INFJs, Stop Losing Sight of Your Goals | CS Joseph Responds
CS Joseph Responds to the Acolyte question how can an INFJ stop losing sight of their goals. Presented by Chris Taylor, aka Raka.
Transcript:
Welcome to the CSGs a podcast. I’m your host for this episode, Chris Taylor, also known as Raka, bringing you another acolyte question today. And today’s question is, how can INFJ stay focused on the things that they want? This is a great question. The question that I have, however, is, what is the root cause of you guys losing what you want.
And as silly as that may sound, there’s a few different things that can cause you guys to lose sight. Either one, you’re not in any kind of habits. So you get, you go through the motions of the day, and towards the end of the day, you’re like, oh, shit, I didn’t get anything done that I wanted to do. You finally have that like moment of like, Oh, should I was supposed to do that? And so is it an issue of forgetting? Or is it a thing that your what you want is changing.
And there are some common things that will help both of these issues. But I’ll try to go through each one individually first. And hopefully, somewhere by the end of this video, I’ve answered both of these questions sufficiently, both of these symptoms, or these prop root problems that create the symptom of losing what you want. Now, in the first instance, forgetting, like, you’re just not keeping track of it, you wake up in the morning, you don’t have a plan for what you want to do.
laid out, you don’t have an idea of like, how to go about the thing itself. With that, you need to externalize your discipline. I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it to the day I died and keep making these videos that reminder for the beta Quadra that, oh so often forgets these things that they need to utilize their environment to their advantage. But you need to make the discipline external, it’s extroverted sensing, your guys’s si Introverted Sensing your internal sense of discipline, your internal sense of duty.
Your internal awareness is super repressed by your guys’s eyes that are wandering over a bunch of different things that you possibly want. You need to you need to be in an environment that is conducive that is setting you up for success to constantly pursuing the thing you want. Just like INTJ is that can master anything by repetition by like just honing in on that one thing. You guys are similar in the sense that your guys’s direction that you’re going is very dependent on what is going on around you.
And you may have a very fuzzy idea overall of what you want to get at in life. And if you don’t have a core idea of specifically what you will say, it’s just, oh, I want to be in better shape. Well, there’s a ton of ways to go about that. I want a better job.
There’s a ton of jobs out there. And I get it and I hear I really want that job. I really are a job a better thing. I really want to be in shape.
It’s great to have that drive. Fantastic. But like stop. And really look.
Are you actually pursuing a specific thing? Or are you just going I just want something in this general vicinity. And sometimes it’s okay to just have a general course or a general idea of the destination. But understand that the more generalized The idea is or the less planning that you have, the less specific The thing that you’re pursuing is, the harder time you’re going to have approaching that thing. And there’s a delicate balance here.
Because if you get too locked on a specific thing that comes with its own set of problems, because then you’re missing opportunities as a result of just pursuing the one thing. And as much as I want to say there’s a right answer between these two extremes, there’s really not, it’s your life to live. But if you’re in the camp of, it just can’t pursue the thing that I want to pursue, then you need to get more specific. And if the thing that if you’re finding the thing you’re pursuing is not worth wild, then you’re probably latched too hard on to a hyper specific idea.
So there’s kind of weights that need to be applied to this. Depending on which issue you’re having. Now, if you have a strong idea of what you want, even if it’s a vague idea, let’s say it’s a topic, okay? And you want to get into better shape, need to surround yourself by the people that are already there, and ask questions. You should be putting up in the areas that you spend most of your time.
Wherever you’re wasting time. And I guarantee you you’re wasting time somewhere most people do. But I guarantee you guys are wasting time somewhere. And if you just spend a little time really thinking about it, or ask somebody, if you either a you have somebody that lives with you, that’s great a roommate situation.
Or you could ask your friends, hey, what do you think I’d like waste my time on, there’s probably an answer to that. But wherever that spaces, have visual reminders, okay, of what your goal is. And these can be positive reinforcement or negative reinforcement, depending on what works better for you. If you’re trying to get in shape, because you feel like a fat piece of crap.
Or you you just there like you’re if you’re, like drawing more inspiration, because you’re trying to get away from this idea you have of yourself, have something that reminds you of why you’re doing what you’re doing. Maybe it’s a picture of you in an unflattering angle, or like, it makes you cringe. Cringe is your friend. Okay? Cringe is your demon telling you, I don’t want that experience again.
Instead of Don’t, don’t run from that cringe. Don’t Don’t take your ni hero and be like, I’m just gonna get as far away from that as possible. No, embrace that. Use your SAE to constantly remind yourself of that, so that you stay motivated.
Now, again, I just can’t, I really can’t say enough for you guys, that your environment is everything. The people that you’re around whether your house is messy or not. If you’re constantly being reminded of things that aren’t useful to you. change it, change your environment, change the people you are around whatever area you want to be and surround yourself by that it will really go a long way a lot further than I think you guys even realize.
Now, if the problem is not that you’re forgetting, except the problem is, I just don’t want to know what I want to do. Right? If that’s the issue, then you just need to keep trying different things. Right, like I know that that I understand the question is how can I stop losing sight of what I want? Right, which implies that you already know what you want. But like if your idea of what you want, again, it goes back to the thing.
The idea of what you want is still too vague, needs to spend some time actually thinking about it. I like it’s good to have an outline of maybe reduce the steps, okay, reduce your vision out from as far out as it is, to this end goal and point in time and take some time to go, what are the steps between here and there? Make yourself a checklist, make yourself a us a guide, keep it loose enough that things can still change. And so you’re not locked into, I have to do this step I have to do this step, just like this, it has to be exactly like there’s this step has to be, you need to let go of that. Right? Like, it’s okay for the plan to deviate a little bit.
But if you have a charted out, goal in mind, okay, you write down, this is the next step I want to do from where I’m at. Okay, if you’re not working out in all right now, maybe it’s okay, I’m gonna go for, I’m gonna start going for walks. Okay, that’s, that’s step one, I’m gonna first get out of the house, I’m gonna go go on a walk. Step two, from there is okay.
You know, maybe it’s, I’m going to start watching videos on specific exercises, targeting specific areas that I need to work on. That would be step two, then maybe it’s finding somebody to go to the gym with the order isn’t the most important. What I’m trying to get at is, you need to have some kind of vague outline, at least of the steps involved to get you from point A to point B. And remember that they are steps, you don’t get from the first floor to the second floor by one step, you get to the first floor to the second floor by like 10 or 20 steps of flight.
Okay, so each one of your goals needs to represent maybe a couple steps at a time. Okay, maybe it doesn’t have to be 20 steps to get from point A to point B. But the idea here is that you chart out to a degree. Okay, here’s, here’s the first step I need to do then the next step.
Don’t just try to jump from A to B, or in this case, A to Z. Right. The other thing this helps with is when you start to struggle, and you have this paper with you, okay, there’s this, this laid out, maybe it’s on a computer, it doesn’t really matter. I’m more of a proponent of pen and paper, personally.
A lot of other beta Quadra that I know, in my life, a lot of the beta Quadra in my life that I know. Prefer pen and paper as well. That’s okay. Just make sure it’s somewhere that you’ll always go to, and leave it there so you don’t lose it.
But if you start to have troubles, and you’re like, I don’t know what to do next, when you go to ask people for help, which you need to do. When you start to ask people for help, you actually have something in front of you. You’re not just going well, I don’t know. It’s kind of just it’s hard.
I don’t know what to do. I want to work out I want to get in shape, but I just don’t know what Okay, well, what have you tried? I don’t really remember it. First not. You’ll have something to be like, here’s my plan.
Here’s what I’m trying to do. Here’s the next step. This is what I’m struggling with. And then that person can actually sit down with you and go, Oh, you’re struggling with this specifically.
Okay, yeah, here’s how, here’s how I suggest going about it. You’re externalizing the process instead of trying to do te trickster in your head. You have it down, and other people can see what you’re thinking. And other people can actually help you get those steps and it’s not just oh, I don’t know.
It’s hard. I don’t remember exactly. I tried that but and then you’re relying on your memory. Does that really ever work for you guys? externalize your guys’s headspace, for the love of God, please externalize it so people can actually help you.
And so that you can help yourself and see what you’re actually struggling with. Beta Quadra as a whole Oh, my God. You guys try to do everything in your head. Everything.
Like I’m Delta Quadra and I have a hard timed with that at times. But you guys like, want to default to that it is not doing you any services to try to do everything internally. Having te trickster only means in this case, guess your organization skills might not be the greatest. Like, you’re not going to be aware of what other people are actually thinking and the structure of their logic versus your own.
But that doesn’t mean that just because you have a child, you need to do everything in your head. You even if you did, even if you had the perfect logical structure, by the time you get to the end of it, you’re likely going to forget or you go to sleep or you take a nap and suddenly poof, it’s all gone. If you want specific help with this, we do offer coaching, we can get you pointed in the right directions to people that can help you. If it’s a general health, fitness issue, or goal, or business goal, we have placed a space for that in the discord special interest groups that are specifically a collection of people all interested in that same thing.
There’s going to be a lot of people that are able to give you some advice on on those specific instances. We’re here to help if you guys want specific coaching, if you feel like your problem, or your goal isn’t something that you want to go to other people about. That’s okay too. Coaching has confidentiality will help you otherwise, the free side there is a discord.
Head there and bring with you the notes of your plans so that people know how to help you. And you found this helpful, useful, insightful, leave a comment below. I’ve been checking all the comments on the videos anytime I have a release, I will tend to watch them like a hawk I try to reply to what I can reply to. If there are criticisms, let me know even if I don’t reply, I take them into consideration and try to apply it to the next to the videos that I produce later.
And if if there’s ever a time where I don’t you don’t feel like I’m answering your questions properly. Also leave that as a comment. I’m on the discord. If you ever see me answering an acolyte question and you fell feel like I didn’t answer your question properly reach out to me in DMS.
Worst case scenario, I’ll either answer it there, or I’ll reshoot a video on it. If it really just didn’t get it. Anyway, I’ll catch you all in the next video. Have a good night.
