Transcript:

Welcome to the CS Joseph podcast. I’m your host CS Joseph, back for another acolyte question this evening. Tonight’s question, is a secure woman a good choice for a sexual relationship? Which is very fascinating question. Most people would think that this question is kind of vanilla, but not me, I see a question like this.

And I’m just like, Okay, I need to stop here for a second to think about this, because this is actually mega cerebral. Because it is a very cerebral question. A lot of people think, you know, especially if you’re, you know, getting used to Union analytical psychology, you’re looking at Union a little bit of psychology from the lens of for size dynamics. And then also maybe, you know, big five tests, this system, all these different systems out there True Colors, as well.

Understanding DSM five and dark triad traits, all these different classifications when it comes to understanding personality. But one of them is fascinating. And that is something known as attachment styles. And in my opinion, attachment, I’m a little under the weather guys.

So forgive me if I sound a little off, because I am off. So from an attachment style, perspective, attachment styles, in my opinion, actually do map directly to each of the 16 types, and may actually readily map to the 16 types as well as their octagon variants, right. There various octagon variants from there. And from that perspective, I think that, you know, oftentimes, people are not entirely sure of what to do when faced with those issues.

But one particular attachment style is secure attachment style. I mean, that is why we’re doing this video, right. So the secure attachment style, which, you know, most people will think that secure attachment style is like the thing that you want most is the thing that everyone needs to work on. I kind of disagree.

I don’t really care that much about attachment styles, especially when you consider octagon because like for example, if I’m a UD UF NTP, I should be with an INTJ. Who is ut UF, basically, to that that perspective? Or an ISFP? Who’s SDSS? Right? And those are the ideals. But do those ideals prevent me from having relationships with women? No. They don’t, especially with how fleeting cognitive focus actually is, right? Because it can change on a dime, it can change, it could change on a whim, right? So, so why, why would I put that much investment? You know, on the focus, I mean, I put decent amount of investment on the cognitive element side, but not but not so.

But like, thing is everyone is different, you know, and I like enjoying the variety of the world and the variety of humanity that we have based on how everyone is ultimately different. And this is one of the reasons why I like because people come up and ask me it’s like, Okay, Mr. CS, Joseph, why are you you know, married to an ESTP woman has a kindred relationship. It’s one of the four fling relationships.

That is not exactly a relationship to build a foundation on, especially to build a family on Twitch, I would agree with them. But the thing is, you know, to quote Selena Gomez and her song, the heart just wants what it wants. And that’s the thing. I’m heart temple, folks, I just follow my heart, and I can’t help it.

I can’t help myself. I can’t help myself but follow my heart. And that’s what I’ve always done. Sometimes I follow my heart regardless of the pain and suffering it brings me but think about it this way.

Like, would I have really been able to actually pull off my mission here on this YouTube channel on this podcast with Bucha with ego hacking by text or with any of these horror you know, the AUC degrade the Type grid, and pretty soon origin access with our new release of the Rosetta Stone, which we’ll be providing in the EBT masterclass if you don’t have the masterclass yet. I recommend it offers.cs Joseph dot life forward slash EBT dash masterclass. Go to that page, get the masterclass. So we have a two to three hour stream on the final Tuesday of January.

And we are going to completely rip wide open everyone’s understanding of cognitive functions entirely. Oh yeah. There’ll be complete and utter paradigm shift for the ego hacker community. Total paradigm shift.

You guys might Want to get in on that? While you still can. And also, if you by the master class, you aren’t able to make it to the stream. That’s okay. That’s okay.

Because you’ll be able to review the court recording whenever after the fact. So no pressure, no pressure. So Be that as it may secure attachment styles, that can be a problem. So why, you know, because people have these assumptions, that they’re so great, just like people have these assumptions that golden pairs are so great, or that natural pairs are so great, or your spec pair is so great at the challenge pair has so great, you know, the four out of the eight relationships that are for long term relationships, and not short term relationships, like the companion, or the intrigue, or the trust, or the Kindred is, you know, and, and I’m married to my Kindred, you know, and technically on paper, the Kindred is the hardest of the eight to actually maintain.

But it’s only through sheer force of will, through human nurture, that we’re able to maintain our relationship as best as we have over the years. And yeah, definitely a huge amount of pain has been suffered as a result. The thing is, though, is that this community has heavily benefited from my pain and suffering, you know, as a result of all of my relationships, because I pay attention, I pay attention to everything, I pay attention to all of them all the way in my life, I pay very close attention. And every single thing that they do that they say how I act, all of it is tracked, understood, categorized, made, sense, analyzed, and amazing anecdotes are created as a result.

And those anecdotes end up going into thought experiments as input for thought experiments, which allows me to arrive to conclusions to be able to bring this next level content for you, folks, so you guys can have better lives, and so that you don’t have to suffer what I have suffered. So you could in effect, realize that it’s because of my suffering, that you guys end up having a better life, right? No different than Lutheran speech, and I believe, Episode 10, or 11, of andorre. When he’s talking to his spy, Lonnie, that he has in the ISP, the Imperial Security Bureau. So that’s important, right? Maybe all should pay very close attention, you know, to the benefits of my suffering, right.

And one of those benefits is I realized that secure attachment styles is bullshit. It’s really not that important, you know, because the Dr. Graham and Dr. Ram variants has a much higher weight than attachment style.

But I was like, oh, you know, you got you got to work hard on being secure. Got to have a secure attachment style, you got to be secure in your relationship, to which I realized that’s actually fundamentally false, very fundamentally false. A lot of people don’t realize how, or why that is the case. But it is the case it is false.

It is the case. Why? Well, because of something that I read in Esther perils book known as mating in captivity, which I recommend you guys check out. It’s a chapter before the chapter titled when three threatened to, which is the chapter talking about how when you have a child, your entire relationship is going to get thrown upside down. And yeah, that’s basically because it’s advice for nuclear families.

And I’m entirely against nuclear families entirely against them. You got to have a polygynous family, or you have to have a very large, multi generational family, where everyone is very close to each other. And adults can easily exchange children and resources to make things a little bit easier on everybody, right? And all the children are exposed to a high amount of different psyches. But the you know, the American nuclear family unit has a travesty.

And it’s no wonder our children are so much. So far less intelligent than the children in other countries and other nations, or children are consistently beat by other nations. Constantly, everywhere you go, especially even in some cases, third world countries. Those children are just smarter, because they’ve been exposed just so much more than our children have.

Our children are just being exposed to Disney plus, whereas those children are being exposed to things that could kill them in the desert or in the jungle or wherever. Right, you know, so think about that. Think that’s gonna I think that pain and suffering is gonna make a higher quality more intelligent child than children who are watching Sesame Street all day long. Think about that.

So the point is being secure attachment, or being secure within the context of a relationship isn’t actually helpful. And this is shown why and Esther perils mating in captivity. The reason why is because security in terms of a sexual relationship actually comes from something called closeness, right? And closeness ultimately ends up destroying, like the sexual fabric of the relationship itself. closeness is anti attractive.

It is anti sex it is. It’s gross, ultimately, in the long run. Yeah, you know, women want to get really close to men, men really want to get close to women to the point where those men are inside of the women. But then afterward, they come apart again, and should be apart for a bit, a little bit, maybe as long as like 24 hours, who knows maybe as long as 20 minutes, who knows? I don’t know.

But the point is, is that without sexual tension, without tension, without anxiety, without insecurity, the relationship attraction just breaks down. And the sexuality of the relationship itself breaks down. Therefore, closeness is the killer of any sexual relationship. This is why men that I coach, I tell them consistently, that if they are in a sexual relationship, the need to make sure that they are introducing tension into the relationship in whatever capacity in order to keep the sexual relationship alive, because the closer they are to their women, then the sexual relationship is going to die, basically.

And this comes from the old adage, you know, absence makes the heart grow fonder. It’s from the Disney’s Robin Hood film, where Robin Hood is courting maid, Marian. And that’s basically how that works. Absence makes the heart grow fonder, because of sexual tension, because of anxiety.

So men, when you’re in a relationship with a woman introduce some anxiety, because the reality of the situation is, and this is a very bold statement, a woman who is secure in her relationship is ultimately a bad woman, for the relationship. You didn’t you do not ever, ever want your woman to be 100% secure in the relationship. That is you as a man allowing her to get way too close to closeness. And there’s not enough tension, there’s not enough anxiety, you as a man need to be unpredictable, you as a man need to have conversations with other women interactions with other women to increase that competition, anxiety and your woman, you know, maybe even go so far as to have a polygynous lifestyle where you do actually have sexual relationships with other women, and your woman is aware of that, etc.

Because it leverages competition anxiety, it leverages tread game basically to a point. Because they realize that in order to keep you they have to compete for you, right. And it’s so fascinating because of this huge debate with the women in the sexuality, special interest group on the ego, hackers Discord server, if you want to get on that Discord server, just go to discord.gg forward slash ego hackers and authorized and get on in and then go scroll to the bottom, find the sexuality SIG s IG special interest group, and then click the Accept button. And then it’ll be added into the channels.

And you can have discussions in the most active channel on the server, which is the female issues channel. Right. So but you know, one of the things that was brought up by some of the girls earlier today was that, you know, well, what about favorites? You know, like, if you’re in a polygynous relationship, does the man play favorites? To which I respond? No, the man does not play favorites. He does not have favorites.

And then I argue if a man does have favorites, it’s not his fault. Nor is it his responsibility. Because for example, if I were to come home to one of my women, and she cusses me out, the second I walked through the door, I’m just going to immediately turn around and leave and then go home to another woman, basically. Right.

And then for what the next 24 hours and maybe that entire week, the woman that cussed me out, based on her actions, made the other woman that I went home to my favorite for the time being right. And that is based on her choice that is based on her actions. You know, we judge women based on their actions. We don’t judge them based on their words, because women in their words, they changed their mind so much.

And you can’t really trust the judgment of women when compared to their perception, you absolutely can trust their perception. You know, that’s why, you know, it’s said that women are the neck, but not the head. Men are the head there. They’re there to be decision makers.

But the decision maker doesn’t always have all of the information. And the information is basically in the hands of women with their perceptive capabilities, because they can gather information better than men can. This is why women are much better at being spies and scouts than men are. And that’s been proven many times.

That’s why there aren’t any women around to fulfill that role. Then feminine. Males have feminine types, like the ESTP, for example, are the best spies and scouts out there, because of how feminine they are, right? Because they have higher perceptive capabilities. So but women in general struggle with having good judgment, because their judgment and proof of proper judgment, because their judgment is based on emotions, not based on logic or rationale.

But men have really terrible perception, and often end up making decisions based on bad information, right? This is why men and women should be in relationships, men are attracted to women with the most obvious highest perceptive capabilities. And women are attracted to men to the highest judgment, the highest proof of judgment, basically, right. And this is all very big, important. Proof of judgment, right.

So from this perspective, that’s ultimately how these people are getting into relationships with one another. But if a woman, if a woman is secure, and her relationship, she is bad for the relationship, she will end up destroying the relationship, especially if she’s in break phase, especially if she’s in development phase, she will automatically lose respect for her man, because she is secure in the relationship, because and she will also no longer be attracted to him, either. Sucks to be him. But that’s the truth.

That’s the truth. So men need to be wise and make sure that they’re introducing anxiety, maybe even introducing competition into their relationships, to keep their women attracted. Because if they don’t, in a committed relationship, what happens is that statistically, women will let their bodies go, quality of sex goes down, and quantity of sex goes down. So basically, the very few things that men are getting out of a relationship.

They’re not getting any more. You know, women get a lot out of men in relationships, because men are assess like businesses, right? And they treat men like businesses, sometimes like vending machines, for most security, my comfort, my money, Mama, all these things. men treat women like art, they assess women like art. So what business is the art piece have making itself uglier? You see what I’m saying? So when that happens, there’s a problem.

So to keep that art piece from decaying, got to introduce some anxiety got introduced and some tension got to introduce some competition. In order to keep that playing field healthy. To keep your Venus in orbit of you, the Sun of your solar system. She has to be in proper orbit, she has to understand that if she gets out of orbit, well, then you’re going to get a different Venus who will orbit you properly, and have that Venus crash into your old Venus and knock the other one out.

Because that’s what’s going to happen. Because the sun you know, will slowly flare in this fiery Whipple come out of the sun and smack the Venus. They’re like, hey, get back in proper orbit, or there’ll be another Venus coming right into, you know, ping pong you out or just like a pool table, you know, like a cue ball hitting another ball and pushing the other one out of orbit entirely. Because that’s what will happen, you know? Because the more you make a woman secure in a relationship, the more she feels her replaceable.

The more she feels irreplaceable, the more disrespectful she becomes, the worse she is as a woman. So you have to consistently introduce tension. You have to consistently introduce anxiety and competition, ultimately, in order to prevent that. And it has nothing to do with playing favorites, especially if you’re in a polygynous lifestyle has nothing to do with playing favorites.

The women on their own will decide just because of their nature, their chaotic nature, and how they act and how they behave their behavior. Their choices will decide for you as their man will Which one of them is your favorite? Because it’s based on which one of them you can stand at that particular moment, right? Because I don’t care what woman out there is claiming that she’s never going to be bitchy, she’s never gonna be a problem, she’s never going to shit test you, she’s never gonna, there’s never gonna do that. That’s crap. You can’t, you can’t listen to that.

They always will. I mean, they don’t even have a choice because you just look at their cycles, they really don’t have a choice. They can minimize it by making sure they’re as healthy as possible, right? But they kind of really just don’t have a choice. So in that particular moment, you just accept that, hey, that’s just how life is.

That’s just life. So while you’re having while you’re being horrible, right now, I’m just gonna go over here, right? You enjoy your anxiety, you enjoy your competition, you enjoy your tension, because it’ll make you want me more anyway. Right? They’ll make you be more attracted to me anyway, in the long run, you may not think that that’s how it is. Now, you may not agree with that claim.

But your actions have proven that to me over and over and over. So. So I’m just like, okay, you know, I gotta go over here. And then when you want me back, you let me know, right.

And then they always come crawling back, every time, every single time. So nothing wrong with that. It’s just how life works. So it’s not about playing favorites.

It’s not about it’s not about security. Never, ever allow a woman to be secure in their relationship. The second you do that is the second you lose her. The second the second you lose that is the second that she becomes a burden on you as a man.

And that is true of all women of all the 16 types. I don’t care how feminine she is. I don’t care how masculine she is. I don’t care what her Okta gram is, I don’t care what type is, it doesn’t matter.

It applies, it applies to all of them, because gender, biological, gender, still supersedes union analytical psychology, it’s still supersedes the four sides of the mind. And you have to remember that you always got to keep that in mind. Gender matters. Women are so self centered, and they’re so subsistent.

They’re so entitled, and so focused on themselves. And also combined with their lesser judgment when compared to men. And then combine that with their higher level of perception, where they can gather so much information. They just don’t know what to do with it.

And men suck at gathering so much information. But they know what to do with it when they have it because they’re just better at decision making. Right? You know, the woman is the neck and the man is the head. If you haven’t watched the explanation and My Big Fat Greek Wedding, then what the hell is your problem? That’s a great film.

It’s also a sad film if you think about it, because it just hella illustrates the what a an explorer expired woman looks like and has to go through when she’s in transition and security phase, basically. So yeah. But anyway, you know, they don’t tell you at the end of the movie is that within five years, she’s probably going to divorce the guy. Because development phase.

Because 83% of divorce the United States is initiated by women, especially women in their late 30s. Yay. Yay. So like men get very much out of relationships with women anyway, it’s why men don’t really get much out of marriage anyway.

Families are being destroyed because families not even existed because men are not interested in investing in that. Well, gentlemen, it makes it a lot easier for you to invest in those relationships. If you are introducing tension, anxiety, and competition, when it comes to your time and attention and resources to any woman that you’re in a relationship with. That’s how you keep them.

That’s how they stay sexy. That’s how they stay desirous and it keeps the sex good. If you don’t do that, well, then they become disrespectful, bitchy, and ultimately a burden to you such that you may not be able to handle them being in your life anymore. So that’s a cool reality of the world.

So the bottom line is this insecure woman who is secure in her relationship is bad for the relationship. Thanks for watching, folks. I’ll see you guys in the next video.

 

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