Season 12, Episode 8 Transcript
Chase: 00:03 Hey guys, it’s C.S. Joseph with CSJoseph.life doing another episode on social compatibility. Our current main focus… season, which is I believe season 12, because I do everything random around here so you never know what season it is; and funnily enough we’re going to complete season 8 and 12 roughly at the same time just to go into 10 and then 9 for some reason because I just like confusing everybody, but I mean, ENTP, so… Best way to get over ourselves, right? Anyway, social compatibility. Today’s episode is about ENTP. Social compatibility, about ENTPs. We also did an ENTP vid yesterday, and so for the sake of this lecture we’re going to be doing more on ENTPs. Which is fantastic because I get to talk about myself, right; or, I mean, at least I’m not talking about Sensors and it’s an Intuitive type because that’s what the majority of this audience prefers to hear about.
Chase: 01:04 At least currently until some of the more Sensors, like, decide that this exists and this might be something important, because everyone else, like the Intuitives, consider it important; but ‘Oh no,’ we have societal bias so we don’t really consider these things a priority for some reason. Yeah, that can be a problem. So anyway, with that in mind, let’s dive in, shall we? So for the sake of the podcast, as usual, I’m going to be audibly saying all the types in order which are social compatible with ENTP or the main type of the discussion; and as always I have to provide my disclaimer at the beginning, which is: social compatibility is not the same as camaraderie. What that means is people get annoying on this channel being like, “Well I’m an INTP, and I’m really good friends with an ENTP. Does that make me socially compatible with them?” No, it does not. It just means you have high camaraderie with them because you have… You are an NTP in the same way that they are an NTP, right?
Chase: 02:07 We actually talked about this yesterday in the lecture comparing ENTPs to INTPs, and the reason for that is: cognitive redundancy. This is nature’s way of building in redundancy in our minds so that we could still find common ground even with less compatible types, right? And as a result we have ‘camaraderie does not equal compatibility’; and remember compatibility is deep meaningful friendships because social compatibility is all about friendships. Not necessarily intimacy or working relationships, and intimacy is more of a face-to-face relationship. Working relationships [is] more shoulder to shoulder. We’re going to be doing plenty of seasons on all of those subject matters in the very near future. Be that as it may, the higher functional compatibility you have, which means your cognitive functions fit in with other people, and based on that, it’s like puzzle pieces coming together. [and…]
Chase: 03:03 Also for those of you that have noticed that I’ve been spelling conscious and unconscious wrong, my bad. I’ll fix that. I had a missing ‘s’ every now and then. So, luckily I recently graduated an overnight grammar school, and should not be making those mistakes further. But those of you that like to make themselves, you know, the grammar pilots, you know, flying grammar bombers on me that like to inform me of my grammar mistakes, please continue to do so because, I mean, it’s not like I have Se Demon and am committed to giving this audience the best possible experience ever, right? Anyway, with that being said, let’s look at what ENTPs are actually compatible with and that is: NJs. First and foremost: ENTPs are all about NJs and SPs. Sensing Perceivers. ENTPs love Sensing Percievers. Even if they hate them, they still love them. It’s kind of weird and Intuitive Percievers, and then SJs. One thing I would like to mention about this in general, regardless of relationship style, shoulder to shoulder, face-to-face, are averaging them together to create social compatibility.
Chase: 04:21 These four things: NJs, SPs, NPS, and SJs – it follows the same pattern for each. It Is the same pattern every time, right? It’s just how we extrapolate the order after which is based on the specific algorithm we use to calculate which cognitive functions are more compatible with the other based on the relationship style itself. We will be talking about relationship styles a little bit more after we’ve completed these compatibility seasons [on] of lectures, et cetera, and it’s going to be the next infographic I think. I hope, but yes. Well, I mean there will be an infographic for it, but whether or not, like, that’s the order at which I’m going to be releasing the next infographic… I’m not entirely sure, but don’t worry I’ll be producing more infographics. Especially as, you know, more money comes in because, you know, more money equals more content for you. Just so you know.
Chase: 05:18 But that being said, in order we have NTJs first, SFPs NFJs STPs, STJs, NFPs, SFJs, and NTPs. Yes, that is what ENTPs are all about, in that order; and here is, for those listening to us on the podcast, the order of the 16 types. So highest social compatibility to lowest social capacity, deepest friendship to least deepest friendship in more of a shallow acquaintancy, like, “Stay away from me, don’t touch me,” or from a distance, “Hi over there, but we’re not going to really interact very much and have that really deep meaningful relationship”, right? For example, you can tell that INTP is second lowest on that. Let me tell you a story. Steve Jobs – he’s an ENTP; Steve Wozniak – he’s an INTP. They had very low functional compatibility, very low social compatibility, right, because they’re both NTPs; but they had super high camaraderie because they’re NTPs, and together they’re able to build Apple.
Chase: 06:19 So just to show you guys, as an example, how important and how far camaraderie can take you inasmuch as social compatibility with your relationships can take you; and Steve Jobs would have done anything to protect Wasniak, and we all know that the feeling was mutual, right? Again, the camaraderie is super important, and to not be dismissed. We’ll probably be doing a lecture series specifically on camaraderie in the very near future. Probably about the same time that we’re going to be finishing out the whole types versus compared to which other type, et cetera. I’m doing those comparisons. I’m doing, like, the general comparisons. Like, four different seasons of those, and then additional user or subscriber requested comparisons I’m getting. Just so you know, like, I’m paying attention to, like, all those requests, and all of them are going to a giant ass spreadsheet where I’m going to be doing a lecture on all of them. So don’t worry, it’s coming. [I just] I can only produce so many lectures a week, you know what I mean? It’s a lot of work, so I guess I’ll just keep going. Obviously.
Chase: 07:26 So for the podcast listeners, audibly, from top to bottom: highest compatibility with ENTP is the INTJ; followed by ENTJ; number three is the ISFP; number four is the ESFP; number five is the INFJ; number six is the ENFJ; number seven is the ISTP; number eight is the ESTP; number nine is the ISTJ; number ten is the ESTJ; number eleven is the INFP; number twelve is the ENFP; number thirteen is the ISFJ; number fourteen is the ESFJ; number fifteen is the INTP; and sixteen is obviously themselves – who they identify with being that they are an ENTP themselves. Okay, sure. That makes a lot of sense. So we have our list of sixteen as per the social compatibility algorithm, and for the sake of brevity, because these lectures can get way too long discussing every possible combination of compatibility, social compatibility with all the types – I’m doing the top four most compatible, and the bottom four least compatible [for] according to social compatibility for this lecture.
Chase: 08:25 So, let’s begin. Starting with the INTJ: ENTP and INTJ. Extraverted Intuition Hero loves to consume the willpower of Ni Hero. Yes! I love willful people. Why is that? Because I get to be that guy that’s in a bar, you know, drinking my drink which is usually a rum and coke, or a really awesome Sangria. Let’s be honest, and I’m sitting there at the bar minding my own business, reading my phone, you know, or watching something on my phone. Maybe I’m working on something, or maybe I’m just there for the ambiance because I’m an extravert obviously; but I’m bored out of my mind not doing anything, and I just happen to be single at that point in time. Guess what? I love it when those INTJ or ENTJ women gets so willful, willful that they have all the courage in the world to, like, straight up ask me out right there in the bar, and it’s the women initiating with me, right? This is how it should be for NTPs.
Chase: 09:25 NTPs it’s always better if your female companions initiate with you in the beginning more so than you initiating with them. Why? Well, because NTPs have a bad rap of being called creepy if they’re the ones initiating. Why? Well, guess what? Extraverted Sensing Demon is not usually a good function to lead with, if you know what I mean. “Oh, I’m going to give you this demonic experience by initiating with you at the bar.” Yeah, that’s not going to go over well. {downward motion; crash and burn sound} Oh yeah, and by the way you’re labeled a creeper, and then thusly blacklisted from all that girl’s friends at that bar simultaneously. Then you’re totally screwed, man. Yeah. Don’t do that. Allow other people to want you. ENTPs love – LOVE – being desired. An ENTP being desired in the same way INTPs love being desired – It’s all about extraverted Intuition Hero and guess what? There is more desire available in an INTJ than with any of the other types – with the exception of the INFJ – but still it’s there, and the ENTP feels desired. I am desired by this INTJ. Fantastic.
Chase: 10:27 Let’s be friends because this person actually wants to be around me. They actually desire it. Awesome. So – I am aware, they are aware of what they want, and I’m aware of what they want. I want to give them what they want, so great. Let’s be friends. No conflict there. Next on the list we have what I think. I’m all about what I think. I care more about what I think than anyone else thinks. It’s great. It’s because I’m very logical. I focus on what’s true/false, and make decisions based on what is true/false first and foremost; and thank God the INTJ doesn’t compete with me in that area, and they’re just coming up to me and being like, “Well, hey. What do you think about this?”
Chase: 11:03 INTJs can rely on my thinking a lot for their own internal belief system, right? And oftentimes they like to use their Ti Critic to verify what my Ti Parent is saying, and they do research, and guess what? Te Parent can educate Ti Parent if Ti Parent is inaccurate in it’s logic, which can happen. It’s awesome because then I get to have the benefit of all the reference points and all of the data provided by the INTJ to show that I’m wrong, and then guess what? I’m going to accept that I’m wrong. I’m going to humble myself because Ti Parent is a responsible Thinking function because it’s a Parent, which means it’s the responsible Parent, right? And then all of a sudden: “oh wow, you’re showing me all these things. I’m wrong”, instead of being like “err” and all upset that I got proven wrong. I’m going to accept it, take responsibility for my inaccuracy, and I’m going to immediately change.
Chase: 11:55 That’s one thing about ENTPs people don’t realize. They change quickly. As soon as they realize something is not true, they throw it out and they immediately change. It’s within seconds in their life. It’s kind of how ENTPs can break up with somebody in an intimate relationship and have that person completely replaced the following day, if not the [following] if not that night, right? Because the ENTP’s like: “I’m not going to waste my time, and I don’t want to be alone either. So, clearly this relationship’s over. Okay.” “But why don’t you feel bad or have any regrets or why, you know, how could you just leave me so quickly? Obviously I wasn’t important enough to you.” Actually you were important enough to me, but because the relationship’s over why am I going to waste my time? It’s not about the feelings of it, it’s about the truth of the situation, and it’s true we’re not together anymore so I’m moving on. Ti Parent! That’s why. It doesn’t mean we’re dicks. It doesn’t mean we’re uncaring. It just means we are aware of the truth, and the truth is we’re not together anymore so we just decided to get another date.
Chase: 12:57 I mean, that happened to me once. I was dating someone, and then something bad happened. We weren’t in a relationship anymore and I was talking to somebody, literally, I had a date lined up the following day and it was fantastic and it worked out. Great. No issues there, right? Like, I’m not going to waste my time. Remember, I’m a movement type. Thank God the INTJ is a movement type too because we could move quickly together, and I’m not being slowed down by them, you know what I mean? Not that slowing down is a bad thing because sometimes an ENTP needs a control type around them to help reign them in a little bit because they act too quickly, and they’re trying to boil the ocean. It’s too big, and it helps them. It actually causes them to be irresponsible, right? So having that control type around allows them to actually slow down, and then be more responsible because they can create too much chaos, right? Because ENTPs are agents of chaos. They are agents of change, right?
Chase: 13:55 So Te is aware of what I think, and I’m aware of what I think. No conflict. INTJs are aware of how they feel – their moral compass. I love their moral compass. It is epic. It is dope. It is fantastic. Thank God they behave morally because then I don’t have to worry about whether or not the INTJ is a bad person. Even though they are accused of being a bad person by, like, everybody else in society on top of the fact that they’re accused of [being] of having Asperger’s as well. Yeah, but luckily Fi Child exists which makes me feel better because it’s like, “Oh, thank God. I can make this person feel good. I can make them value themselves more; and they’re doing everything out of the kindness of their heart, and they’re being really sincere about it. Wow. Now I can take my insincerity mask off, and actually be a true human being to this INTJ. Thank God you exist.” You know what I mean? So they are aware of how they feel ,and I’m aware of how they feel; and I have my Si Inferior insecurity. I am afraid of doing new things all the time, and I am afraid of being uncomfortable. I need to be comfortable.
Chase: 14:54 Do you think I ever allow anyone to order my own food for me at a restaurant? Hell no. I will tackle them, and make sure that I am the one putting in the order, and it is my exact specifications – and guess what? INTJs, with their Te Parent and Se Inferior, will know that it is a good thing with their Fi Child. That they would want to give me the ultimate experience by memorizing my order for me, and understanding that process because they know I care about it that much; or at least give me the option of being comfortable enough by ordering it myself. That’s just one example in that restaurant date-like environment with the INTJ, and the INTJ would be aware of that. Thank God, because I hate it when my order is wrong. I want to go Se Demon mode and burn the house down, and INTJs are aware of that because they want to give me a good experience, and thank God for that.
Chase: 15:44 INTJ Se Inferior is great because they don’t have to be insecure around me. They do not have to be insecure around ENTPs anymore because they’re so afraid of giving a bad experience, and I’m so afraid of having a bad experience, that it’s like, “Okay. Well that cancels out,” and then we can aspire. Great. Since you already are so awesome at giving me a good experience because you’re so committed to making me comfortable and you’re already making me comfortable, INTJ person, have at it. You have full license – a blank check to do whatever you want. You have full freedom and all the experiences you could deliver me because I trust you, because I appreciate the experience you’re trying to give me and that’s where our compatibility comes from. It is the dopest, right; and they could do that, and they constantly deliver that, you know. Especially in the bedroom. INTJs don’t have to worry about it being a process because Si Inferior can get very regular in the bedroom, and Si Inferior does not mind receiving the same experience, or close to the same experience.
Chase: 16:40 Even in the bedroom, over and over and over again which allows the INTJ all the room in the world to improve their bedroom technique for example, right? And because it’s like, “Okay, I’m going to do 90 percent of what I did last time, but I’m gonna make this one little teeny [change].” You can see what happens, right; and this allows the INTJ to be very process oriented in the bedroom like they already are; and allows them to experiment and try new things; and that can also lead to the most amazing experiences down the road, right? Practice makes perfect. The ENTP is the ideal canvas for which the INTJ can paint upon in order to create the ultimate masterpiece. Especially in the bedroom, yes, and that’s because of Se and Si. It is, again the dopest, right? I mean that’s, like, a meme. I mean, if someone could, like, make a cool gif of ‘it is the dopest,’ and, like, post it on the comment section of this lecture that’d be the dopest. Anyway.
Chase: 17:35 So, uh, I worry about my future. I’m always worried about my future, all the time. I worry about whether or not I’m going to be a good father. I worry about whether or not I’m going to keep my job even though I know I am, but I’m still worried about it anyway because I’m an ENTP and it sucks. I just had this latent anxiety about my own future and I can’t get away with it. I can’t get away from it. It’s because it’s Ni Nemesis. I’m constantly worried about my future. I’m constantly worried that I’m going to get cancer and die early. I’m constantly worried that bad things are going to happen to me down the road, even though there’s no evidence to suggest that that’s what’s going to happen.
Chase: 18:05 And guess what? The INTJ who cares about me, who is my friend, who was in a deep friendship with me cares about my future because they’re worried about my future as well. So they invest a lot of time trying to make sure that I’m okay, and they provide references, and data, and information. Especially when it comes to, like, my health for example, I have one INTJ that does that for me on a regular basis, right? Also, I have an INTP that does that for me on a regular basis, and having an INTP and an INTJ working together, providing all that information to me, to make sure that I have that longevity. It is absolutely amazing because the puzzle pieces just fit together because I have maximum camaraderie, and have maximum compatibility all in the same conversation. All available to me, and we literally create this insane synergy that will protect my future, right? All because of their Ne Nemesis because they’re also worried about my future, and they actually care enough about me in that regard, and I love that about them, right?
Chase: 19:01 Also the INTJ is very critical towards their own intelligence, and I’m very Critical towards everyone’s intelligence, and yeah I see the INTJ going out of their way to verify, over and over and over what they know so that they can believe in what they know because they have to believe (Te Parent) in what they know (Ti Critic); and they verify it, and I love that about them. I love that they verify – and every now and then I catch them on not verifying with Ti Parent and Te Critic, but they always course correct in the same with I course correct for them, right? And that allows me to be loyal to them.
Chase: 19:33 And the ENTP is again, Si Inferior, the ENTP is not going to be loyal to just anyone, right? Make sure you have an agreement of loyalty and you have the terms of your relationship understood early, and that’s not wrong for an INTJ to ask for terms, it’s not wrong for an ENTP to ask for terms because they have an INTJ shadow. The point is, understand the boundaries of your relationship as soon as possible. That way there are no covert contracts because covert contracts are immature, dumb, stupid, and super manipulative. And this relationship is notorious for covert contracts.
Chase: 20:05 Be careful. Okay? So then we have Fi Trickster, which is me, I lacked morals entirely, so I actually rely on the INTJ to be my moral compass for me, and I’m constantly going to them, “Hey, how do you feel about this?”, and I love being able to have that moral compass, right? And they’re completely unaware of how I feel which means they don’t really know how to behave socially around me. Well that’s fine because I don’t care. I’m the social person. They’re not, and I’m glad that they’re not because then that means I can be in my little social arena, you know, and then the INTJ is just happy to be there. Great.
Chase: 20:41 Oh, and by the way, in that social situation their Se Inferior is also really awesome because they help me dress and not look like a moron because let’s be fair. I really don’t have that great of a fashion sense, and, I mean, I wear the same thing all the time as you guys have basically been able to tell in watching this channel. Thank God INTJs exists because they’re like, “Hey. You need a wardrobe upgrade, and here’s the list of everything you need, and here’s the occasion to use it for,” and they give me, like, this spreadsheet of links and everything; and it’s like, “Oh thank God someone like you exists; and thank God someone like you could just start busting out dance moves on the dance floor, and then educating me onto dancing this”, you know what I mean? Thank God for INTJs.
Chase: 21:26 And then we have Se Demon to Si Demon. INTJs really don’t give a damn about what they are experiencing. They care about what other people are experiencing, and I don’t really give a damn about what they’re experiencing either because of Se Demon. I’m so focused on my own personal experience I don’t have time to be focused on anyone else’s experience with anything. Even though at times I emulate it for the sake of, you know, my “insincere masks” that I wear with each human being I come into contact with, right, because people can’t really handle the Ti Parent truth because it’s so alienating. Luckily [to] INTJs it’s not alienating, and they would rather me be insincere and the most sincere human being they’ve ever met. That’s what they want, and I can be in my virtue around them instead of stuck in my vice. Awesome. I love INTJs and that is how we’re compatible.
Chase: 22:10 ENTJs, it’s basically the same except the difference is they are a control type, not a movement. They’re extraverted like I am so we get to go extravert together which is also pretty cool. There’s no limitations, but then again having an INTJ introvert is also nice when we go out to social things because the INTJ’s like, “Ugh,” and I can be like, “Oh, you’re not feeling good are you?”
INTJ: 22:28 “No.”
Chase: 22:28 “Okay, can we go because I’d also like to dip out too,” you know what I mean, because what ENTP doesn’t want to have a contingency plan for dipping out? And the INTJs like my contingency plan all the time, and they’re like “Whoa, I’m an introvert. I don’t have any more energy. I’m tired. Can we go home now?” I’m like, “Yes, please. God Almighty. Let’s go home. Awesome. I get to leave now and be away from, like, all these people that I don’t actually like.” {sigh} I can take my mask off now and we can just be in the car going home,” and it’s like ‘thank God,’ you know?
Chase: 22:59 The ENTJ is a little different. They’re very extraverted so they can actually go out and socialize with the ENTP which is nice, and they know what they want in the same way that the INTJ does. They’re aware of what I think in the same way the INTJ does. They’re committed to giving me a good experience in the same way the INTJ is, except more s., about twice as much actually because Se Child has twice as much sensory power than the Se Inferio. To the point where it can be overwhelming, but I can say that Se Child is amazing for Si Inferior because [the] just the amount of sensory, and the amount of experiences they give Si Inferior. It can actually cause Si Inferior to grow and actually become even more aspirational over time. It is a very awesome relationship, and ENTJs are afraid of how they feel and you know what?
Chase: 23:47 I just want to make them feel good. I never want the ENTJ to ever feel like they’re a bad person when they’re around me – ever one time. Never, and I do not appreciate it when people shit on ENTJs and make them feel bad because they are great people. You just have to deal with it. You have to accept that fact that they are great people. They’re just insecure and afraid that they’re a bad person, but that insecurity becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy which leads them into their avarice when in reality they should be altruistic. That is an issue, and an excellent argument for Randian Objectivism if you actually think about it. Not that I would tell you to buy into Ayn Rand, but [many] I mean. Let’s be honest, ‘Atlas Shrugged’ was written about Dagny Taggart who is an ENTJ, and John Galt who is an ENTP.
Chase: 24:38 “Oh, so that book and those movies [is] actually about this relationship?” Yes, it is, so if you want to find out more read that book or watch that movie; and obviously they’re committed to making me… They’re committed to making me comfortable. They’re aware of what I think. They give me all the reference points in the data., All of this cognition is available within our ego and our shadow. The functions are able to find easily what they need readily and there is built in humility within the Parent-Hero relationship here. Which is really nice because the ENTJ is not as impulsive as the INTJ, and because our functions are directly stacked across there is the ability to have conflict here: the competition. This is an insanely explosive relationship in all of the positive and negative ways that you can imagine, and INTJs can jump to conclusions about ENTP intentions, and they’re like:
INTJ: 25:31 “Oh, you know, you’re doing this, and you have this pattern growing [and] you’re doing…”
Chase: 25:35 But ENTJs can do it as well with their Ne Critic, and, you know, Ne Nemesis for the INTJ, Ne Critic for the ENTJ. It’s just ENTJs – you can talk them out of jumping to conclusions faster than you can INTJs, but once you do talk the INTJ out of… and, you know, show them, and prove to them… Prove you’re loyal to them, because INTJs need loyalty more than ENTJs, right but ENTJs still need loyalty and they appreciate it, but ENTJs even more want to feel good about the fact that you’re loyal to them, right? You just have to continue to prove that to them in the same way that you would an INTJ. It’s very similar, right? ENTJs worry that they’re stupid, and I never want them to think that they’re stupid ever one time. They’re critical towards my own future, and they’re telling me, “Wow, you’re being dumb. You’re not actually dying,” because every ENTP out there, because like Howard Hughes always thought he was dying. He was an ENTP. You ever watched the movie ‘The Aviator’ with Leonardo Dicaprio? Oh, wait, another ENTP movie you should watch if you’re an ENTP.
Chase: 26:32 Yeah, that’s because Ni Nemesis sucks. Si Inferior sucks. These two get going together, and then we end up thinking, like, we’re dying at all times even though that’s not actually true. I’ll admit it, you know; and they’re already worried that they’re not intelligent, and they do go out of their way to verify, and I criticize them for that, and it helps them stay on track; and then the ENTJ appreciates how I can handle people for them, and they appreciate how I can help them think, and be more organized, and more effective. Both these two relationships: ENTP plus INTJ or ENTP plus ENTJ – it’s all about creating synergy, and making them, and increasing their efficacy. They become more efficient. They become more effective. They become more capable. It is a “better together” message as with any of these relationships in the top two is a “better together” message; and that could also be said about the ENTP plus ISFP [where the Parent]… where the Child teams up with the Hero which is really great, and the Parent can parent the Inferior function.
Chase: 27:35 This allows for teaching. I can teach ISFPs to become more intelligent, more capable. Although I will say that Te Inferior can be a little bit difficult for me to handle because Te Inferior just really, really needs a lot of time to develop the technical skills like mastering a spreadsheet, and being able to handle finances and whatnot, instead of just doing whatever they want; but I like how willful ISFPs are so it can work out pretty well as long they at least allow me as long as they try to be responsible with choosing things with the options I give them. But then again ISFPs really, really need me to be ethical and focus on making them feel good; and sometimes, you know, sometimes my Child may not be enough for them at times, but it is still worth it in that regard because they’re still committed to giving me a good experience, and they can always come to me and ask me what I think and I’m able to help them think so it ends up being great. Not only that, ISFPs have amazing art, and ENTPs of all the types are the greatest appreciators of art. That and ENFPs, to be honest.
Chase: 28:42 Si Inferior is a huge appreciator of art and all things in Se land. Anything that Se has to offer – Si Inferior wants to experience, or at least have the opportunity to experience it at least once. You know, the Si Hero demands it all the time. The Si Inferior, however, when it’s aspiring wants to at least experience things once. It’s very important to the Si Inferior, and it will be comfortable to do so. So people who are afraid and have that performance anxiety about giving an ENTP an experience, they don’t have to be afraid anymore. Then we have the ENTP plus the ESFP which was my marriage until recently, because I’m divorced, and I was married to an ESFP, and… helping her with her Ni Inferior. She just never knew what she wanted, and that was difficult, but we somehow made it work for 11 years; and she’s always trying to give me an experience, and I was always trying to make her feel good, and she was always trying to show me different thoughts and whatnot.
Chase: 29:41 It’s kind of interesting. Even though all of our functions are able to get what we get, you know, within the top, within our ego versus our shadow, or unconscious side of our mind. It’s funny, like, after being divorced to this ESFP woman… we have two children with each other. Our relationship is, like, the best it’s ever been, you know. It’s not… An ESFP-ENTP relationship – while you can do marriage, and it just takes a lot more maturity, and there is some latent compatibility there, and it can work. It’s more of a friendship social compatibility thing instead of, like, a face-to-face compatibility thing. Why? Well, for example, in my own experience, we’re really good friends, and actually our relationship has been the best ever since the divorce, actually; and it’s kind of interesting how that works because this is friendship-based compatibility, and you can really reach them at the friendship thing level.
Chase: 30:35 The ESFPs are off, like, ‘oh yeah.’ Getting all the attention at the party, or the social gathering, you’re getting… because they’re all about the attention. Then I can go in my ISFJ because, like… If I show it to a social event, a lot of people don’t know this about ENTPs, but I go into my ISFJ mode when I’m uncomfortable. I’m just super behind-the-scenes to standoffish. Maybe even aloof to people which can be off-putting and alienating. It’s just, like, I don’t even know who to engage with. I don’t even know where to start, right? I have no energy, right? So it takes, like, [an NTJ] or an NTJ of some kind, even an SFP, or somebody who realizes that I’m being uncomfortable. An Se user, and the Se user comes over to me – and maybe even an ENFJ – and makes me more comfortable, and then I’m able to break out of my ISFJ shell, and I’m in my ego, and I’m able to go and integrate with everyone else.
Chase: 31:23 Or I drink caffeine, or alcohol, and then I end up in my shadow, and then I’m just really good at pool all of a sudden even though I’m terrible at pool; but when I’m, you know, drunk then I’m really good at pool for some reason. That’s because I’m in my INTJ shadow. It’s an Se user versus, like, the Si user that is my ego, but we’ll do more lectures on how substances change with the cognitive transitions at a future date. So yeah, this completes the compatibility of the top four functions. Very similar interactions between NTJs and very similar with SFPs. Just realize that with the Hero hitting the Inferior function, it can create bitterness. It can create some problems, and familiarity can create contempt especially in the fourth relationship. I have noticed ENTP and ISFP marriages to actually be very common.
Chase: 32:12 For some reason, for social compatibility in First World culture the number three relationship is the most common marriage, for some reason, with the exception of INTPs and ESFPs. That’s not as common, but it is super common for most of the other types, and I have seen ENTPs being married to ESFPs in the same way that I was, often. [It is} it is also decently common. These don’t really occur as much because they just can’t really find each other because it’s like finding a needle in the haystack. ENTJ women and INTJ women are the rarest of all the types. NTJ women are super rare. NTJ women are even rarer than NFJs. Good luck finding them. Which, by the way, if you’re watching this and you’re an ENTP, or an NTP, try and find yourself an NTJ woman; or maybe you’re an NTJ trying to find yourself an NTP woman, or whichever gender – it doesn’t matter.
Chase: 33:09 Let me tell you how to find ‘N’s to be in relationships with. If you’re an N type and you want to be in a relationship with another N type, here’s what you do. Get a smartphone, download a meetup app, and then go to a politics and philosophy group, and a discussion group, and go discuss. Maybe they do hiking, maybe they go to the coffee shop. It doesn’t matter. Just go discuss, and guess what? There’s Ns everywhere, and then eventually get the talking, and someone will be attracted to you; and then all of a sudden you’re dating, and then all of a sudden – you obviously get where I’m going with this, right? The point is go to where these people are, and they all congregate around similar things. “But there is no politics and philosophy group nearby.” Well guess what? Start one and stop being afraid. Remember, fear is the mind killer. Like, get out of your fear, otherwise you’re never going to be happy and reach self-actualization. Wow. Don’t be that person.
Chase: 33:56 So anyway, that is compatibility. Let’s talk about not so compatible with the more interesting types. So we have ENTP plus ISFJ. You know, my mother; and the ISFJ is all about justice, right – and justice is the most important thing – and of course I’m not going to give Si Hero a good experience because I have Si Demon. Of course I’m not going to behave morally enough for the ISFJ because they have Fe parent and I have Fi Trickster. It’s like the black hole. It sucks away my humanity, and they’re trying so hard to give their ENTP friend, or a family member, you know, a sense of morals, and it’ll just never happen. Guys, I’m not going to behave morally. Get over it. And… [you know], and then I’m Criticizing their inner Child which is, like, Child abuse, you know. Saying you’re stupid. Me telling the ISFJ that they’re stupid. That’s literally Child abuse. Don’t do it, you know.
Chase: 34:46 Or them telling my Child that, you know, I’m immoral, or I’m uncaring. This happens to me all the time by ISFJs. They’re telling me all the time that I’m the most uncaring human being that they’ve ever met, or I’m too harsh, right? All the time, it’s Child abuse and they do that, you know; and they’re very worried about the experience I’m having, and they really don’t care… Yeah. They’re very worried about the experience that I’m having, and they don’t care. They will order my sandwich for me, and they don’t care if they get it wrong. They’ll just tell me to get over it because their introverted sensing is perfectly capable of handling mayonnaise and other horrible things that I hate on sandwiches. Whereas my Si inferior is not capable of mentally handling it, and I’d rather have something plain, and then add things slowly over time as I develop my tastes, instead of having everything thrown at me because I don’t have Si Hero because ISFJs are judging me by their own type.
Chase: 35:38 And I’m so sick of it. Stop judging people by your type because people, when they judge someone by their type, they’re judging them by their ego, or they’re judging them by the subconscious that they’re trying to be, or they’re judging them by those people that they have highest compatibility. Those three areas are how people primarily judge people. Stop it. Instead how about you be useful, and then type other people, and judge them according to their standard {HA} because, like, you actually care about understanding them? That be nice, you know. Understanding others. “No. No we can’t do that because we’re traditionalists. We’ve never heard of that before; and because we’ve never heard that before, you know, we haven’t heard about type, or this form of Jungian analytical psychology. We don’t have to care because we’ve never heard it before.” So head in sand. Really? No. No. SFJs end up getting closed minded in that way and that’s why NTPs really have a hard time interfacing with them.
Chase: 36:37 It’s really bad because the ENTP is trying to be the most open minded, but they’re so traditionalist, they’re so past-focused. They’re so duty-based that they’re willing to listen to the pulpit, you know, at church, and have their lives dictated to them without free thinking it themselves, and because it takes a long time for the ISFJ to develop their ENTP subconscious – and then they start free thinking, but that’s later in life. Conversely, the ENTP has a hard time developing their ISFJ subconscious. This is why an ENTP, younger, is more like a pussy and has no capability of being anywhere in the outdoors. Whereas an ENTP who is older and in midlife – they’re all about the outdoors. They’re all about having their knife collection they’re all about survival skills. They’re all about going hunting. They’re all about going hiking. They’re all about backpacking, right?
Chase: 37:25 It’s kind of interesting how SJs talk about how they did everything fun in their yout,h and then as they get older it’s like they’re living their life backwards. I’ve heard that from plenty ESTJs and ISTJs, right? Because they have all the fun in the beginning, and then they just become these philosophers because they’re turning into NPs, right? Whereas the other way around; NPs start out and they become SJ-like with their subconscious because that’s who they’re trying to aspire to be, right; and that’s why there’s conflict because the ISFJ’s looking at the ENTP and being like, “Well, I’m a better ENTP than you are,” or the ENTP is looking at the ISFJ saying: lwell, I’m a better ISFJ than you are,” right? And it creates competition, and that’s not good, right?
Chase: 38:09 And that’s why this relationship sucks. There’s a lot of traffic here as they’re trying to travel with these other functions and whatnot – and then the ENTP, ESFJ? Very similar. I remember my ESFJ grandmother forcing me to go, against my will, to family outings, and family events; and I had no desire to go with her whatsoever, but she still forced me, and almost blackmailed me in some cases to actually do it – and I resent that, right? But to her, the social interaction has to be important, and she believed it was her betrayal. She believed they didn’t give her a day in court so she started using her supporting character to control my life; and she controlled my day, that whole day, at that social gathering; and forced me to be there; and smile and wave; and have the narrative that she told me to talk about among these people.
Chase: 38:54 She literally gave me a narrative. Wow. And we’re not really, you know, she’s looking for those morals, not going to find it. I’m looking for that willpower. Not gonna find it, you know. She’s looking for… {laughs} She doesn’t care whether or not I’m intelligent or not. She just cares whether or not I’m moral. Like, this relationship is horrible. There’s so many traffic jams. There’s so much friction. It’s just not going to go well. I mean, if I’m in my ISFJ mode, we can have camaraderie at least, but otherwise the ESFJ’s like, “No. No, no, no, no, no,” and here’s the thing, if I’m really caring with my Fe Child, [the Fe], you know, they just looked at me like I’m some Childish person; or if I start doing the dishes in their own home, for example, they’re going to resent me because it’s like, “Well the dishes is my duty to do. That’s not your duty,” right, and increases competition. And it’s like, “I’m just trying to help you out with the dishes,” but no. They don’t want to do that. ESFJs are not about that with ENTPs, and that’s why there is conflict there.
Chase: 39:54 So then you have ENTP plus INTP, which we did yesterday. This is kind of how the relationship goes. Trying to motivate an INTP to do anything is like pulling teeth out of a camel or a horse, without anesthetic, and they’re perfectly conscious, and you’re probably going to get, well, thrown very far away. Good luck using Ne Hero to motivate Ni Critic. Yeah, that’s gonna work… [So] and of course my Se Demon is going to make Si Child very uncomfortable at times. Yeah. That’s really good. Again these two types have super high camaraderie though. Again: Steve Wozniak-Steve Jobs argument – so they can work together. It’s very shoulder to shoulder though. It is not face-to-face. Shoulder to shoulder, not face-to-face, and because of that, you know…
Chase: 40:45 So if you’re an ENTP with an INTP make sure that you are keeping this in the shoulder to shoulder area. You are not keeping it face-to-face because that will screw you down in the future because an INTP – you’re looking for those morals, Fe Child. You’re going to only find Fi demon, you know. You’re looking to have a good experience from the INTP. Nope. They have Se Trickster. They only care about their experience, and they’re only aware of their own experience. Trying to motivate them? {laughs} That’s not going to work. Trying to prove that you’re smart to them? No, they’re going to slap you down with their Ti Hero and say that you’re dumb. That’s what they do in those cases. Not good; and of course ENTP plus ENTP? Really? Why would you do that to yourself? Not cool.
Chase: 41:23 Now I would like to say one thing, as I lose my voice. Someone had asked recently, “Why is it these two are higher in compatibility than these two?” The reason is: it’s because though they have to travel a longer distance to get down it really comes down to the attitude of the functions. These functions have different attitudes. Remember, you have pessimistic functions and optimistic functions. Optimistic functions are Heroes, Child, Nemesis, and Tricksters. Everything else is pessimistic, right? And when you’re trying to match up an optimist to an optimist, right? It can kind of get… It’s like having primary versus primary. It’s like [it’s like] magnetic polarity. Plus and plus doesn’t go together. You need plus and minus to go together, right, and there’s plus and minus more in the other relationships than there are in these, and it can cause some serious issues, you know?
Chase: 42:26 But it also depends on the level they are because you not only have to concern yourself with [with] attitudes, pessimism versus optimism in that regard. You also have to consider, “Okay. Well [is] is that pessimism or optimism too high or low?” Like, where is it in the scale within the shadow versus the ego, right; and it can be further distance down for when you hit the shadow [versus] or it could be higher distance down from where you’re hitting the shadow. And then, okay, ‘what then?’ you have to ask. Is it optimistic or pessimistic? That’s probably really confusing as hell. The point is it depends on which slot the cognitive function is in. It depends if it’s in the ego versus the shadow. It also depends if it’s optimistic, or if it’s pessimistic, and that is why these types are actually lower compatibility than these because there is nothing to be gained from these.
Chase: 43:17 There could still be some little minuscule thing that could be gained from these relationships, but there’s not really much to be gained from these relationships within this deep, deep, deep, deep, face-to-face, potentially face-to-face in somewhat shoulder to shoulder mixture of a relationship if we’re looking at, like, Venn diagram, okay. Venn diagram – you have face-to-face. Venn diagram you have shoulder to shoulder, and you bring it together, and then boom. You have social friendship compatibility in the center, right? That assumes that you have that there, but this is really one-sided. This is all about camaraderie, you know. Super… [you know] It’s all about camaraderie so it’s really just one side of the coin, right? It’s not both sides of the coin. Whereas this has one side of the coin plus maybe a sliver on the other side. So that’s why it’s technically better. Hopefully that answers your question for whoever asked me. I think I remember who it was.
Chase: 44:07 So anyway, with that, that concludes Season 12 Episode 8 for ‘What Types Are Socially Compatible With ENTPs?’ If you have any questions about ENTPs, or the social compatibility, please leave it in the comments section, and I will answer your comments. I read every single comment on my channel, and answer questions as often as I possibly can. If you’re having a hard time trying to figure out how to type yourself please read, or watch the playlist ‘How to Type Yourself and Others.’ Also [get] go to my website csjoseph.life, and download the Type Grid which you get by the front page. Put in your email, you get your Type Grid. I’m not going to spam you because I’m going to send you private lectures specifically just for the email people to receive in the very near future. I’m hoping to have one out next week. Hopefully.
Chase: 44:52 So yeah. Also please subscribe to the channel. That would be nice. Subscribe to YouTube and on the podcast. That would be awesome, and leave a like while you’re at it. So great. I got many more of these to do, and I’m also going to be releasing a schedule very soon about what days I’m going to be releasing lectures so that you guys are aware of that. So [but I’m] there’s going to be some randomness in there too. So we’ll see. I’m going try to do it on a schedule. Who knows how that will work out, but I want to keep my content constantly consistently flowing on a regular basis. So anyway with all that being said, I’ll see you guys tonight.
