’t necessarily need that.
Ti users, however, do need that listening equals hearing plus action, not just hearing, okay, it’s a huge, huge thing. Because ti users don’t really vent to people, they are all about problem solving. And unless you’re going to take action, hearing or venting is not good enough, basically. So understand that.
Rule number three is always invest in your EMTP, you as an FYI user, or you as any type, it doesn’t matter, you need to be willing to invest in them emotionally invest financially invest it as literally you are pouring in to your NNTP. Okay, you’re giving in to them. And naturally, they will return the favor by being super mega caring and supportive to you. But if you’re not willing to put up your investment upfront, at first, they’re not really going to be interested in also, they’re also not going to feel valued and made like they’re not going to feel like a priority to you.
Okay, and that’s the thing, you always want to make sure every child is the number one priority in your life. If you’re like a dog mom, for example, or a dog Dad, if that’s a thing. No, it’s probably not. But like, Look, if you’re a woman, and you have children, okay? Like you’re a single mom, or you’re a woman and you have animals, and you’re like single but you have animals, an intp man is gonna look at you and be like, Wow, she’s obviously gonna make her children a higher priority than me.
She’s obviously gonna make her animals a higher priority than me. She is not getting my attention. I’m going to go elsewhere. You see what I’m saying? So like, like, Do women not realize, especially NJ women, NJ women who are the ones who need an animal the most because, you know, they need something for their se because they’re alone.
But let me tell you something. And J women, or anyone out there, if you have an animal you are far less attractive to an ENFP than other women, like, hands up, man, I just just literally true, you know. Now granted, luckily, I like animals and I like dogs. But the thing is, is that I can’t stand it when a woman is putting their animal or their pet above me.
I will not be a second class or third class citizen in her life. And she has children I get that children are really really important. The thing is, is that if she has children and she wants me to like she wants me to like be like family to her one day she ever wants me to be family or or if she ever wants me to potentially take on a kind of parental role over her children. The reality of the situation is is that she’s has to put me first.
And it’s funny because my mother in law did put her new husband, my wife stepfather first, even to the point of actually kicking out my wife out of the house when she was young, on a few occasions because it was like she had to make the decision. Okay, I either like kick out my image or daughter or keep my husband because she was literally given that ultimatum. Right. And in that particular situation while it sounds really effed up, I think she made the right choice given the choices that she was given this iossef J She didn’t really her choice is completely taken away.
And you know, even my wife would admit, you know, yeah, I was pretty rough in those days and there were times where I absolutely did deserve it. So like Okay, fair enough. At least she her ti parent can actually admit that right? But the reality of the situation is you have to be aware that when it comes to those kinds of relationships, you know, if you if you have an animal like if you got a dating profile, you got your you got your dog there and whatnot like okay, yeah, you’re not going to get your like if any intp is super compatible to you and you’re like an ISFP an INTJ an INFJ an ISTP, for example. And, you know, or an EN TJ, and you’re, you’re a woman, and you have a dog on your profile.
You’re, you’re completely like a problem. Don’t put your animals on your dating profiles like seriously, that’s like a really bad idea. It’s a huge turnoff. Allow the intp to actually get to know you first, before you reveal that you have an animal.
That way their Fe child never feels like you’re gonna make the animal a higher priority than them. And the thing is, is that some women are so soft cystic that they don’t even know how, like how emasculating it is for them to put animals up on their dating profile. They’re completely unaware of how emasculating they are. And guess what, feminine women, feminine women don’t parade their animal around.
Okay? Because if you think about it, them having an animal is actually putting them in a masculine role with that animal, technically, and the animals kind of its emasculating, because the animal could take on, you know, the masculine archetype of her life, basically, especially if it’s like a male animal and whatnot, because she’s filling that void, et cetera. And then an actual man comes along in her life and has to compete with his masculinity with an animal that’s like this bullshit. It’s just not going to happen. Now granted, you know, INTJ men, you know, or, or, you know, INFJ men are like men in general going after E and TP women.
NCP women oftentimes actually naturally see animals just as an additional burden. So they’re not really very often it’s extremely rare for them to be dog moms anyway. However, it is extremely common for ESTP women to be single mothers, aka Alpha widows. That is very common and so that’s an issue so like, so all the all the compatible women with Auntie P man, they usually dog moms and single because they’re usually usually the compatible women with en TPS are the ones that, you know, swallow the feminist propaganda, big time, and there they like, and then they end up becoming sad and single and childless, especially in their late 30s.
And this is they have nothing less else else to give. So all they have is their career, basically, and they think their careers gonna be their legacy to which I respond. I have no choice but to laugh at you. Because while because when you die, no one’s gonna care, and no one’s gonna remember you seriously.
And you may think that you were going to make this huge mark on the world, with your businesses and whatnot. But actually, no, really, only a few people will do that. Like, like, how many people were remembered from the Revolutionary War era, the framers of the Constitution? You know, like, are we really going to remember Jeff Bezos? Are we really going to remember the previous Super mega rich men of you know, like, we might remember JP Morgan, or the Rothschilds, etc, or people that we refer to as old money. But no one cares about Michael Dukakis.
For example. Who is that? Right? No one cares about John May who is that? Right? So like, it’s, in order for someone to become great, especially like even a woman, you know, a woman entrepreneur, to be super great, and be able to depend on that legacy to provide fulfillment. It’s really not. Because here’s the situation, when you die, you’re going to be surrounded by who you’re gonna be surrounded by, are you gonna be surrounded by family and friends and people that actually give a shit about you? Are you going to be surrounded by kings, queens, dignitaries, princes, diplomats, aka VIPs, that really don’t actually care about you, 28:42 right? What’s more important? So I think all you people who are compatible, all you women who are compatible with NTP men, you might want to consider the consequences, please.
And also INTJ j’s are all of the compatible men with E and TP women, you got to understand you can’t take that away from en TP women, like you really need like, they are choosing to trust you, you need to choose to trust them, they’re being loyal to you please return their loyalty. Because any NTPs woman’s loyalty is extremely precious, is extremely precious. And if you have that, you need to make sure that you don’t screw with it. Do not screw with it in that way.
And recognize that she is the one who is giving you a legacy and being supportive of your legacy. Show her that respect. She’s taking a huge risk with you anyway. Okay.
Don’t let her down. Don’t let her loyalty down. Because imagine the kind of bitterness that she’s going to have as a person. If if you do let her down, because then she’s naturally going to project that on men in general and then become even worse.
And if you have children with her when that goes down. Oh my you’ve just destroyed your legacy there because her se demon will destroy Your legacy. That’s just how it works. Okay, so you got to be careful.
Watch out men, like, watch out. Don’t do that to EMTB women. Okay? Yes, women are high Pergamus. Yes, they’re self cystic, especially ESTP women.
But here’s the difference. They’re hardcore loyal, and they’re not stupid. And they’ll figure shit out. And they can be the strongest of all women out there, eventually, you just have to be willing to invest.
So invest, invest in your dNTP. Rule number four, do not make your NTP feel uncomfortable or unsafe. And you need to consistently make sure that you are keeping things clean, and nice and don’t pressure the NTP too much, they’ll start losing sleep, they’re easily pressured, they’re easily obligated. Also, please help the NTP not get obligated.
Sometimes we ended up other people obligate us or we ended up obligating ourselves. And it turns into an absolute shit show, because when we’re obligated, we’ll drag everybody else down with us. And it’s a huge problem. So please protect the SI infant inside of the en teepees mind from obligation go out of your way to use your extroverted sensing because if you’re in a sexual relationship with any NTP, you better have expert sensing, use your extroverted sensing to an obligate the NTP and remind them and teach them these things and pour yourself into them.
And this is an area that you can help them improve, help them improve by helping them manage obligations, and show them that the more obligations they take on, the more uncomfortable they’re going to be later. And the more complaining they’re going to be later. And the more they’re going to make everybody else in their life suffer because they themselves are suffering, but they put that suffering on themselves. So you have to be in suffering prevention mode, because the NTPs will absorb suffering.
And as suffering is attracted to en TPS like moths to a flame, you got to watch out for that. So you’re gonna have to help them manage that, okay, so they won’t go out of your way to give them a good experience. Look, if you’re gonna let your body go, and you’re an SE user, wow. And this is why I tell like, like, for example, I told men, you know, marriage isn’t worth it, because marriage don’t get anything out of men.
Because when a man gets married, his woman is frequency of sex goes down, quality of sex also goes down, and she’s just gonna let her body go. So she’s not so he’s not really getting anything, and you could argue is getting children. But then, you know, in Western society, a woman has the ability to decide if a man is fit enough to be the father of their child, and then just leave arbitrarily. So based on that a man technically actually gets nothing out of a marriage.
This is why I tell men to not get married. But yeah, they really don’t get anything marriage is like one of the worst decisions a man could, like ever make. And to the point where like, I like, if for some reason, like, you know, Railgun and I weren’t married anymore, I would never marry again, you know, like, it’s, it’s a really, really bad idea. And coming to these conclusions, I was already married before I came to these conclusions.
So you know, it is what it is. But like, you know, in a post, Chase, no longer being married era, I’ll never get married ever again. It’ll never happen. You know, it’s just, it’s just a really bad idea.
Man, don’t really get that much out of it. And all you dog moms or cat moms out there, who are you know, being delusional? Well, guess what, like, No Man’s going to marry you, especially, you know, if you’re like, if your fertility is expired, don’t forget, you know, hey, when you’re turned 30, you know, women’s fertility starts dropping 20% year after year. So you might want to pay attention to that, you know, all you NJ is out there who are so focused on your careers, you might want to start spending your fertile years on actually having children and then having your careers afterwards. But you know, that would require you to like don’t trust a man.
Oh, and what is the one of the number one needs an intp? Man hands? Oh, that’s right. Trust, oh, you need to be a woman has that same need, they need to be trusted. Because they’ve had to deal with their whole life of people not trusting them. Because they realize how shallow the world actually is.
NTPs hate how shallow the world is. And if you’re gonna be justice, shallow, and judge a book by its cover, which for example, INTJ is do that all the time man or women, constantly judging and TPS as books by their cover, and are insanely shallow. And because of that, you’re not getting our attention. You’re not getting our loyalty.
We’re walking away from that crap. So this is why INFJs are coming in and stealing your kill. Just letting you know. It’s your fault.
It’s your choice. So anyway, so yeah, make them safe, make them comfortable. Go out of your way to take care of yourself continue to be visually appealing forever. Like I have this thing where I’ve said, you know, hey, if you’re 50 years old, and you’re not looking sexy in a bikini, I will Divorce you or I will break up with you like that’s that’s just kind of how it is, you know, from my point of view, I have insanely high standards, you know, and if you are, if you can’t even be beautiful for me like all the time, then that means you’re not feminine.
That means you are not taking care of yourself, that means I’m not interested anymore. It’s just that simple. That means you’re being disrespectful to me. So make sure that you’re handling that.
Also, like, Don’t pressure me, I hate being pressured all the time. Let me when I am comfortable to do something, you’re going to have to just wait and be respectful of me, when I’m finally comfortable to do something, or have the energy to do something, I’m going to do it, then it may be a while, maybe a couple weeks, but you’re just going to have to wait. And if you’re not able to wait and wait on me, while you can’t, you’re not going to get my attention either you can’t be in my life. That’s just that’s just reality.
So the fifth rule is, is that just realize that NTPs have a huge problem with despair, we despair very easy. And based on that, like you want to go out of your way. So Rule five is don’t destroy an EN teepees hope or optimism. You want to support that optimism or their hope as much as possible.
And one of the best ways that you can do this is by sharing your hopes and your dreams with EMTP as well. Because then it seems less hopeless, it seems way more achievable, because they see somebody else doing it as well. And, and they will share that with them. Also, again, with Rule Four, make them feel safe and comfortable.
Recognize that they they’ll share things with you. Please accept what an intp shares with you, if you’re just going to not accept what they share with you, they’re not going to they’re going to stop sharing with you, and then they’re not going to want to share with you anymore. And again, their attention towards you goes down. So another aspect of oh four, but the oh five, that Despair is a problem that can be hopeless.
So to combat hopelessness, always tell them like what you want, what your hopes and dreams are. So they can have hope to because they are going to use their any hero to borrow your hope. So they could stop being worried about their own future, because that happens all the time. And it’s like super annoying that that happens.
But it is a thing. So make sure you’re on top of that rule. Rule six is just understand that they by default, kind of like treat everyone and naturally believe everyone is else’s stupid. The older they are, the less they do that the younger they are, the more they do it.
And while DNTPs often expect people to listen to them, they have a hard time listening to other people. So this is gonna have you’re probably gonna end up needing to be repetitive. But don’t nag your NTP that’s a problem. Don’t nag, and even even INTJ men neg I’ve seen it.
It’s kind of ridiculous. But don’t nag don’t nag the ESTP because that would violate rule four. But the thing is, though, is that just understand that if you’re going to be presenting information or evidence to the NTP, you better have done your homework because if they find one flaw in your argument, they’re naturally just going to dismiss the entire thing. So you better be on top of your research, you better actually know that what you’re talking about is true and accurate.
Because of TI parent, ti parent will nitpick it. And if it finds one flaw one, it they’ll just dismiss it. So just be aware of that. Make sure that you do your research.
You do your due diligence when it comes to en TPS. And if you do that, you’re good. And it’ll just make them even more loyal to you. And they they’ll they’ll like not even, they’ll reject you.
38:41 rule. Rule seven is stop having like insanely social expectations of en TPS. Like seriously, you can’t expect them to ever fit a social mold ever. And that’s why they wear a lot of masks because they switch from social norms and social norm like they change underwear all the time.
And while that is morally gray, and it’s very pragmatic, it is an aspect of their independence. You have to allow them to wear the mask, don’t pull them out of the shadows, let them be in the shadows, let them play their little mind games with little social games with other people just because they play those games with other people doesn’t mean they play those games with you. Oh my god, a little paranoid. INFJ is like seriously calm down.
But you know, because from their point of view, they’re sharing their masks, you get to be inside of their mask with them. Basically, that’s the EMTP way. Okay. So you don’t want to hurt that if I trickster can be a serious issue.
Now. If I trickster though, will develop morals over time, and they may they may be able to count them on one hand, but those morals aka principles, they will never let go of them because they’ve been completely tested. They’re like this is an actual principle and I will never let go of this and you will have to respect that principle. That’s when when they actually Have them it’s a really, really big deal.
But otherwise, just realize that they’re just going to be breaking the mold constantly and being that social pariah to the point of where it may even embarrassed you get over it. Get over it. Because here’s the thing, you have to realize that your embarrassment is based on subjective thinking anyway, so who cares? Who cares if you get embarrassed? Okay? If you get embarrassed, that’s, that could be as a result of your own ignorance. Not because the ENTPS and ass, it could actually be your ego investments being in the wrong place, if you ever considered that.
That’s why their te critic is not really going to listen to you unless you have, you’ve done your due diligence, which is rule six, right? So keep that in mind. And rule seven. Rule seven, just know that your NTP will naturally make everyone else uncomfortable around you all the time, they’ll come off like creepers, they’ll come off like axe murderers or serial killers or whatever, they will just consistently make people uncomfortable all the time, because that’s what se demon is, they’ll even potentially shame other people and make a show or make a drama just to prove a point or just to teach a lesson. That’s how ESFP super ego works.
Be okay with it. Also, you know, if you want to make sure that their se demon is not going to come out, again, make sure that you’re pampering and providing Zen to their si infant. Okay, super important. And then the demon is not going to come out and destroy everything.
Because here’s the thing. If an intp is uncomfortable, or hasn’t slept, or has insomnia or has a lot of problems, they’re going to make sure everyone else is suffering. So if an intp is suffering, everybody else will suffer. You want to stop the collective suffering in your life, in your family, in your workplace, get the NTP comfortable, and then the suffering will stop.
It’s that simple. Because the NTP is like, why is it fair that I’m the only person here suffering, if I have to suffer, y’all suffer with me, that’s the reality, okay, that’s the thing, you need to be aware of that. So make sure you’re going out of your way to heal that part of them. And this is a thing where like, you yourself, need to put in more effort.
So for se demon, make sure rule number eight, put in a lot of effort and do not cut corners or take shortcuts in your relationship. If you do, their suffering will increase and then your suffering and everybody else’s suffering. Even if you have children at the end, your children will suffer too. You can’t do that.
So no cutting corners, okay? Do not cut corners in your relationship. You are either all in or you are all out. It’s that simple. all in or all out, you have to do it that way.
And there is no other way. Otherwise, suffering will happen and your end people will take their attention elsewhere. That’s just that’s just how it is guys, I don’t know how else to be any less frank with you about it. That’s what will happen.
So anyway, folks, those are the eight rules for loving en TPS. If you found this lecture useful, helpful, educational, enlightening, please leave a like and a comment and we read all the comments etc. If you have any questions email support at CS Joseph dot life if you want to become a member of CS joseph.ly forward slash members. And then also guys don’t forget we have our new course that’s coming up very soon, it will start being available in February.
Firstly, it’s that’s what we’re timing it. And that course it will be how to bulletproof your relationships against failure and to be an amazing course, the visuals and everything that we’ve had on it is so good, including we’re going to have these data sheets for each of the types explain the cognitive functions, immature variants, mature variants, also definitions of the functions. We’ve done a really really great job they’re at the graphic artists right now and he’s building it for us. I’m just I’m just blown away by all the amazing content that we have for this course.
So you guys are definitely gonna want to get in on that. So we’ll make that available for you guys very soon. But one thing at a time, right so anyway folks, thanks for watching and I’ll see you guys tonight Can you believe you push a button