S3E1 – Who Are The ESTJs?

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Chase: Hey, guys. We’re back. We finished a really good series on how to type anyone: yourself, anyone, interaction styles, temperaments. We also went over the type grid. It was a fantastic series. Ten videos. It was pretty good for depth psychology focusing on human nature.

Chase: I also just started a new playlist today that will be focusing on human nurture, and I’ll be adding videos to that playlist as well. We’re going to be doing human nature and human nurture in parallel moving forward.

Chase: Today we’re starting a new human nature series. We’re going to be doing deep dives into each of the 16 archetypes according to Jungian analytical psychology. Of course, we’re going to be starting with the first one according to our type grid, the very top left hand corner, and that is the ESTJ, also known as the overseer.

Chase: ESTJs are very common. They are part of the SJ temperament, which makes them 40% of the world’s population and pretty common. They take charge, very traditional, and they also like doing a lot of crazy things.

Chase: Also, I’ve noticed something, statistically, ESTJs are the most physically fit of all the types. They’re the ones that really take eating right and going to the gym extremely seriously. I have known more ESTJ athletes than I have any other type to be honest. A lot of the gym babes that you would see, the majority of them are actually ESTJs. For some reason the gym really appeals to ESTJ culture for some reason. I don’t blame them because I can see the benefits, so that’s why I’m going to the gym, too, right?

Chase: Let’s start with our deep dive today on the ESTJ. Got my trusty little whiteboard here today, with my premium horrible handwriting. That’s what we like featuring here at CSJoseph.life. This is the ESTJ and … Let’s go ahead and move it over here just to see it a little bit, kind of more central here.

Chase: All right. Cool. This is the ESTJ. They’re part of the traditionalist temperament. They are structure/in charge for their interaction style. Direct, initiating, control for their interaction style.

Chase: Here are the four sides of their mind. We have the ego right here, their shadow, also known as their unconscious mind right here, their subconscious, which some circles call the anima or the animus, depending on what your gender is, and the superego, which is where their form of human corruption, the human condition, exists within the ESTJ mind.

Chase: Let’s talk about that. The ESTJ ego has rationale at the apex of their mind. They are extremely rational. This is why ESTJs make great project managers. They are very good at middle management. I wouldn’t put them in charge of a company, but I would definitely have them run my human resources. I would put them in charge of systems and processes and making sure people are compliant.

Chase: I would do the same thing with ISTJs because STJs kind of do the same thing, but ESTJs specifically are all about making sure the group is compliant, and enforcing it, whereas the ISTJ is more focused on, well, I’m just going to create the process and test the process, and the ESTJ can implement it. Right?

Chase: That’s kind of how they’re slightly different, because ISTJs are more perception-focused, but because ESTJ has their hero as Te that means they’re more decision-making-focused. Ah, but wait. ESTJ, right? J, J, for judging, right? ISTJs have J, too. What does this mean, Mr. Chase?

Chase: Well, ISTJs by comparison have introverted sensing as their hero and not Te, which makes them more perception-based. They’re actually perceiving more than actually judging, but because they’re introverted we still say they’re a J type.

Chase: Just because you have a J next to you doesn’t mean that you’re not more perceiving. People need to understand that. For introverts, it’s not that way. If you’re an introverted J type, it’s the reverse. You’re actually more perception. If you’re an introverted perceiving type, you’re actually more J. You’re actually more decision-making-based, and a lot of people don’t understand that.

Chase: Socionics, developed by the Russians, however, actually is way more accurate with how their letter system works compared to the MBTI. They actually know the judging/perception distinction between introverts and extroverts, so they’ve made adjustments there.

Chase: Anyway, more on the ESTJ. They’re very rational. This makes them extremely organized. They’re all about process, routine, especially when combined with their Si parent, that makes them very disciplined. They have a lot of self discipline. They got to be comfortable. If they’re not comfortable, they’re gonna have a problem and they’re gonna let you know it.

Chase: They like tasting new things and having new experiences. They’re willing to have almost any experience as long as it’s responsible for them to have that new experience or they’re willing to take the risk. An ISTJ, because they’re Si hero they’d be more willing to take a risk, but ESTJ not as much because they’re very responsible with their introverted sensing, with their Si. They really want to make sure that it will be the best experience possible that they could get. They want to optimize it. They’re not as open to trying anything like ISTJs are, but they’re still pretty open.

Chase: All right, so for their inner child, their inner child is extroverted intuition. They’re all about what other people want. It’s very important when you’re with ESTJs that you realize that they’re all about what other people want. When you’re around an ESTJ, never ask them what they want, which engages their trickster, because they have no clue. They’re completely unaware of what they want. They have no clue, so don’t ever ask an ESTJ what they want. You just get a blank stare.

Chase: But what you do around ESTJs is say, “Well, I want this,” and, “I want that,” and they’ll either look at you funny, like, “Well, why do you want that?” Then the rational will engage with the rational hero. It’ll be like, “Well, I don’t feel like, Fi inferior, I don’t feel like you should think that because it’ll give you a bad future, which will give me a bad experience later. Because if you’re having a bad future that means you’re going to end up giving me a bad experience because I have to deal with your stupid, and I don’t feel good about that.”

Chase: You see what I mean? People’s thinking and sentences just go all over the place inside whichever side of the mind they’re in at that point in time. Sometimes people could switch between these rapid quick, and in the same paragraph they could actually be engaging two or three of the sides of their mind at the same time. It depends how balanced and how mature they are, right?

Chase: Anyway, extroverted intuition child is all about innocently wanting to give what other people want. The child always wants to give, especially an extroverted function child wants to give people balloons and candy. Yay! Whereas an introverted child function wants to receive the balloons and candy.

Chase: An ESTJ is giving you balloons and candy for what you want. Oh, you want candy? I’m gonna give it to you, or you want balloons or flowers? I’m gonna give it to you. You want to have a better future? I’m going to give you advice because I’m gonna give it to you. You know what I mean? That’s what ESTJs are all about.

Chase: Si parent, also, kind of makes them prefer to be on the bottom in the bedroom. They like to receive sensation. That also includes men, by the way. An ESTJ has no problem with their woman being on top and riding them, if you know what I mean, but that’s basically kind of how they work.

Chase: They can switch into a giving sensation mode with their [inaudible 00:08:41] and they’re actually really good at it, but over time it’ll just tire them out and they’ll have to go back to their ego. They’ll want their, like if it’s a male, they’ll want their woman to take over, or if it’s a female ESTJ they ant their man to be on top and really drive the sensation in that sexual encounter, for example.

Chase: We’re actually going to dive a little bit more into sexuality in some upcoming videos, but more on that later.

Chase: All right. Introverted feeling. It’s very interesting with ESTJs because that’s where their insecurity exists. The fourth function is where a person’s insecurity exists. An ESTJ’s insecure about introverted feeling, how they feel. They’re insecure about how they feel about anything, including themselves. They’re very insecure about their self worth. ESTJs walk around every day afraid that they’re a bad person. They literally walk around afraid that they’re a bad person.

Chase: This gives you an opportunity because then it’s like … Then you could say, “I think,” because you’re saying I think that [inaudible 00:09:43] because their hero’s trying to look for other people’s thinking, “I think you’re a good person, ESTJ, because of x, y, z. I’m giving you reasons for your hero to chew, and it’s supercharging your Fi [inaudible 00:09:55] to feel really good about yourself. Yay.”

Chase: That’s literally what happens. If you’re trying to social engineer them all you have to do is focus on giving them a good experience, always state what you want, tell them that you think really good of them, and they’ll love you forever. They’ll be loyal to you. So loyal that they’ll even die for you. I mean, that’s literally how it works. ESTJs, they put up a big front, really tough on the outside, but they got that really soft, gushy center on the inside.

Chase: That Fi inferior tastes great. I love Fi inferior, by the way. It’s awesome because eventually they get over their insecurity as they grow and mature. Although, most people, they usually default to the insecurity first, but if they have experience with their Si, or if they have … Or if they know what to do with their Ni then they can get over their insecurity pretty easily because they’ve been around the block, right?

Chase: When ESTJ aspires they can aspire their Fi and feel really good and have a really high moral awareness, a super high wise form of morality, right? Because Fi is also where morality is, and that gives them access. The fourth function is the ESTJ gateway into the subconscious. They become the INFP because they got over their insecurity, and you have to get over your fourth function and control it or activate it, or conquer your insecurities, to gain access to the subconscious anytime you want.

Chase: Then they aspire, and then they have these crazy one-on-one super mega deep conversations with people because, let’s be honest, guys, ESTJ’s ego, they’re really shallow people. I’m sorry, but that’s really how it is. Why? Well, it’s because their [inaudible 00:11:47]. [inaudible 00:11:50] causes ESTJs to have a very elitist point of view with how people look.

Chase: For example, if an ESTJ spots you have your shoe not tied, or if you’re wearing a ball cap backwards on your head, they’re going to lose respect for you instantly. ESJTs are all about first impressions because their Se critic. They hold themselves to an impossibly-high standards of looking good at all times, which is why they’re in the gym all the time, because if they have excess body fat they can’t live with themselves. It really bothers them. It bothers their Se critic, especially in their youth.

Chase: They go out of their way to lose that excess body fat. It’s like, well, I put in the effort. I remember I put in the effort with my Si parent, so you should be able to do what I’ve done. You would want to be able to do what I’ve done. You should do it, and you would want to do it, because I did it.

Chase: ESTJs are all like this. They all do this in some capacity. Doesn’t make them a bad person because they’re insecure about feeling bad that they already feel bad that they’re a horrible person anyway. That’s why you could see, well, I think the world of you, and then they feel good about themselves.

Chase: ESTJs are amazing to be in a relationship with at that point in time, especially when they’re with ESTPs because ESTPs totally love to ride that [inaudible 00:13:07] with their Se hero. They love to give it, like, every possible experience they can for some reason. ESTPs are the next video, so we’re actually going to be talking about that more at length.

Chase: [inaudible 00:13:19] feeling. They get over their moral insecurities and they become … Instead of being as shallow they become super deep, and then they start … They become the dreamer. The dreamer, the INFP. They’re an overseer ego, and then they’re the dreamer INFP. They’re like the hermit who’s levitating over the water perfectly still. People are throwing rocks at the hermit and nothing’s even changing because nothing can pull them off their juju, their absolute state of self-discipline.

Chase: It’s because they want to learn every philosophy there is. That’s why ESTJs in their youth, they studied Plato, they really … They go out of their way to understand as much about philosophy as possible so that when they reach middle age, when they’ve conquered their insecurity, they could become the INFP because everyone in their ego’s trying to become the subconscious, because it really makes them elated when they’re really good at being the opposite of who they are. Right?

Chase: Being super deep and having that one-on-one conversation where they’re giving people advice all the time, when they’re trying to be super helpful and give them … Help them gain a better future, a better social future, because, remember, an INFP is an idealist, right? They become this ideal person that’s very people-focused and they’re giving them advice, trying to give them a better future.

Chase: Then they get so disappointed, especially their Se critic, that no one’s even listening to them. It’s like, retarded. They’re like, “Why are you not even listening to me? I’ve been around the block. I’ve done this before. I know what to do and I’m going to give you advice. You should probably listen to me. You should, Se critic, probably listen, Te hero, to me. You would want to listen to me, Ne child, because I’ve been around the block, Si parent, and I feel good about … I felt bad in the past, Fi, Si, because of this issue. You would want to hear about my experience so that you know what you can do.”

Chase: You see what I’m saying? That’s literally how it ESTJs go and their mind just bounces all around these cognitive functions. They literally come out in their sentences and our behavior, right? Yeah. They become the dreamer and they’re doing that, right?

Chase: Let’s go down here. The fifth function is the nemesis function. This is where a person’s worry exists, the nemesis function, because it’s the nemesis to the hero. The ESTJ male or female, they all worry about whether or not they’re smart. Ti nemesis is like they worry about if they’re right, they worry about if they’re correct, they worry about whether or not they’re accurate.

Chase: They have to constantly take their ideas to other people with their Te hero and be like, “Hey, what do you think about this?” Or, “Hey, would you want to do this?” Get all of that external information from fellow human beings so that they get over their worry.

Chase: The same thing goes with their insecurity. Hey, what do you think about this? I feel this. I feel this. I think this is a bad thing, or this is a good thing. Would you want to do that? What do you think about that? To help get over their worry they also compensate with their functions to help get over their worry, right?

Chase: We talked about Se critic already. They try to give people the best possible experience to the point where they get really super perfectionist. If they’re not going to be able to deliver the ideal party they’re just not even going to put on a party at all because they’re like, “Oh, I’m probably going to suck at it, so I’m not going to do it,” but when they actually do it they’re amazing.

Chase: They really hold themselves to this insanely-high standard of how they dress, how they sound, how they walk, their posture has to be perfect. All of it, because they’re so critical towards themselves as to how … As to the kind of experience or sensations that they’re giving to other people.

Chase: They hold themselves to this impossibly-high standard. That’s why they can come off super elitist. Oh, wow. You shop at Walmart? You’re such a loser. That’s because of extroverted [inaudible 00:17:19] critic. They’re criticizing other people for looking bad or for allowing themselves to go into physical environments, Se, that would inhibit their status, Te. Remember, extroverted thinking is all about a person’s status. The more status someone has, the better they feel good.

Chase: They don’t have to be right. As long as everyone around them thinks they’re cool they can feel cool. They don’t have to be truly cool. They don’t have to actually be cool, but as long as everyone thinks they’re cool it’s okay. I could feel good about myself. They can get that way because, remember, in the absence of communications or explanations perceptions become reality. Te exists to change people’s thoughts and perceptions, and to manage and manipulate thought, and to cause people to believe things. It’s all about changing belief. Doesn’t have to actually be true logically, but as long as people believe it that’s fine.

Chase: Although, ESTJs don’t really use that maliciously as much as other types, like the ENFP. They really use it maliciously, for example, or the INFP. FPs are really malicious when it comes to messing with people’s beliefs and thoughts and perceptions for their personal gain. ESTJs don’t really do it that much because they still have the Si critic kind of reeling them in, and the Si parent reeling them in, because they’re still rooted in reality and not metaphysics like the INFP or the ENFP is.

Chase: These videos are going to be pretty long, by the way, because we have a lot of stuff to cover per type.

Chase: The next one, the final function is the Ni trickster. The Ni trickster is their unaware function. Introverted intuition, what I want. An ESTJ will never know what they want. All you have to do is ask them, “Hey, what do you want to do?” Or, “Hey, what kind of lunch you want to get,” or this. They’ll have no idea.

Chase: Whenever you’re working with an ESTJ or you’re in a relationship with ESTJ, stop being afraid of telling them what you want. Just straight up direct tell them what they want. Their best friend type’s an ESTP. That’s the highest compatibility for their type.

Chase: ESTPs are triple direct, so if you want to have a good relationship with an ESTJ you should try by being direct with them and not be a fast talker like me. Just straight up tell them, “I want x or y, or z.” They’ll be like, “Oh thank god I don’t have to … There’s no guesswork anymore. Okay, yeah. Let’s get that for you,” for example. You got to watch out for that Ni trickster.

Chase: They’ll even make some really bad investment decisions. Never ask an ESTJ … Or they’ll make bad purchasing decisions, like buying a car. They can be easily sold in certain cases. As long as that person makes a good first impression they can be sold because they have introverted intuition trickster. They don’t know what they want.

Chase: All of a sudden they think they want something, like deciding that they want to go to massage school all of a sudden, and then they realize this is probably not the experience that I wanted to have after it’s happened a little bit. Then they end up disengaging. It’s kind of like a cheap version of being a starter type, you don’t finish things that you start.

Chase: ESTJs do that naturally because they have introverted intuition trickster. It’s really frustrating to them and everyone around them. It’s not their fault. It’s just they’re not aware of introverted intuition. They aren’t aware that tomorrow … Or where the best path that they should take. They just try to experience everything that they can and then figure out which path to take after they’ve experienced all paths. That’s generally how ESTJs work.

Chase: Oftentimes ESTJs will complain about how they live their life backwards. It’s because they have all their fun in their youth and then when they’re old they’re no really doing anything interesting anymore.

Chase: Like my coworker would say that all the time, but that’s not really true. As long as he would just focus on actually becoming an INFP subconscious and accessing it on a regular basis through his ego, through his fourth function, he’d be a lot happier because then he’d be that amazing philosophy professor or coach to coach other people [inaudible 00:21:22] or massage or anything that he’s really skilled with, especially with his Se critic. He can convey that knowledge to other people.

Chase: The demon is extraverted feeling, also known as ethics or how other people feel. An ESTJ does not give a damn how anyone else feels because they are only really aware of how they feel. They’re not really aware of how anyone else feels, so they don’t care about ethics or social order, social protocol, social rules, social minutiae.

Chase: Being social just doesn’t really mean that much to them. Yes, they’re very social and can be … Because they’re extraverted and they want to be around people and they want to be able to gain the energy and do that, but don’t expect them to care about your problems. Never bring up your problems to ESTJs because ESTJs are very aware of the problems that they already have with their introverted feeling inferior function.

Chase: They have to spend all their mental energy focusing on their own problems before they even … Because their introverted feeling is so low they don’t even have any mental space to comprehend that other people have problems around them that they can’t solve, unless, of course, they’re in their INFP philosophy side.

Chase: Because if it’s a question of philosophy or a question of process, or a question of the wrong routine for another person, they’ll definitely step in and provide advice to help at tat point in time, but they’re not going to do it to make them feel better. They’re going to do it to give them extroverted intuition, a better future. That’s what the ESTJ is trying to do is give people, especially youth, a better future. It’s not to make them feel good, but it’s to give them a better future.

Chase: ESTJs don’t care about making other people feel good. In fact, everyone else kind of needs to be focused on giving them a good experience and making them comfortable and giving them … Making them feel good.

Chase: For example, if there’s a room of just Fe users, because they’re all trying to make each other feel good, and it’s just a giant Fe circle jerk, ESTJs … If one ESTJ just walks in the room, they’re the only Fi user in the room, the only introverted feeling user, if they’re feeling bad the entire room will feel bad. That entire room needs to make that person feel good, the ESTJ feel good, and then the entire room will feel good, because everyone, Fe users, all these Fe users, are adsorbing the Fi energy, because that’s a source function because that’s an introverted feeling function. That’s how ESTJs work.

Chase: They’re also not afraid to troll anyone with their Se. They can be very witty. They will make fun of you at any opportunity that they see because it’s like, wow, dude, nice having your shoes not tied, or where did you learn how to tie a tie? Or, do those colors match with your suit? Because I think you’re having a fashion emergency. That’s literally ESTJland for you.

Chase: Anyway, also, there’s a superego. Let’s say if they’re faced with a problem, the ego tries to solve the problem. Nope. It’ll go either to the shadow or the subconscious next. Subconscious, nope, that’s not going to solve the problem. [inaudible 00:24:33] shadow, [inaudible 00:24:35] shadow, is not going to solve the problem.

Chase: All I have left is my mentor parasite superego left. What they do when they’re really, really, really angry, they turn into this very cruel, absolutely cruel human being. Probably the cruelest human being you have ever met, to the point where they are so scathing you would be willing to burn the bridge of the relationship with the ESTJ immediately because they’re augmenting everything that they’ve ever experienced with you at once, and then forcing it down your …

Chase: Everything negative they’ve experienced with you and forcing it down your throat with their ENFJ parasites [inaudible 00:25:18]. They’re just reminding you about how much of a horrible person you are and every bad thing they’ve ever experienced with you, for example, while saying, “This is true, this is true. Why should I even be in a relationship with you? Why should I trust you? Why should I work with you? Because you’re a bad person. No one feels good around you. Heres everything I’ve experienced and I’m going to show you everything bad that you’ve ever done to me.”

Chase: It’s all about poetic justice to ESTJs. Poetic justice. They take it very seriously when they’re in their parasite demon mode with their ENFJ superego. Any way to screw you over in that moment they will do it with poetic justice, so be careful.

Chase: If you have ever wronged an ESTJ they will remember, they do hold grudges, and they will take revenge on you if you push them too far, because, remember, they’re all about loyalty. Never push a loyal person, also known as an Si user, never push an Si user too far to the point where they don’t give a damn. Stop loyalty checking people.

Chase: I get that there’s half the types out there are Se users. Se users want people to be loyal to them. ESTJs are all about being loyal to them, but you … Se users have this problem where you’re trying to check on whether or not this person is still loyal to you, so you give them a bad experience, you push them away with your Se, and the ESTJ’s like, “I deserve better than this because I’ve done and put up with your crap for so long. I’ve done and bent over backwards for you. I’ve done all these things. Let me list all those things I’ve ever done for you, and you have the audacity to push me over a cliff just to test if I’ll bounce back? Really? Well, screw you, then. I’m moving on. You just burned the bridge.”

Chase: You have that risk with any Si user, but ESTJs, especially because of Se critic, do not take that. They do not appreciate that whatsoever. That’s why, because they have Si parent, they’re really best to be with Se parents or Se heroes to be able to make sure that that Si parent has enough Se energy, because Se child doesn’t have enough to make Si parent besides the parent child relationship. The parent will just parent the child, especially with the Se critic, old man. It’s not going to work, an old man parenting the child, then. No. There has to be enough Se to make the Si comfortable and to keep the Si loyal.

Chase: Anyway, that concludes today’s video on the ESTJ overview. I’m going to be doing one of these overview profileish videos for each of the 16 types. If you found this video helpful or educational then go ahead and leave a like or subscribe. If you have any questions, please leave it in the comments section. I will do my best to answer it.

Chase: I’m getting a lot of requests for videos on Twitter as well. You guys can message me direct or you can also post on the videos. If you have any video requests I’ll definitely get them in the queue. Some of them I’ll move them up or I’ll move them down, but right now I have well over 300 videos planned, so if you want to see something or if you have any questions, have at it. I will do my best to make sure I get those questions answered.

Chase: Anyway, I might do another video today. I’m not sure, but, yeah, so I’ll see you guys tonight.

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