INTJs, Stop Giving up! (and also INFJs, ESFPs, and ESTPs). CS Joseph Responds to the Acolyte question how can INTJs stop running from making decisions.
Transcript:
Hey what’s up ego hackers? Welcome to the show. This is CS Joseph on CS Joseph podcast, and we have yet another acolyte question to share with you folks. Yes. And today’s question is a very interesting one, it is related to INTJ days, and that is how to stop giving up on decisions as an INTJ.
I will admit that a lot of the advice actually placed into this particular episode does also apply to INFJs, and also an AI inferiors, and I will give a little bit of fair warning, this episode might be a little bit more tailored towards INTJ men. And some of the resources that I’ll be sharing will be benefiting them. But it also heavily applies to INTJ. Women as well.
So it’s, it’s for everyone just kind of have to be patient. Yes, there’s a little bit of a slant a male slant in this particular episode. But there’s really not much I could do it because with the amount of time that we have available to do this episode, and as much as we’re just trying to get to the point use relevant examples, I think we’ll be able to get there. So anyway, on to the show.
So yeah, like one of the biggest problems that INTJ has have. So don’t forget, folks, like from an interaction style perspective, they are direct responding. And progression progression is what we would formerly call movement. So progression is all about the journey.
INTJ is that their ego of INTJ, their subconscious of ESFP, and their unconscious V intp. Whenever you have, whenever you have a type that has their ego, their subconscious, and their unconscious, all sharing the same trait from a tight grid point of view, that’s known as a triple XYZ thing. So like, for example, they are triple progression, also known as triple movement, but also INTJ is our triple pragmatic, which means they have the highest level of independence, they’re the most independent people out of the 16 types, which I heartily enjoy as an intp. Especially, you know, from the perspective of, let’s say, a sexual relationship, because I am very independent.
In fact, I, women in my life accused me often of being too independent, like, like, it triggers them with how independent I actually am. And I guess that would make sense why I’m, you know, most suited for INTJ women and also ISFP women because they are super mega independent on their own. And the INTJ woman is actually far more independent than I am. And it’s funny, you know, I have people in my life who complain about me being more independent or about being too independent.
Yeah, I’m suited to be with people who are more independent than I am which, which I like this. I like this idea. I think it’s cool. Why not? Right.
But given that they aren’t direct responding progression, their triple progression, they’re so focused on the journey in their life instead of the outcome to a point, we’ll talk about si demon a little bit and how that kind of gets in the way. But beyond that, we also they’re also triple triple pragmatic, which means that the highest level of independence, because their direct responding progression within their interaction style is their interaction styles. According to Dr. Linda Behrens, you can understand all that with previous seasons.
I believe I talked about it in season two, they get Season Two playlist here on the YouTube channel where I discuss interaction styles at length. Yeah, season two, check out the season two playlist is in that helps you like kind of learn how to use the Type grid for typing people. And the type grid is available right now at Bucha dot app, an interactive type grid, it’s free, you DJ a dot a PP, go to that website Bucha dot app and start using the type right and get educated. Yeah, it’s in you can also like keep track of the people that you type.
So like, why wouldn’t you do that? I mean, it’s a nice little free service that we make available for the ego hacker community so get on that. But anyway, they’re particularly interaction style. According to Dr. Linda Behrens is known as chart the course and we call it the finisher types.
These types are all about finishing, they want to finish they want to be they want to finish on top, it’s from their perspective, the finish is everything. But because of the finishing, they have a really hard time starting things and this is why INTJ is as an archetype of the 16 archetypes, according to Union analytical psychology. Have the bad rap of procrastination. No one procrastinates more than an INTJ and it’s like they have this point of view where it’s like, oh, yeah, I can I could do this thing because from their perspective, life, everything in life is like riding a bicycle.
Everything. Literally everything to them is riding a bicycle and this is because to INTJ is you know they’re the jacket of all trades, master of one, not the master, you know, not the Master of None, jack of all trades master of one, which means they pick one or two, three skills throughout their life, they can master any skill. And that’s ultimately the life purpose of an INTJ is the ability to master any skill. The problem is, is that they have to focus and hone that one particular skill because if they start doing that to another skill, they’ll lose that previous skill.
It’s not unlike the character, Peter Petrelli, and I believe this is Season Two of heroes that came out in like 2010, a long time ago was created by Jeff crane has a fantastic television show. I think it’s available on Hulu right now if you haven’t watched it, I highly recommend it. Peter Petrelli is an INFP. He’s like the main character, he ends up having like these godlike superpowers, because he’s just able to absorb other people’s superpowers and collect a huge collection of superpowers for himself.
And he just became like, unstoppable, but he actually loses his superpowers at one point in time and during the show permanently, because his dad takes them away because his dad can like suck away your your super powers and just keep them for himself. And then you don’t have them anymore. You can like literally take them away. So that’s, that’s what he does.
But he ends up having to take an injection, and I know I’m spoiling the story. But whatever. I mean, it’s really old, who cares, he ends up taking an injection and reengaged a superpower. But this time is the superpower, he has to touch another super human basically.
And he’s able to copy their ability and he can only copy one ability at a time, basically. So that’s, that’s what he ends up doing. He’s able to copy the ability when a time and I always think of this as like the, the INTJ superpower, they could just master really one ability at a time, right? Which is awesome. But it ends up leading to procrastination because they’re like, hey, everything in life is like riding a bicycle i and they end up projecting that onto others.
They actually think that that others can master things just as easily as they can when that’s entirely false. Like that’s completely and utterly false. But whatever it is extroverted feeling Trickster is also extroverted sensing inferior, it’s Introverted Feeling child, they just think that everyone else can be like them and can master skills just like they can. And that’s not true.
It’s not true. So because they have this perspective of oh, all skills are like riding a bike or whatnot, then they just decide to like not really do anything, because it’s like, I can do that. But will they actually be motivated to do it? Not necessarily. And then that’s, that’s one issue that leads to procrastination.
But here’s the primary issue that leads to procrastination. And that is not knowing where to start. And that usually is the problem. People don’t really like INTJ is don’t really know where to start, they they’re all so focused on the finish, they’re also focused on the outcome, instead of the journey, that they don’t even know where to start.
And this ends up becoming a huge, huge issue. And this is why I’ve noticed, like for example, ESTP is intp is an ENTJ is the fellow NTS, the three other entities of the NT types, and he’s been the intellectuals end up being way more successful in life than any other time. Wow, it’s kind of like, kind of helps if I just like actually notice what’s going on in the background. It’s because the the sun is, is peering through the window.
Maybe if you couldn’t shut the curtain that would help me out. Thanks. So my green screen is kind of out of control right now. But it is what it is, who cares? We care about the episode more about the visuals, await INTJ is don’t do that.
So the thing about INTJ is folks like they care so much about like, the visual presentation and how they’re coming off within the videos that they all suck. Eventually, like on the only INTJ that can like actually be successful. YouTube is the one who’s like not afraid. And like literally has no fear and no shame, basically.
But INTJ is having a really hard time getting over their fear and their shame. And that’s also leads to procrastination. But again, most the time, it’s not really knowing where to start. And that comes from this.
This problem. It’s called entitlement. If a child ends up becoming entitled to success, they become entitled they become so entitled to success, that they don’t actually start anything. That’s the problem.
They’re like, Oh, yeah, I can do that. I know I’d be great at that. And because they already they already are imagining the reward in their mind. They don’t actually do it.
This is one of the reasons why INTJ is and thinking about sex more than actually having sex. It’s so funny to me because I see a lot of CS verified INTJ people on the sea is on the ego hacker discord. And it happens all the time you want to get on the eagle hacker discord, go to our link tree, link in the description in the video. The link should be below the or you can go to discord.gg forward slash ego hackers and then just get right into the server password verification process.
And then you’re on the server, assign your roles and then just start participate in the community. It’s amazing. We got almost 1200 People very active community 24/7 active community well moderated and maintained a community and it has special interest groups for people that want to focus on particular topics and things to discuss. And we are taking applications for people who want to start special interest groups.
And maybe even use those special interest groups become creators themselves. Do you continue to the getting the word of union analytical psychology and for size dynamics out there to the rest of the world might want to check that out. But yeah, like INTJ is they get so entitled to success that they just think in their head like, like, even like, from a sexual perspective, they get so entitled to being performing well sexually, that they often just think about sex anyway. And again, this is why the discord I see all these INTJ is talking about sex constantly.
But deep down, they don’t they’re not having sex with anybody. They’re sexualizing things, they’re talking about it, they’re doing surveys, gathering data, but then don’t do anything about it, because they’re oftentimes afraid. They’re afraid that their performance will be terrible. They say the expert sensing inferior performance.
And you know, and then plus the FYI, child entitlement to success just ends up becoming an even bigger problem. So like, that really, actually just sucks. And it sucks for them, it really ends up being a problem. And this is why INTJ is ended up giving up.
I mean, they’re like the polar opposite of Ni hero Naruto. And Naruto is like, hey, you know, you better you know, I have the guts to never give up. And that’s just something that and I hear oh, needs to do that something and I hear just needs to have an enemy heroes actually end up doing this, you know, especially in relationships, like I got INTJ exes who can’t let go of me to this day. And, and they don’t, they don’t want to let go of me.
Because once Introverted intuition here has made its decision about who they actually want, they just can’t let go. It’s a little bit easier for an INFJ to let go. Because when they get their cognitive origin of like connectedness from like another new person, it helps them overwrite their mind. But the thing is, is that when it comes to calling the origin of reverence, from the perspective, which is deep respect, an INTJ, seeking deep respect for themselves out of life, and they want to build to respect themselves, and as much as respect to other people, when they suffer a breakup, it’s like the other person that broke up with them, or that they broke up with doesn’t respect them.
But it’s especially bad for people that break up with the INTJ. Because then it’s like that person is saying, I don’t revere you anymore. I don’t have deep respect for you anymore. And so as a result of that, it gets lodged in their Introverted Sensing demon, and they just can’t let go of that person for literally the rest of their life.
That phenomenon right there, for example, is one of the reasons why I tell men, you know, you don’t wife up women that have two or more sexual partners and our body count, you just don’t do that. And it’s one of the reasons why it’s like, for example, is because INTJ is just can’t let go, they just can’t let go INTJ women, especially J just can’t let go, especially if someone broke up with them. Instead of them breaking up the other person, they really just can’t let go. Or if it was, like muddy to the water where they claim, oh, you know, I broke with that person, but the other person is claiming, oh, I actually broke up with them.
And then that’s going back and forth. And that’s too is muddying the waters. And that also contributes to them not being able to let go as hard as they try. They just can’t, it’s just, it’s just lodged and imprinted permanently on their treated sensing demon.
So yeah. Anyway, that’s, it’s a problem. And it really comes down to unrealistic expectations. The unrealistic expectations of success actually come from Introverted Sensing demon, more so than ni heroes, Introverted Sensing demon, and the Introverted Feeling child combining the other and that’s known as the demonic child.
And this then the demonic child is something that we haven’t really discussed very much within the ego hacker community. But demonic child is basically when the demon function and the child function basically team up, it’s kind of like an interesting form of cognitive looping, right? You know, when the the child function ends up looping along with the hero function, and they end up getting up to no good because there isn’t a parent function to get in the way of that interaction. But what if the hero starts failing in life, what happens then in the parent is still not around? Well, the child function will end up teaming up with the only other hero that is present within the eight functions, which technically is the demon on the opposite side, from a cognitive reflection side, the child functional basically, it’s already used to being in the presence of the battleground of titans from a cognitive reflection point of view. And if you want to learn more about reflector functions, you need to become a journeyman member CS joseph.ly For slash members, become a journeyman member.
Okay, and then watch season 18. And then then you have four episodes devoted to cognitive reflection inside of season 18. They will eventually be released to the public, but you’ll have to probably wait two years to get to that point. So just be aware of that.
But the demonic child is like when the child was already used to being in the battleground of Titans In cognitive looping with the hero, but then the hero is not able to like solve a problem in life, the child ends up going to the demon function the other titan in the battleground of Titans, because he was already with one Titan, and it’s comfortable being with a Titan, but that Titan it failed, the parent function is still absent as the absent parent within the mind, because the parent function is underdeveloped. So it goes to the other titan, which is the demon, okay, and this because and then you have the demonic child as a result, okay. So this ends up causing its sort of sensing demon to have unrealistic expectations where INTJ is get this problem where they expect success with 100% certainty, or they won’t even start the point like, like when it comes to learning a skill or performing in some way, shape or form, unless they are able to get 100% success with whatever it is whatever possible venture it is, with 100% certainty, they’re not going to bother. And honestly, that’s entirely entitled, that is very, very, very entitled.
And basically that means that INTJ is are entitled to success. One of the biggest problems I have with the INTJ is is that is that they are entitled to discuss. And literally, it’s a feigned outcome focus for triple progression type, but that happens because of the demonic child the demon function is the hero function of the ISFJ super ego, right, the ISFJ demon within a within the four sides of the right now if the ISFJ side is being is being angelic, then what would happen is that Introverted Sensing the INTJ needs to learn the lesson of the demon, the lesson of the demon, basically, for Introverted Sensing demon is they need to put more effort. That’s literally what that is.
If you want to learn more about that we have that as a premium lecture because I go through each of the demon functions, what people can do to partner up with a demon functions and transmute their demon into an angel function basically. And there’s an entire lecture series available to that also in the journeyman section as well, CS joseph.ly, forward slash members, and you can log in at CS joseph.ly forward slash portal. But yeah, again, it’s a faint outcome focus for a triple aggression type, okay, they’re triple progression, but they’re so fixated on certainty, because they’re introverted, because they have the demonic child setup. And then you have the Introverted Sensing demon, basically expecting because it’s what it’s sensing is the expectation function, they the Introverted Sensing demon, expects 100% certainty for success.
So, this is called as outcome dependence, and INTJ is suffer with outcome dependence more than any of the types with the exception of maybe the actual ISFJ archetype itself. And this is where we start getting into, you know, super ego on super ego dyads. Right, super ego and super ego dyads. This is something that we haven’t really discussed very much within the Iraqi community because we also been looking at the the Dyads from the perspective of deadly sins and living virtues.
But there is another dyadic way to approach the 16 types and that is looking at super ego to ego relationships. And this was one of the ways that we were able to do that. Basically, it’s an expansion upon the battleground of Titans, right? Where outcome dependence because the ISFJ super ego is outcome based. The INTJ becomes entitled to that 100% certainty with anything that they set out to do.
Because of the ISFJ super ego big blatantly demonic, and this is what leads them to beat to doing shortcuts, and they end up getting upset about failing because the amount of shortcuts they end up taking. Now there is actually a resource. It’s mostly a resource for men. It’s written by Caleb Jones.
I’m not sure if that’s actually his real name, but the book is The unchained man. Recently, a coaching client of mine gave me the book I’ve been reading, I’ve been hella enjoying it. But most particularly chapter three, heavily heavily discusses this topic of outcome dependence. And there’s also an another chapter devoted to just outcome dependence in the book.
This, you know, I’ve recommended like the manual by W anten, to less types to ESTPs and INFJs to help them out. I mean, sometimes I would say, like the rational male Tomasi, to help INTJ is out, but I have strong issues with the red pill as an incomplete praxeology that needs to be further developed and understood because it’s completely blind of Yogi and analytical psychology. But that being said, the unchained man from a nurturer perspective, I think, is probably one of the best books and an INTJ man could ever read and maybe even potentially an INTJ woman to a point. So I definitely do recommend this book.
You guys should check it out. If you want to get a free audiobook, you want to get this audiobook for free. You can do that right now go to CS joseph.ly forward slash reading and get yourself a free Audible account which will come with a free audio book, and you can start listening to this book immediately. Right then in there.
Just go ahead and Help yourself. I think the links are at the very, very top. So yeah, that’ll be, that’d be pretty fantastic free folks. So, anyway, the point is, is that because of this problem because of this, you know, 100% Expectation uncertainty, they end up getting overconfident in themselves, they end up taking shortcuts and the shortcuts because they taking shortcuts or putting in less effort, which means that they’re actually increasing the likelihood that they fail, and they do end up failing, because they’re so obsessed with certainty, that obsession with certainty, ends up leading them to fail, even though three of the four sides of their mind, they are triple progression.
They’re all about they’re supposed to be walking the journey and focusing more on the journey than actually the outcome itself. Like, for example, there’s a woman, an INTJ woman, for example, in my life, and also on the discord server, and she is absolutely obsessed with the certainty of being with you know, like her one and only soulmate. That’s one of the things about INTJ is they’re so obsessed with the soulmate myth, which is chapter one of the rational male, I don’t care if you’re a man or a woman, you need to read that chapter. Because it’s a myth.
There’s no such thing and going out of your way to be with the perfect man, you could do XYZ things blah, blah, blah. Like it’s just it’s just not going to happen. It’s not it’s entirely unrealistic. And it Jays end up becoming entirely unrealistic, unrealistic as a result, and it’s really sad.
It’s really, really sad that this ends up happening, but they do it. And but anyway, because they get so focused on certainty, like NTPs intp is and INTJs all end up statistically more successful than INTJ’s, literally, because INTJ’s are just in the grips of certainty, when they’re not supposed to be in the grip of certainty at all. They’re supposed to be as long as a fair as possible. And it’s because of outcome dependency outcome dependency that is stemmed from the demonic child outcome dependency, which is basically an entitlement to success and entitlement to the outcome.
When you have the demonic child and the child ends up looping with the demon because the parent function is still not there, their responsibility isn’t there. And honestly, if you think about it, it’s entirely irrational behavior. It is irrational for INTJ Jays to take so many shortcuts in life, but the thing is, is they do it constantly, all the while complaining about how everyone else around them is irrational. Wow, hypocrites.
So it just gets stuck focusing on the outcome real or imagined that they end up never actually starting and never actually going in that direction. Because they’re like, there’s no guarantee that I’m going to get success. And it’s funny because you have this, this literally creates an NI hero, who is capable of taking all of the risk in the world and actually being successful without risk. And then the INTJ becomes entirely risk averse.
Like when it comes to INTJ women, for example, Matthew Hussey talks about this in his book, get the guy and he’s like, why aren’t you INTJ girls like, and I’m paraphrasing, because he doesn’t know anything about union analytical psychology, but he’s like, so just project yourself into that into this question. Why are you INTJ women not actually initiating with men? Like why not? I mean, let’s be honest, your TI parent is aware that men are just oblivious entirely. And they’ve been further conditioned to be oblivious by the societal programming in their life. And you can learn all about societal programming from Chapter Three of Caleb Jones book, The unchained man, which I recommend.
Anyway, the bottom line is, is that all this leads to the ions, this leads the INTJ to failure. And this is how an INTJ becomes a failure in life, literally. So yeah, that that continues to be a super major problem. But if you would like to learn one way that could actually help contribute to your success in the very near future, and I believe it will be available on Black Friday, we have our ego hacking by text course that will be coming out very soon, the announcement should be made this week, you guys can pre order it before Black Friday, and then it will be released to the public on Black Friday, I highly, highly recommend you get in on the pre order because I believe you’ll be getting half off and it’s just a one time fee.
And then you’ll have access to it indefinitely. So you might want to check that out. But it’s going to be ego hacking by text where we teaching social engineering, how to social engineer people through text messaging, and emails. And we’re also going to be teaching you how to type people just by reading their text, which is pretty awesome.
And that’s what we’re going to be making available in this course. So check it out. It’s going to be coming up very soon is gonna be called ego hacking by text. And I hope to see you there at the course.
So yeah, anyway, how so now the actual answer the question how to stop giving up our decisions as an INTJ? Well, basically, you have to get to a point where you’re comfortable taking risk without any guarantee of certainty. That’s that’s basically it. You need to figure out where to start things you know, and the INTJ has to have the guts to never give up and continue to take risks. If a child has to keep caring about the project and the journey itself instead of any level of six US do not concern yourself with levels of success, you should actually concern yourself with levels of failure.
You know, outcome is ultimately the enemy. And This especially applies to INTJ men who are actually trying to do like approaching women or cold approach pickup or pickup artistry or whatever that crap is. I mean, they are like, I’m a guy who’s anti pickup artistry for si user men, but I’m very pro pickup artistry for se user men. And like, honestly, you need to just realize that outcome is the enemy like, especially your ni child, or your ni hero, can cognitive loop with your FYI child, for example, INTJ men, and it can be so obsessed with the woman that you actually want, that you end up feeling so bad when she ultimately rejects you, which is a serious problem.
And then you this outcome, this outcome dependence that you have ends up causing you through your edge verted sensing demon, and ultimately, the demonic child, it really ends up inhibiting you from being able to move forward in your life in any meaningful way. Which it just sucks. So keep going. I don’t know why this is not working.
There we go. Maybe it is. Maybe the internet is down. Hopefully not because like, I’m literally filming here.
So yeah. And this should give you the opportunity INTJ is to start and just take risks, stop being so risk averse, don’t be like as risk averse as like an INFJ would because iossef j’s are like insanely risk averse, because they have ni demon and Idema is all about not taking risks, their virtue and vices, faith versus fear. But you’re kind of acting like an ISFJ with faith versus fear and really giving into your fear. And that’s the problem.
That’s why you fail, your fear of failure is actually causing failure in your life. Right? When you need to be okay with just taking risks. And out of all the 16 types, you have no excuse because the event I hear you are the master of risk taking. So go take the risks.
What’s What’s the worst that could happen? Who cares about what’s the worst happen because the more failure you you pile up and failing 1000 times doing something good, because eventually you’ll become successful at doing something. This is why like for example, I had a an Olympic, an Olympian and someone who won worlds recently, Serena, very fantastic INTJ athlete. And I taught her I taught her a very important, very important concept. So shout out to her she’s pretty awesome person.
And think and I would like to thank her again for her review that she left for me, great woman. And I basically was explaining her like, the reason why you have a hard time being successful as an athlete is because you’re comparing yourself to other people. And as I’ve said this to INTJ is in the past, stop comparing yourself to other people, just compare yourself to yourself. And if you do that, and just work on being better than you were previously the day before, over time, you’ll end up outpacing everybody else around you and being more successful than they are.
But that basically requires you to be focused on the journey, instead of the outcome be focused on the progression and not the outcome. As a result you’ll have anything you’ve ever wanted, as explained by Caleb Jones in his book On trade, man. So that’s literally a principle with a promise, a promise that that it’s basically a guarantee INTJ is straight up. That’s a guarantee.
So go check that out, change your life accordingly. Organize your life accordingly. And I promise you the success that you want and that you are looking for so Alright folks, thanks for watching and listening to this episode. I will see you guys on the next one and also on the discord tonight.
