The INFP (also known as the dreamer), is the personality type with the cliché of a cute, awkward person, who likes anime. They are called “the dreamer” because they are constantly dreaming about an ideal future that aligns with their high sense of morality. Their strong vision of “the ideal”, gives them high expectations and they absolutely hate when their expectations are not met.
1. Unfair treatment.
INFPs belong to the idealist temperament. Idealists want a society where everyone treats each other fairly and with respect. INFPs sees a certain future, imagine how nice it would be, and get mad at anyone who gets in the way of the paradise they are trying to create on Earth. The society that they imagine, is a result of their affiliative mindset (they are focused on doing what is right for everyone). As a result, INFPs can often find themselves becoming “Social Justice Warriors”. They become SJWs because they look at people who oppose the creation of their ideal society, and it confirms that their extraverted feeling nemesis was right to worry about others’ lack of morals. Their introverted feeling hero must come in and save the day. Because they believe they are doing what is right, they can justify their own repugnant behavior. They can use their affiliative nature to create positive changes without becoming hostile nor aggressive. For example, an INFP who develops their ESTJ subconscious collects a large amount of reference points and uses those to help steer humanity in the right direction.
2. Dismissing their ideas.
INFPs can aspire to make themselves more intelligent with their extraverted thinking inferior. When they aspire with Te, they store massive amounts of information in their introverted sensing child, and this allows INFPs to master any topic. When you dismiss their ideas, INFPs feel like you are gas-lighting them into thinking that they are stupid, which makes their introverted sensing child very uncomfortable. This makes them despise the person who dismissed them, therefore, good luck trying to salvage that relationship.
3. Dismissing their advice.
It really upsets INFPs when people ignore their advice, they see it as, “oh you’re not smart enough to understand the complexity of my situation to give me advice.” INFPs absolutely despise this, as they are looking at your potential futures with extraverted intuition, and providing feedback based on the data points which have been accumulated by their introverted sensing child. They know exactly what is going to happen, and they hate seeing the futures they predicted come true and hurt the people they love.
4. Disrupting their order.
INFPs like to live in comfort, meaning that any series of events which throw their controlled comfortable place into disarray, will cause them great amounts of stress. An example of this would be when an INFP who is incredibly clean and organizes their room perfectly, lets their room fall into disarray and become messy. They will still know where everything is within the mess because they have their own order within that chaos. Even though it might be impossible for you to notice any added mess, they will be made uncomfortable by other people creating mess in their space.
5. Being forced into extraverted situations.
It can be chaotic when someone forces them into an extraverted social situation. They will be made uncomfortable by the chaos that is present and the lack of control they have over the circumstance. Immature INFPs also worry about what other people think of them with their extraverted thinking inferior, so the spotlight scares them. In fact, this makes INFPs appear to be more introverted than other introverted types.
6. People holding contempt for their feelings.
INFPs have a very strong desire to be a good person so they hold themselves accountable to their feelings. When you say their feelings are wrong, or regarding them as stupid, they interpret this as you effectively saying that you think they’re a bad person. This causes them to question themselves temporarily and resent you for making them feel gas-lighted.
7. Having their loyalty questioned.
Introverted sensing child makes INFPs incredibly loyal to the people who they love. Because this loyalty comes from the child function, it can be analogous to the loyalty and love of a child has for their mother. Imagine telling a child they don’t love their mother, that’s how you will make an INFP feel by telling them they’re not loyal to the people they love. The ironic part is, you can make INFPs become disloyal by questioning their loyalty. They start to think: “If I do the time, I might as well do the crime.”
If you liked this post, please share it to your social media of choice.
Are you an INFP and need some guidance on how to overcome your struggles? Or, do you know an INFP and want some more tips to deal with them?
Click here to subscribe to my Patreon to get your questions answered on my Q&A steams faster, or if your issue requires a private setting, greater understanding of you and your issue, or more time with Chase, then Click here to learn about private coaching sessions.