ENFJ WOMEN CHOICE | CS Joseph Responds
CS Joseph responds to the Acolyte question why ENFJ women can take to long too make decisions.
Transcript:
Hey what’s up ego hackers? Welcome to see it’s just a podcast. Today’s question, why do ENFJ women take a long time to choose their men and also rely on other people’s opinions in terms of making their choice for the men in their lives? What a fascinating question to be sure. And glad this one has been asked. So to the acolyte member out there who asked this question, good on you for asking this question because it’s excellent.
And be happy to share some comments about ENFJ women and some of their mating strategies. But let’s talk about NF J’s least ENFJ women just a little bit. So ENFJ women have this thing, you know, the female sexual strategy known as hypergamy. And like all NF J’s, they have some struggles, struggle struggles, like with their Introverted Thinking inferior, they’re very insecure about what they know, they’re very insecure that what they’re doing lines up with facts lines up with the truth, basically.
And that’s what’s happening. They also have is really feeling nemesis. So ENFJ, women naturally worry about their self worth and constantly questioning whether or not they’re worthy of somebody, or whether or not someone is worthy of them. Both actually apply.
So I can be a problem, especially when you’re trying to get involved in the, you know, yield the dating pool, basically. And especially for NF J’s in Western society, I actually had the pleasure of meeting an ENFJ woman, actually, in a bar just down, like, literally next door to this one. And got to know her single mom. I don’t think her boyfriend likes me very much.
And yeah, but I invited her and her boyfriend to my birthday party, and only she showed up, so it was fine. And she got to enjoy a couple of cocktails. And we played Disney against humanity. It’s like Cards Against Humanity, but Disney mode, basically.
Which, in my opinion, is far more of an egregious game than regular Cards Against immunity. My God, like how sick and twisted you gotta be, right? Well, if you want to be sick and twisted, like I do, I play Disney against humanity. So but yeah. Anyway, it’s really thinking inferior ends up becoming this big problem that ENFJ women have to deal with, of course, any ENFP ENFJ men as well, but ENFJ women, women are utilizing their hypergamy wishes the female sexual strategy, basically, and they’re utilizing their strategy to basically choose their men.
Because for example, if you give a bunch of women to a man who will play if you give a bunch of women or a bunch of men to a woman, she will choose right, she will make that decision. Right, and she will utilize her hypergamy. Hopefully, it’s managed. Thank you, Stephanie, for the concept of managed hypergamy versus open hypergamy hypergamy being a female sexual strategy, which means women oscillate between choosing men who provide beta traits, which is parental investment, provisioning and protection versus men with alpha traits, which has high level of intelligence, wisdom, they’re very authoritarian they make they don’t listen to authority, because they themselves are the authority.
They also have what’s called Alpha fitness, a very fit and very capable, also potentially capable as a fighter and they just don’t take crap from anyone nor do they care about what other people think of them. So it’s the Alpha traits basically, it just makes things difficult for inter intuition parent because Introverted Intuition parents like okay, I have to make a choice but Introverted Intuition parent in their early years is very impulsive. This is why potentially ENFJ woman could have an extremely high body count, right? Which basically reduces her value. And for those out there who questioned whether or not high body count actually reduces a woman’s value.
It absolutely does. Men care about sexual intimacy so much that the idea of having the risk of a woman comparing his sexual prowess and his sexual performance to that of any other man that she has had sex with in the past, which basically happens every time because when women have sex with a man, they’ll basically never forget him. He’s basically in print Did upon her forever. And so she has this huge wide library of men that she’s slept with basically inside of her head, and she’s constant in her hypergamy.
And she can’t help it her hypergamy is constantly comparing because hypergamy is a sexual strategy exists to optimize which man she is supposed to be with, basically. And it’s that level of optimization that men concern themselves with, this is why to men, virgins are the highest value, because if he is her only sexual experience, she only has him to compare against. And thus, he doesn’t have to have to deal with the stress of dealing with, you know, problems related to sexual prowess within the concept of their relationship, especially since most people don’t get with people who are basically sexually compatible with them to begin with. And that too, can cause a lot of problems.
So when I parent, and I parents gotta be responsible someday, right? And my parents got to make The responsible decision about like, Well, who do I want to be with? Who? Which man do I give myself to? ends up being the question that the ENFJ woman has to answer? The problem is, is that in order to guide that choice, she has to rely on Introverted Thinking inferior, and Introverted Thinking inferior, psychologically, is a very insecure function. It’s not very secure with how it thinks. So an ENFJ woman is not very secure with what she thinks is the truth, right? Or what she thinks is factual. And she relies on making decisions based on facts.
Problem is, is that women have this problem where they’re actually much better with perception than they are with decision making. Whereas men is the other way around. Men are entirely oblivious. That’s why they lack perception.
And they’re much better at making decisions, which is judgment. This is ultimately why men are considered the head of the home or head of the household, in a marriage or monogamous relationship situation, right. So this ends up presenting a lot of issues. Because they’re afraid that what they think isn’t accurate, right, combined, that that they are worried about whether or not they’re worthy enough, that ends up creating a lot of problems.
But then they have the pressure in their head, especially as a woman gets older, to make a decision in terms of what man she wants to be with. So because she’s very insecure about what she thinks she has to go to other people and engage expert feeling hero and find out like, Hey, do you value this man? You know, which is kind of funny if you think about it, because extroverted thinking demon has this issue with Introverted Thinking inferior, because you watch these NF J’s, right? Going to other people, they’re like, hey, what do you think about this guy? Do you think he’s good for me? Right? They always ask that, you know, how do you feel about this guy? I mean, I kind of like him. He likes me, but I’m not sure if I know that he’s the right. He’s the right one.
For me. He’s the best one for me, right. And it’s so interesting, because Introverted Thinking inferior types, especially ENFJ. Women, they have this thing where they expect everyone else to listen to them, but they don’t listen to anybody.
Right? They don’t listen to anybody. And that creates a lot of problems creates a lot of problems for them. So they end up gathering up a lot of opinions from other people that they almost entirely dismiss, they end up going out of their way to figure out what people value in this particular man and get other people’s opinions about this person’s about this particular man before she makes the decision. But almost always, the NFJ woman actually ignores everything that other people say about a particular man.
She often ignores good things. And she also like or bad things, right? And she’ll just still make her decision anyway, which I find is entirely hilarious. And just a testament that you cannot take a woman out her word, you just can’t. Because it’s not because women are liars.
That’s not what I’m saying. Again, it’s because women change their mind so much. Men don’t change their mind. That’s why men are superior with judgment because they just don’t change their mind.
Think Pareto Principle. 80% men don’t change their mind 20% of time they do, whereas the reverse with women 80% of the time, women will change their mind 20% of the time they don’t right. So you can’t take a woman at her word, especially an ENFJ woman because she’s constantly going to change her mind about what she thinks is true or false, consistently, which is what causes are ultimately to dismiss other people’s opinions. Because again, ti inferior naturally expects everyone else to listen to it.
While it doesn’t listen to anyone. So if people are actually going to say negative things about a particular man, it’s more than likely she’s actually going to end up going for him, which I find hilarious for guys is a bunch of positive things. So she’s younger, if they if people say a bunch of positive things about a particular guy, if she’s much older, especially if she’s like towards the wall, which is late 20s, early 30s, because when a woman is 31 years of age, she loses 20% of her fertility, the quality of her fertility starts to drop year after year at age 31. So women all have this biological clock that’s ticking in their head, you know, hey, I should probably get with a man, I should probably consider being a mother, I should probably consider having children.
And then it really become consciously aware of that physical limitation until like their late 20s. This is why statistically, most women, in today’s day and age get married at 29 years of age. So they at least they can claim that they got married in their 20s. And it’s so interesting.
You know, I was in a relationship with an ENFJ. Once in fact, actually, the season three, episode season three, episode three, no C three, episode four, which is who are the NF J’s is predominantly about my dad. It’s also predominantly about my E and F. J.
X. Her name was Kim. She’s, she’s actually very sweet, good person. But it just didn’t work out because she became really disrespectful and very ungrateful.
But there’s so many people in her life that told her to not get with me, too. And like, like, you know, I was a bad influence. I was the bad boy, basically. And it’s so interesting to watch, because that just made her want me all the more is hilarious is really hilarious.
I had no ill intent towards her whatsoever. I actually did love her, I actually did care for her. And I went out of my way to, you know, have a great relationship with her until things definitely started going south. Which led to our, you know, eventual eventual breakup.
But the point is, is that, yeah, she asked other people their opinion, or other people share their opinion, her and she just auto dismiss them because of extroverted thinking demon, right? It ends up becoming a big, big problem, right? So again, you know, we’ve been talking about the test of the demon recently. And the test of the demon basically is for an ENFJ, especially an ENFJ woman to be like, okay, maybe I should rely a little bit more on other people’s opinions about some of my decision making, right? Instead of just relying on their own decision making, which often actually ends up getting them in trouble, especially the younger they are. The younger they are, the more naive they are with the less sexually experienced they are, especially when it comes to long term relationships, less experience they have with long term relationships, the more likely they’re just going to dismiss people and make the wrong choice. This happens because women in Western society are conditioned and trained on what to expect from men, but they are not conditioned and trained on how to treat men, right.
Whereas the opposite with men, men have this issue where they are taught how to treat women, but they are not taught what they can expect from women. And that ends up leading to fatherlessness basically, you know, the, the Mimimi ism of our very solipsistic, Western society ends up causing a lot of problems over time. And people just, they’re not even aware of that they’re not even they’re not even down for that they don’t even know what the risk is that they’re taking when it comes to having these relationships, you know, especially because the naivete So, this is why ENFJ women typically end up having very large body counts. In fact, I know a lot of barflies, because I play pool at various bars in town and whatnot and a lot of bar fights and a lot of them are NF j’s and I see them with different men every single week.
You know, and I, I try my best to not be a regular at a particular bar, you know, because having a reputation of being a Barfly yourself is not exactly ideal, you know, I’m still you know, a UD UF E and TP and care about mo reverence a lot, right? So I care about my reputation. And but these women, you know, they don’t really care about the reputation, te demon just doesn’t care. So then their body count ends up going up. And then their value is to men and in general as up going down because no man wants to compete with the mental imprints other men have left on that woman basically.
So competition reduction, mental competition reduction, men try to go for the you know, women who are far more naive, the way less sexually experienced because the sexual experience that men want to share with those women are specific to those men and specific to those women within the context of just them within that relationship. But the idea of having other men floating around in her head is just unconscionable to them. It’s entirely unconscionable. This is why these relationships are set up the way that they are.
This is why ENFJ women end up having these struggles consistently. I don’t envy them. I don’t envy them at all. Like at all.
It sucks, it sucks to be an ENFJ woman, a young ENFJ. This is why their golden pair is the INFP, which is Extraverted Thinking and fury. And then it aspires and has this insanely valuable opinion and opinion that an ENFJ should be listening to. But yeah, bottom line is, the reason why they take too long, is ultimately because they’re taking too long because their ni parent is trying to be responsible with what they want, or who they want, and what their choices especially when it comes to sexual relationships.
That’s why these women takes such a long time to make this decision. The problem is, while they’re out there gathering information about a particular guy, the younger they are, the more likely they’re going to go for the go for him. If people are giving her bad opinions, the older she is, and the higher body count, statistically. Hence, the lower value she has, the more likely she’s going to rely on the good opinions or people saying good things about the particular guy in question, right? Which is so confusing and very difficult.
But you know, welcome to Women in the context of Western society. Welcome to E INFJ. Women. So how do ENFJ women actually solve this problem for themselves listening, they have to practice active listening, they have to take themselves out of their pride because they’re very prideful, and stop trying to be the teacher and humble themselves in a feminine way, and become the student basically, student versions of themselves to be the students of the man that she has an eye on.
And then at that point, she’ll be able to get a lot healthier input about him first. Now, it’s not a bad thing that a woman is going around asking other people their opinion about her man, a lot of women do this and especially ENFJ women need to do this. Let’s be straight they need to do this. The thing is, though, is that they should spend a little bit more time being patient and not relying on si trickster, gathering even more information up first, before and more input before making a decision.
And actually like spend time weighing it out. Seriously, they just need to spend more time. Patience is everything. So you ENFJ women out there, please practice more patience.
You’ll be far more successful than you realize, I promise. Anyway, folks, thanks for watching and listening. And I’ll see you guys in the next episode.
